D&D 5E Crazy Ideas 5E Should Not Adopt

[Crazy Jerome]

78 - There are no "pure" races. There aren't even any half races. Every character is made up of a mixture of different stocks, and PCs must have at least 8 different influences, mixed from 16 parts ("fey" "earth", "dragon", etc.). You can take a single part up to three times. Monsters are more varied, but still nearly always have at least 4 influences. Humans, by definition, have a little bit of everything--and are called "mongrels" by all right-thinking peoples.

If you take "fey", you have pointed ears. Even if you are otherwise a troll.

(I've flirted with something similar in homebrew systems. In my defense, these systems were in no way like D&D. )

 

[Tortoise]

Halflings are so fat they need to be carted around in dungeon carts.

All demi-humans besides humans are considered monsters and are killed on sight.

Instead of dice, each game ships with a cat. If the cat knocks over your miniatures, your character takes damage. If the cat ever dies, you need to buy another copy of the game.

D&D will borrow from Dragonball Z. No wizards can cast spells unless the player grunts and make hideous grimaces for 1 second per spell level.

The box can be used as a littler box. Litter not included. If the cat makes a grunting face while using the box all players save vs spells.

 

[kitsune9]

How far is too far?

1. To speed up combats, all fights are decided by one d20 roll. If you hit, you win.
3. Elves are better than all other races at everything.

1. I opt for the coin flip. Winner gets to keep the miniatures placed on the board.
3. I'm totally down with Elves being better than your namby-pamby everyone else.

 

[Kannik]

1. The new campaign world is announced to be Ecordia
2. Players must use a thesaurus (improperly) to describe their actions -- no adjective or verb can ever be reused by that player.
2½. A Rat Pelvis Dagger becomes the most powerful weapon in the game.
3. Clerics may only follow the one true deity, Mrifk.
4. A highly detailed critical hit chart will be included, with precise locations such as "between the testicles."
5. All games will abruptly end as the last of the mimeographed pages have been lost.

peace,

Kannik

 

[El Mahdi]

The box can be used as a littler box. Litter not included. If the cat makes a grunting face while using the box all players save vs spells.

Is it a Save or Die effect...?

 

[Andor]

The box can be used as a littler box. Litter not included. If the cat makes a grunting face while using the box all players save vs spells.

Is it a Save or Die effect...?

It depends how they rolled on the cat food miscability table.

 

[Crazy Jerome]

This is turning into a cat-based game. You probably play a cat person, swinging a dead cat (or maybe a pole cat), using the cat resolution system. "Cat" is the new "Level". I dread the initial Order of the Stick parody.

 

[Aramax]

23 - copper pieces = pennies, silver pieces = nickels, gold pieces = dimes, platinum pieces = quarters. When you get treasure, you can only haul out of the dungeon what you are willing to carry in a bag over the next three days. Those outside the USA must go to an exchange bank to get appropriate change, though the Canadians will probably be able to cheat and use their own currency.

use this plus you must pay the DM for starting equipment,he gives you treasure in Monopoly money

 

[thedungeondelver]

- Giants as a playable race
- Izzledore as the default adventuring locale
- SUVs as a mode of transportation

It just won't end well.

 

[Aeolius]

SUVs as a mode of transportation

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHNdcjglhsc"]Lawgiva!![/ame]