(Eberron) Legacies - Updated 15 June

[Pure Puppet]

Oh! An update!

I really enjoy how the spells you use are renamed like they are. Very flavorful.

'Eye of The Sun' clinched it. I do have this adventure saved on my harddrive. Of course, there's no dragon in it, so it sounds like it's been heavily modified. That's actually kind of cool.

In response to your last post, about how if it was a zombie beholder? It wouldn't necessarily lose all the eye rays. There's an undead beholder in the Forgotten Realm Campaign Setting called a Death Tyrant that still retains some of the rays. Maybe that's what you fought.

Um. And as to why I didn't post that when you first replied to me? I've been away, and I'm really something of a lurker.

 

[Shieldhaven]

It was some species of zombified beholder. Dunno if it was actually a Death Tyrant.

And I can hardly criticize other people for slowness in response. I mean, it'd been over a month since I last updated this, just because we hadn't played in so long. I probably won't update for two more weeks, since I always write the entry the afternoon before the game.

Just as a teaser: in this session, Teagen was burned by rain, Fel was trampled by worms, and both Gerron and Fel were swallowed by a starfish in the middle of the desert. WTF, mates? I'm sure Teagen will have all sorts of snarky things to say about this in his journal.

Haven

 

[Shieldhaven]

We did not return to the drow settlement as I had expected. Hoping to avoid the wrath of the dragon, we went south. We traveled for three days with only one sighting – through the canopy, we spotted a wing that was either brass or bronze. It went by much too fast for any of us to be sure. Brass and bronze are, according to what I have been told, among the weaker of the draconic breeds. They are generally more selfish and concerned with shorter-term goals – decades rather than centuries or millennia. Nevertheless the dragon remains our foremost concern.

Xilonen led us over the mountains and into the desert. This only compounds our worries, now that we do not even have the benefit of tree cover. I have a certain feeling of resignation; I do not think there is anything we can do to avoid this wrath, and so I feel as though we are traveling under a sentence of death.

Xilonen left us to return to the jungle when we got to a pair of stone pillars (inscribed with the words, “Curse those who enter unbidden”) that marked the head of a road in the desert. He told us that this is where he had parted company with the students, and this is where he would meet us again in five days. The road continues south to a fork. The left fork leads to the tomb of a giant king from shortly after the coming of the desert. That tomb was built by the king’s slaves. According to legend, it was made small enough that other giant nobles could not raid his tomb without great difficulty. The right fork leads to the giant city of Pazar.

With this in mind, we passed through the pillars. The sand here is ashy, possibly the result of a magical backlash as giants fought off an invasion from another plane of existence. That was just the start of the deeply strange things that occurred. We fell afoul of a rainstorm; when a drop of rain hit my hand, my skin was burned as if by acid. Not long after, we saw swarms of worms approaching us. Fearing that they were driven forth by something much larger and more fearsome, I did not destroy them with a Shockwave as I ought to have done. Fel was trampled by one of the three distinct swarms. We eventually dealt them sufficient injury that they changed course, and we never did determine that there was anything pursuing them.

I think it was later that day that we were attacked by a giant starfish in the middle of the desert. Gerron and Fel were both swallowed by this starfish and had to cut themselves out of its belly. I felt that this really capped off the absurdity of the earlier incidents of the burning rain and the trampling worms. My spells were only vaguely useful in this battle, though I did deal the final blow to it with the guttering remnants of a Scorching Ray.

We have turned toward the tomb first, after a great deal of discussion. We reasoned that a group of students in trouble in a tomb might be in more pressing danger than a group of students in trouble in a sand giant city. We still have no idea if we even ought to hope that they still live.

Some questions that remain:
Are the gods merely toying with us now? Will we ever get a few shreds of information that will actually prove to be useful in unraveling… whatever it is that’s going on in the world with the Dhakaani and the Cults of the Dragon Below?

 

[Shieldhaven]

We’re holed up in the temple that was built out in front of the pyramid. We had at least two more close brushes with death getting here, but maybe we’ll have time to rest and prepare more spells for a foray into the pyramid proper.

We met a flight of pegasi-mounted elves en route to the tomb. They landed and spoke with us, seeming impressed that such a small group was braving the desert. The worms are apparently known to them as “thunder herders,” and the massive sand-dwelling starfish is a “dust digger.” They also told us of the Thune dervishes, human nomads and cultists that worship the giants. The black smoke that we had seen in the distance was a sign of their burnt offerings. The land where they dwell is known as Terbekar, the Green Lands.

Once we parted ways with the elves, we saw a very tall figure moving across the sands, directly toward us. As it drew closer, we recognized it as a floating mummified giant – it seemed to walk a few inches above the sands, and left no tracks. I spoke to him in his own tongue, and he explained that he wished to be put to rest. When he was alive, he swore by the symbols of his office that the stopping of his heart would also stop the flowing of the waters of Athis. His subjects said that he was too harsh. The gods cursed him for his pride, and he will remain cursed until the symbols of his office are removed from his tomb.

We pressed onward, and in the night we were attacked by a band of nomads. A few of them were dervishes, but even so we defeated them handily. I later found myself regretting the spells I had cast in fighting them – a worthier foe awaited.

In the morning we came to the tomb, a pyramid with a temple built out in front of it. The nomads challenged us as we approached, but did not attack; we pretended to be merely interested in making a sacrifice to the “god” of the pyramid – having already concluded that the giant mummy was that god. Inside the main room of the temple, we encountered five or so cultists, led by a priest. He was “reading” from a white book with ornate fittings – holding the book upside down as he did so. I don’t believe the man could read a single word on the page. There was an altar by the back wall, and much like the passageway in the lizardmen’s pyramid, the walls of this room were covered with bas-relief depictions of the region’s history.

We maintained the façade of interest in the cult long enough to poke around a bit, but eventually we got bored of that game and Gerron jumped the priest, who turned out to be a tough customer indeed. He cast a Vengeful Shield of Flame upon himself, a spell that is beyond my own ability at present. Gerron was burned horribly during this battle; he only survived because Maeve hid under the altar with her hand resting on his ankle and chain-cast healing spells on him. The priest barely bothered to attack Gerron or anyone else, satisfied to heal himself and let the Shield devastate Gerron. We had a discussion of tactics afterward, and concluded that we went about things all wrong, but that is neither here nor there. I escaped nearly unscathed, though desperately low on spells. Strangely, no more cultists came pouring through the doors to support their allies – it turned out that the curtains pulled across a few of the doors acted as walls of perfect silence.

We explored the rest of the temple before engaging the sleeping junior priest and his band of cultists. The head priest’s book, when read properly, was actually an account that Amun-Re (now a giant mummy) had written during his life. We concluded, from references in the text, that the Sovereign Host and the Dark Six were simply known by slightly altered names. The head priest had a pair of bracers, which I claimed without hesitation, and a wand of Heal Grievous Wounds, which naturally went to Maeve. We don’t yet know the strength of the bracers or the number of charges remaining in the wand.

We found several statues with inset gems; these turned out to be magically trapped, and when Fel tried to pry out the jewel-eyes of one statue, he was paralyzed for a time.

Working our way around the temple, we came to the back door, which opens to a causeway into the pyramid. There is also a back door from the junior priest’s quarters, and Fel waited by that door as the rest of us attacked through the curtain of silence. It was not so dangerous a battle as the first, though Gerron was again in great danger – I need to improve his armor as soon as possible – and by the end I was well and truly drained of spells. We captured a bit more treasure and another few pages of interest, and holed up in the recently-occupied beds to recuperate a bit. It was a most taxing day, and I wonder what further surprises the pyramid itself may hold. The pages raise certain questions.

Some questions that remain:
Is it a divine force or a mortal one that causes the sacrifices in this temple to disappear, rather than remaining for use by the priests? How is Amun-Re’s actual tomb defended? Did the students come here at all? (This seems increasingly unlikely, unless they bypassed the temple and cultists entirely.) Exactly how many more cultists are there in the tribe of the Thune dervishes?

-----------------

Didn't post last week on account of no time to write and no way to justify writing an entry at the moment of a cliffhanger. This entry includes the last two sessions. We've just leveled to 6th - maybe a few of my woes of an insufficient spell column will be behind me. Most of us haven't bought our 6th level feats yet, as the DM has hinted that there may be Cool Lost Arts for us to learn in the pyramid.

 

[Shieldhaven]

And now we’re holed up in the pyramid, poking around for a way out. There is a small army of cultists outside – I suspect the ones we didn’t kill will go get the rest of the tribe and jump us when we emerge. And won’t that be fun.

Once we rested and refreshed our spells in the outer temple, we read our documents in greater detail and tried to make sense of them. There is definitely something that we are still missing about them, but it continues to elude me. We more thoroughly examined the temple, starting with its three statues. The first holds a serpent staff and a gem; it is probably a statue of Amun-Re himself. The second is a particularly large statue of white marble with open hands. Its eyes flashed blue when Fel was trying to remove them. It represents Koris, who we now know as Kol Korran. The third is female, holding a cup, with metal clothing laid onto the stone of the statue. This seems to be Arwis, or Arawai. The second book that we recovered has more things to say about the altars connected to these temples – that offerings always vanished from the Eastern Temple. This leaves me to wonder if the Eastern Temple refers to the altar of Arwis, or to the easternmost altar within the pyramid. We did not go into that room to examine it on our way in, so we don’t yet know which God that altar may be devoted to.

But I am getting ahead of myself. I turned Fel invisible so that he could scout ahead a bit, and he made quick & silent work of the two posted guards. We entered the pyramid as quietly as possible, coming to a four-way intersection. All three choices led to chambers with altars. Cultist-type activities were in progress in the left and right chambers, which we naturally did not wish to interrupt at the time (though in hindsight this may have been a tactical error), so we examined the central chamber and found therein a secret door leading deeper into the heart of the pyramid.

At about that moment, the cult-type activities of the other chambers came to an abrupt end, and we had a fight on our hands. I made Gerron big enough to block the hallway – which their spellcaster immediately dispelled. Probably a good idea for him, as Gerron was beginning to really tear apart their guys. I tossed off a few arcane bolts, just for fun, and then their caster heated up Gerron’s armor and we realized that it was time for the exeunt omnes. Gerron retreated through the secret door just before I did, and as he was pulling the door closed I rattled their cages with a Shockwave. I’m pretty proud of that one, to be honest, because I hit every single one that I could see. At the very least, it delayed them and made their caster burn a few more spells to get them on their feet.

There was another intersecting hallway, of roughly equal length with the earlier one. At each end of this hallway was a small circular chamber with a hole in the floor; in the east, water flowed from a spout through the hole and into a chamber below, while in the west, the water seemed to have stopped. Gerron explored the chamber below some time later and discovered that it was filled with water, with what might have been a sort of magical drain. The water healed him when he drank it.

Continuing farther, we came to a second secret door, which hid a room with yet another altar. Nine statues of Amun-Re were set into the walls, and the name was scrawled over every available surface of the room. When Maeve placed her hands in the handprints and said the name, one statue slid away and revealed a passage to the “Treasure Room” and “The True Tomb of Amun-Re.” Unsurprisingly, both had been picked clean long, long ago. We found a grand total of three copper coins, so I left a fourth behind.

And that brings me to the current moment – Gerron is drying off, the cultists have slackened their pounding on the secret door, and we’re kind of stuck.

Some questions that remain:
Where the hell did Amun-Re keep his symbols of office that are so bleeding important? How many other secret doors are scattered around this place that we have not yet found? How many cultists does it take to find one secret door (in their own headquarters, no less)?

------------------------------

I felt very useful in this session - my new spell slots all went to utility spells that came in handy. And now that Gerron has his second attack per round, he's dishing out more devastation than I can quite imagine. We just desperately need to do something about his AC. Maybe I'll find time for some serious item creation soon. Maybe monkeys will fly off my hindquarters...

 

[Shieldhaven]

This… may not be an improvement.

We searched every nook and cranny of the hallways behind the secret door and found little else of note. We tried any number of different theories, only to determine with great certainty that we needed to go back out and fight the rest of the cultists. They were waiting for us in some approximation of “ambush.” Gerron led the way into the room, and the cultists stepped out from behind their pillars in preparation to charge.

It didn’t go quite like they’d hoped. Because when you absolutely have to kill every cultist in a nice straight line, Accept No Substitutes. Lightning Bolt. It did not, in point of fact, kill any of them, but only one managed to avoid the full power of the blast. Then they charged toward us, which rather mystified me, but I suppose the clerics here really have their ducks in a row and don’t accept any namby-pamby cultists that won’t keep attacking someone who has already proven his ability to throw lightning. Suffice to say, Gerron and Fel made quick work of them all – though Maeve and I had some fun with melee combat. I even got in one or two solid hits, mighty warrior that I am.

So we resumed our painstaking search, this time on the three temple chambers. The east and west temples had large bowl-like depressions, about three feet across, in the floor with a magical everburning flame inside. The west temple’s sacrificial “bowl” had a couple of coins in it, while the east temple’s was totally empty. We found a second secret door with a hallway leading back to the same halls. At long last, one of us (I think it was Maeve) had some actual inspiration and stepped completely into the east temple’s bowl. She vanished, and we soon followed.

We found ourselves in a small octagonal room. Four alternating walls – I’m inclined to think of them as the cardinal directions, even though I haven’t the vaguest idea if that’s correct, or even which one is north – have archways, filled with mist. The other walls have levers, all of them in the up position. There is a skeleton lying here, pointing with a sword toward one of the doorways. We have been debating our course of action before actually experimenting with the levers, and so I took a few moments to write. The mist in the archways is tied to Enchantment – a sort of Phrenic Effluvium, of the sort that the greatest of wizards can cast, perhaps? Maeve and I have not been able to identify it with certainty as yet.

Some questions that remain:
Even if we could go back, how many cultists would we have to kill to get away? Which of these levers will kill us instantly, and which will lead us to the Amun-Re’s symbols of office? Is it a good sign or a bad one for a skeleton to be pointing to one particular doorway? How many people have passed this way, and is it possible that the students are trapped back here somewhere? The tome says that others have vanished from the temple, never to be seen again – does that mean that they all died, or that the exit is somewhere far from here?

 

[Shieldhaven]

I can say without reservation that this is the strangest place I have ever been; it may even stretch my definition of the word “place” in new and eye-crossing sorts of ways. We have just finished killing a creature that enfolded Fel in its flesh and injured him badly. Unsurprisingly we are beginning to run low on prepared spells and time, as Xilonen will be expecting us.

To begin where I last left off: the fog is not the Phrenic Effluvium that I feared, but it is related somehow. We experimented with the four levers, all of which had exactly the same effect – a force drew all metallic objects (including people encased in armor) to the ceiling at high speed. Fel and Gerron were hurt a bit in learning this; strangely, they did not seem to note the comedic potential of the whole situation. The levers had no other discernable effect.

After much discussion and planning, Maeve stepped into the fog. A rope was tied around her waist, and Gerron held the other end. We had chosen the passage that the skeleton pointed to, for want of a better reason to choose any given passage. This is where things get really confusing, and our skills of nonlinear cartography were tested. I’m reasonably sure there’s no way to describe this place succinctly with the written word. Segments of clear hallway are broken up by this fog, which dampens sight, sound, and the wits. Maeve is having a slightly better time than I am of keeping it together while in the fog, but I think even she finds it difficult. Much as we were advised in the Wayfinder Foundation’s Guide to Illogical Structures, Maeve left chalk blazes on the walls. My mockery of Fel’s nigh-limitless supply of chalk is definitely coming to a middle.

We eventually came to a doorway, which Fel opened. The room had a broad, open floor, with a sort of ledge several feet up. A man sat on the ledge – Yowen, one of the students we sought. He told us of the splintering of his party, including the deaths of some. They reached the temple and wandered into a large room. One of the group was killed by a spear trap that filled the entire room. He commented that the Dean went to some expense to get their team here. Yowen has seen undead in the area, some cultists, and a sphinx – from his description, probably an androsphinx, the male of the species and the one best known for offering riddles to those it meets. Supporting himself entirely with his spells, Yowen has been camped out on that ledge for several days now, I believe. He is a cleric of some description – we didn’t ask too many questions on that account.

There seem to be a series of similar rooms along what I have arbitrarily designated as the eastern side of this complex – it’s on the right-hand side of my map, anyway. The one “north” of Yowen’s room had the spear-trap; we cut down the student and checked him for identifying marks or usable goods. No such luck. I am reminded of how fortunate I am that, while we occasionally argue amongst ourselves, I can count on the loyalty of Gerron, Maeve, and Fel to watch my back and get some of my remains home to my family, if death should take me. Also, we keep our heads in bad situations better than some do, apparently.

We were attacked by a pack of ghouls as we left this room. Maeve annihilated them with a burst of holy energy. How intensely satisfying that must be.

The room to the “south” held the cloak-like creature that attacked Fel. We eventually killed it, though not without doing some harm to Fel. I threw a few more arcane bolts from my wand – need to be careful, though, since this is the only wand I’ve got at the moment. This room and the spear-room also had ledges running around them.

That brings me, I believe, to the present moment, in which time Maeve is healing Fel and we are getting a bite to eat.

Some questions that remain:
Will we really find Amun-Re’s symbols of office this way? Will there be anything left of the other students once we’re out of here? Does the sphinx guard the exit with a riddle, or is he just waiting for a snack? And how does it happen that he gets enough to eat in here, anyway? There can’t be that many lost adventurers.

----------------

Almost... seventh... level....

I could use some advice on 4th level spells for a transmuter - but I'm not willing to really ruthlessly powergame Polymorph, since I don't want the GM to kick me to death.

 

[Shieldhaven]

The madness of this places increaseth geometrically. If Gerron did not continually affirm that he also is seeing the same things I am, I would be convinced that the madness were my own. I write this while sitting watch in a room that seems to be a manifest zone of Dal Quor. This explains but does not relieve any of this wrongness.

We continued exploring the misty halls, finding another dead end, and more hallways that curved back on themselves. We had begun to follow the internal logic of the maze, however, and were not especially surprised by these discoveries. Then we came upon a room that was, rather improbably, inhabited by minotaurs. I still wonder what in this place fed them. My spells of Feline Grace and Aiysha's Fleetfoot made a significant difference in this battle, granting Fel in particular the speed to dance through our foes’ ranks devastate them. Maeve searched a pile of straw in that room and found a remarkable amount of gold.

Then we climbed a shaft up to a trapdoor in the ceiling of that room. My magic being long since exhausted (and I without any vertical-movement spells prepared in the first place), Gerron exhibited his remarkable skill at climbing, placing pitons and lowering a knotted rope so that the rest of us could ascend.

Above, we found a large room, lavishly decorated, with a massive statue of Amun-Re. The statue held a massive gem; Gerron and Fel insisted on trying to take it. This caused it to emit an unending, ear-splitting sound like unto a fog horn. Gerron tucked it into the bag of holding, which merely muffled the noise somewhat. Then the wraiths attacked, drifting through nearby doors. They attacked me immediately, though I had scrambled halfway into the trapdoor and barely managed to toss off a Shield of the Eldritch Forge. I tossed off arcane bolts from my wand as fast as possible, which left a lot to be desired. Gerron landed a couple of blows as the wraiths fled from Maeve. They did not return, possibly because we replaced the gem and it ceased its wailing.

We glanced into and readily dismissed the rooms the wraiths had inhabited, coming instead to the inside of a waterfall. This is where everything remotely sane begins to really, truly crumble. The large, domed stone room was home to two pomegranate trees. Two identical altars, covered in hieroglyphs and with two outlines of hands on top, stood in the middle of the room. I translated the hieroglyphs. Then a ripe pomegranate fell to the ground and exploded, badly injuring Gerron. When I said the first word, Turnin, with my hands in place, the handprints lit up. Regra caused all gravity in the room to reverse abruptly – we all managed to avoid slamming into the ceiling along with a dozen or so more exploding pomegranates. Logra caused all falling things to slow remarkable. And Neg ended any active magic and reset the whole pattern, including causing the light in the handprints to go out.

We decided to sleep the night in this maddening room, as it seems more or less safe – certainly no other creatures are likely to come here on purpose. The time I spent sleeping was no stranger than the time I’ve spent waking.

Some questions that remain:
Why the hell is there a manifest zone of Dal Quor in this pyramid? How big is this pyramid? Where the hell are we really? Will we ever be free of this hellish place and get home?

------------------

Seventh level: Attained. I'm picking up Greater Invisibility to make the rogue happier than a pig in slop, and Polymorph because... well, just because. I'm sure I'll find something useful but not abusively powergamey to polymorph Gerron into. Or maybe Maeve... she could be our new combat brute. =)

 

[Shieldhaven]

We manipulated the gravity-reversing magic just so – I had to pronounce the words very quickly, and in just the right order – to lift us slowly off the floor and grant us access to a door we found halfway up the wall. We proceeded through this door and up a corridor, eventually coming to a massive door. Then Maeve and I stopped to prepare the rest of our spells; at nearly the same time, additional spell energy (and spells of the Fourth Circle) became available to us. I feel an enormous sense of accomplishment in this. The Fourth Circle holds one of a transmuter’s most famed spells – Polymorph. I have also learned how to cast a Greater Cloak of Transparency; I expect that Fel will be very pleased when first I cast this spell on him.

We inspected the door at great length. Inscribed on it were the words: “Beyond these doors lie the Tests of the Pharaoh. Turn now from the doom of power and evil from a heartless man. Great and Awful is the horror beyond these doors – yet if You turn away, what lies beyond you shall never know.” Gerron lifted me up so I could examine some artwork above the door, which depicted a man reading something, and small figures bringing him books. Eventually we settled on opening the door.

Inside, a strange sight, difficult to describe. A staircase rose throughout the center of the room, with many landings along its course. At the top, one who we immediately guessed to be Munafik, and beyond him, a massive bronze fist, and a set of double doors.

Munafik greeted us and taunted us, asking if we came to die like all before us. We accepted the test, and the doors slammed behind us as I cast a few divinations to help me figure out what we could expect. Fel raced toward him, triggering the first landing. It conjured mud men of some sort. Gerron tried to fight them, only to find that they were too easy to cut in half – at which point they reformed as two full-strength mudmen. We hurried past.

Fel also triggered the defenses of the second landing – illusory walls of fire and stone that entirely deceived him. He was badly injured and jarred by his collision with the latter wall. Gerron, thinking perhaps to simply wade through the wall of fire, instead saw through its deceit and continued on his way. With his passage as our proof, we were all able to do the same.

At the third landing, a mirror spawned an image of Gerron that immediately attacked. The same occurred when Fel passed by. Unwilling to let loose two more images (and additional spellcasters, to boot), I transformed myself into a griffon and bore Maeve to the final landing, where we hurried past Munafik and the fist to the double doors. Fel was struck down by the fist. Gerron was embattled from several sides, but eventually he pushed his way past and reached the doors. We were forced to temporarily abandon Fel. Our weapons could not significantly injure Munafik, and the fist was a deadly foe that we did not expect to be able to kill. He continued to attack us with spells once we were all inside, and I was nearly killed. He is a stronger spellcaster than any we have yet seen, excepting only the beholder in the Eldeen Reaches. He was definitely capable of casting spells of the Fifth Circle.

Beyond the doors, we found a strange column of water, with a question mark inscribed in the floor before it. While Gerron ransacked Munafik’s sleeping chamber for clues, I stood on the mark and asked a question. A voice within said, “What is your quest?” I replied, “To restore the waters to the lands of Thune.” Then, “Whose holy chamber is this?” Noting the waters and the hand, I correctly guessed that these were the waters of Arwis, that we in the north call Arawai. The flow of the waters reversed, now coming up from the ground. Uncertain as to how to proceed, I delayed, and eventually they returned to their normal flow.

Gerron found a book, so evil in its nature that it harmed him. He showed it to me, but I did not take the time to translate – that will wait until later. Continuing our exploration, we found room filled with dangling chains. In one wall, there was a rough passage into the earth. Within, a clay golem attacked a changeling woman; we intervened moments too late to save her life. She was indeed one of the students we had sought. A jeweled canopic jar rested on a pedestal here, and Gerron quickly smashed it with his axe, drained of strength though he was by one of Munafik’s spells. The destruction of the jar felled the golem and Munafik at the same moment. We healed Fel, whom Munafik had paralyzed in anticipation of future torment.

We gathered together by the column of water to prepare for the next step. The power of Gerron’s dragonmark informed him that Amun-Re’s symbols of office are nearby, and we expect that the column of water will take us to them.

Some questions that remain:
Most of the pressing questions have been answered. But where are the rest of the students, and what condition are they now in? If possible, I will have Maeve speak with the one we found by magic. We may yet have to explore the rest of this damned pyramid – since we no longer know the way out at all. We will have to retrieve Yowen in any case.

------------------

Amusingly, Polymorph (that I was picking up with some reluctance) was one of the single most fun spells I have cast. And I'm looking forward to using it again in the future. There aren't all that many spells that I could squeeze +10 Str, +2 Con, +6 natural armor, Large size, 3 attacks per round, pounce, rake, and an 80 ft Fly speed out of. Voof. Also, turning one of us (could be anyone) into a troll for the first time ought to be deeply satisfying. Who wouldn't want natural reach, 23 Str, 23 Con, and +5 natural armor? Dude. What was I thinking? Oh, right, didn't want to be a ridiculous powergamer. Oh well. I have no choice but to embrace the powergame.

Haven

 

[Supaida]

I read this entire thing last night (well, early this morning, technically), and I loved it. It's got sort of a Douglas Adams feel to it: I can just see Arthur Dent trudging through Eberron as increasingly absurd and improbable things happen to him and mostly try to kill him. Write more!