I guess my disconnect comes from what "OSR" and "classic gaming" means to me. I did not come of age in the Gygax era. My first D&D rulebook was the AD&D 2nd edition PHB, and I didn't really get deep into the hobby until the mid-90s. In my group during that era, a character death was something that impacted the story.
What makes you think character death in the OSR-style of play doesn't impact the story? Of course it does. It's just not considered a fail state of the game as with modern games. One character dies and the player makes a new one. But, importantly, that death effects the story. It always does.
Those of you who know me from these boards might be surprised that I haven't always been a Killer DM - in my earlier games it was very rare for a PC to die.
We didn't play a style of game where mutation, mutilation, or death was done for laughs.
DCC is only like this in regards to PC death in the 0-level funnel, not the entire game. But you wouldn't know that because you've only played through one badly-run funnel.
In a board game like HeroQuest where your character was just a nameless token on a board, it was okay. But in a roleplaying game, where really the only thing you had was your character, their personality, and interaction with the campaign world, it was something to be avoided.
Why? You can always make another one. There's nothing lost but the few minutes it takes to roll a new character and whatever progress that character made, depending on the DM. Starting a new PC with 1/2 the dead PC's XP and gold was common.
In a game when a DM can roll a 1d6, count around a table to pick out Player #x (where x=the number of the player he rolled randomly) and then a roll a 1d4 to pick out Character #y (where y=the number of your character he rolled randomly) and you just die - that isn't my kind of game.
Right. And as has been repeatedly stated: that's not how DCC works. Your Judge was bad. The game doesn't do that. The Judge you played with did. Maybe this time that will sink in.
Same thing at higher levels in DCC.
...that you haven't played. By your own admission. You have not played more than one 0-level funnel.
You roll on a random chart and you accidently lop off your own head...
No. That's literally not in the game. There is a fumble chart. The absolute worst that can happen is you take normal damage from your weapon +1. For that to happen you'd need to roll a natural 1 on a d20, so 5%...and be wearing heavy armor...roll a natural 16 on a d16, so 6.25%...for a combined total of 0.3125%. So three times in 1000...you'll hurt yourself with +1 damage. There's literally no way to cut your own head off.
or get pulled into the Nine Hells.
Not in the rule book there's not.
We get it. You didn't like a game you played once. But this is getting ridiculous.
I don't like that kind of stuff being left up to chance.
It's not. It's all a direct consequence of actions the players take. You make an attack, there's a chance of a fumble. But again, there's zero chance of decapitating yourself. You cast a super-powerful spell, there's a chance of misfire or corruption. It's not the Judge literally randomly rolling and telling you something bad happened. Again, your Judge was trash. Your issues here are not with the game as written, they're with the trash Judge who flubbed your first session.
If dying is the result of a random chart roll, then what use is there in skilled play, good tactics, cooperation, or any of the other things we admire about this hobby? When the very things that we celebrate about the hobby don't matter, the feel turns into a parody of the game.
That's emphatically not the case. Not that it matters.