Not a troll. Someone with occasionally (but not always) unpopular attitudes towards popular culture.
For example, I don't have any particular hate on for Paris Hilton. I think she's remarkably unattractive for a woman who gets her picture published so often, and I don't really understand why that happens but I don't know a blessed thing about her other than she's really rich and parties a lot. As far as I know she doesn't steal money, kidnap children or beat women, so she's ahead of a good portion of the human race, at any rate. So whatever. Save your hate for people who are bad, for crying out loud. There's no shortage of them, that's for sure.
And I still liked D&D better than Pirates. D&D was very much like a movie I would have made if somebody had asked me to make a D&D movie fifteen years ago. Nowadays I'd like to think I'd come up with something a little more interesting, but in my twenties I think I'd have come up with something pretty much like that. It was very much what my campaigns were like in those days, which is something I really liked about it. It was certainly made by somebody who'd played a lot of D&D and wanted to get that experience on screen.
They failed, no question. I'm not saying it ISN'T a bad movie. It's horrendous. But at least it gives the impression of having been made with love and imagination. And I'm fond of it for that reason. People are WAY too hard on it -- in a world where cynical crap like Conan The Destroyer and Pirates of the Caribbean get trumpeted as "fun", that an honest, uncomplicated (if pretty stupid and badly made) movie gets savaged with such violence strikes me as very unfair.
If it had been called The Dragon's Staff people would be putting it up with Beastmaster or The Sword and the Sorcerer, which is where it belongs (I don't think it's quite as good as either, but it's better than Krull, at least). It's just a cheesy fantasy movie, not out of line for that genre in terms of production value, acting ability, screenplay or direction. It's got some good stunts, okay swordfights, funny moments, charming leads, creepy (if spectacularly goofy (I'm looking at YOU, Jeremy)) bad guys, a few monsters and great big aerial dragon battle with explosions and everything.
It's just not that bad. Yes there are some spectacularly bad performances (I will never be able to take Thora Birch seriously as an actress). Yes there are some spectacularly bad costumes (what the HECK was that elf woman wearing? What was that thing?). Yes the story is simplistic beyond simplistic. Yes the beholders are stupid. Yes, yes, yes. Maybe people don't remember Highlander all that well. Or The Archer. Or Jason and the Argonauts. There's a LOT of cheese in those movies. They wouldn't be what they are without the cheese. This was just one more cheesy fantasy movie, and I for one am proud to stand up say I like a little cheese in my fantasy.
It's better than peanut butter because, ew, sticky.