Ebert gives Texas Chainsaw remake 0 stars

[Welverin]

If you could have seen something else I'd say you lost out, but if your wife would have forced you to see TCM you probably didn't.

 

[John Crichton]

Just reading this thread I am actually interested in seeing the remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I just saw Kill Bill and really enjoyed it. If TCM is better than it would be damn near a classic. However, I'll probably wait to see it when it comes to DVD/cable. Bay is one of my favorite directors (I know he's just the producer on this one). The problem is getting someone to come with me.

I scare easy.

Okay, seriously now. Next weekend is the Alien re-release and the next week will be The Matrix: Revolutions so there isn't much time to see a movie that one of my favorite critics hated. *


* Not that it will actually prevent me from ever seeing it but there is only so much time and money in every week to be spent on going out to the movies.

 

[nHammer]

http://www.suntimes.com/output/ebert1/wkp-news-texas17f.html

Boy he really DIDN'T like it..

Personally I think Ebert was being too nice in his review. There was no need to remake TCM, it was a complete waste of money. But, you know what? I don't blame the film studios for doing it. The studios know there will be people that are stupid enough to spend money to see inferior remakes of good movies.

I think the studios would probobly make more money if they rereleased the original instead of wasting the money to remake it.

 

[Kai Lord]

Personally I think Ebert was being too nice in his review. There was no need to remake TCM, it was a complete waste of money.

A 9 million dollar movie that has grossed 47 million in nine days. A complete waste. *snicker*

But, you know what? I don't blame the film studios for doing it. The studios know there will be people that are stupid enough to spend money to see inferior remakes of good movies.

Good thing you're not one of those stupid people. Now you get to spend your free time expressing a meaningless opinion on a movie. You haven't. Seen. Care to give your review of The Last Samurai? I know it hasn't been finished and no one has seen it yet, but since that isn't a prerequisite for you I'd love to hear your thoughts. Ditto for anyone else who's panned TCM on this thread.

I think the studios would probobly make more money if they rereleased the original instead of wasting the money to remake it.

*chuckle* The thing's raking in more dough than Krap Bill Vol. 1 (sorry guys, its official, word of mouth for TCM has been more positive than KB) but the original TCM would be making more money than both of them. I love it. You should be working for MGM.

 

[John Crichton]

*chuckle* The thing's raking in more dough than Krap Bill Vol. 1 (sorry guys, its official, word of mouth for TCM has been more positive than KB) but the original TCM would be making more money than both of them. I love it. You should be working for MGM.

Well, TCM is a horror movie, smartly released in October. It is doing the numbers that it should.

Also, it has not made more than KB yet. KB is about 9 million ahead but has been out for one more week. Also, as of right now TCM is playing on twice as many screens. I couldn't care less about what does better numbers, I just wanted to point it out. I never route for a movie to be bad. I loved KB. If TCM is just as good or better than that is good news for me as I have another good movie to watch.

 

[Kai Lord]

Well, TCM is a horror movie, smartly released in October. It is doing the numbers that it should.

Also, it has not made more than KB yet.

No, but its second weekend take was higher than KB's second weekend, the best judge of first weekend word of mouth. TCM dropped 47% for its second weekend compared to KB's 53%.

KB is about 9 million ahead but has been out for one more week.

Again, no. KB's currently sitting at 53 million, TCM at 51. A difference of only two million dollars even with a full week more for the greatly hyped KB. Check it out:

http://www.boxofficemojo.com/weekend/chart/?yr=2003&wknd=43&p=.htm

Also, as of right now TCM is playing on twice as many screens.

Wrong again, my young apprentice. KB: 2,633 screens. TCM: 3,018 screens. Last weekend KB was even on more than TCM.

If TCM is just as good or better than that is good news for me as I have another good movie to watch.

Check it out. If you don't like it or its not your cup of tea, at least I can respect that as opposed to blind Ebert lemmingism.

 

[John Crichton]

No, but its second weekend take was higher than KB's second weekend, the best judge of first weekend word of mouth.

By 2 mil. No big whoop. I will also say again - it is a horror film out in October. It should do at least marginally well.

Again, no. KB's currently sitting at 53 million, TCM at 51. A difference of only two million dollars even with a full week more for the greatly hyped KB. Check it out:

http://www.boxofficemojo.com/weekend/chart/?yr=2003&wknd=43&p=.htm

Ah, I did not see the whole weekend's numbers. I need better links evidently.

Also, I didn't think KB was all that hyped. I didn't see a ton of commercials for it nor was the ad campaign huge. It's doing what I thought it would do for a QT flick. Actually, your link shows that TCM had twice as much advertising than its production costs compared to KB's which had none. heheh

That can't be right (for KB). I'd be interested in seeing what the ad budget was for KB.

Wrong again, my young apprentice. KB: 2,633 screens. TCM: 3,018 screens. Last weekend KB was even on more than TCM.

Oop. Was looking at last week's numbers again. My bad. http://imdb.com/Charts/usboxlast

Check it out. If you don't like it or its not your cup of tea, at least I can respect that as opposed to blind Ebert lemmingism.

I would never disreguard a film based on one man's opinion, no matter how much I respect him. I don't even give family or friends that much power. If I want to see a film, I'll see it.

But this one will be a renter/cable viewer simply because my next few weeks are already booked. But I do have to say: It will have to be one helluva movie to be as good as you claim. I really dug KB.

 

[nHammer]

Good thing you're not one of those stupid people. Now you get to spend your free time expressing a meaningless opinion on a movie. You haven't. Seen. Care to give your review of The Last Samurai? I know it hasn't been finished and no one has seen it yet, but since that isn't a prerequisite for you I'd love to hear your thoughts. Ditto for anyone else who's panned TCM on this thread

You're right I'm not one of the people stupid enough to see the movie. Too bad you were. Be condescending all you want, fact is Hollywood will keep making and remaking the same old sh*t as long as there are fools, such as yourself, who support it.

 

[Kai Lord]

But this one will be a renter/cable viewer simply because my next few weeks are already booked. But I do have to say: It will have to be one helluva movie to be as good as you claim. I really dug KB.

Well, like Roger, I can only relay my own opinion as well. It definitely isn't scary in the "turn all the lights on in your house when you get home" kind of way, but its VERY intense. And even though its an obvious remake of the original, the formula for this one is actually more evocative of Aliens, if that's your cup of tea.

Like Aliens, it starts with a drifter who survived the monster being picked up, the good guys wanting to take the survivor back, an evil "corporation" of sorts that the protagonists go to for help but actually just wants to cultivate the monster, a "kill me" sequence, and a couple other parallels that would be a little too spoiler intensive to reveal. But yep, very similar to Aliens.

In some ways TCM is even better at maintaining its intensity, because at no point does Jessica Biel suck it up and "go Rambo" like Sigourney Weaver at the end, instead everything she does she does out of shear desperation and terror. So in that sense its closer to the original Alien. But it has the juggernaut elements of the original Terminator as well, I don't know, I've just never experienced visceral thrills like the Alien or Terminator films in a slasher flick before.

But the characters don't have a protector from the future or a company of marines to defend them, and you have the "inspired by actual human psychosis" element reminding you that you can't write the whole thing off as something that could never happen (freakishly unlikely, but possible nonetheless). Throw in some great cinematography, fine supporting performances, and, well, Jessica Biel. Just a cool, well done movie.

I'm not saying its better than Terminator or Aliens or anything; cyborgs and sleek black aliens will always be cooler than inbred hillbillies, but they did do a really good job, and its the first slasher flick that I might actually pick up when it hits DVD.

And if anyone's keeping score, I've seen four of the "Halloween" films, five or six "Friday the 13th" films, half the "Nightmare on Elm Street" movies, all three "Scream's", both "I Know What You Did Last Summer's", and "Urban Legend." Of all of them, the first Halloween, the first Nightmare on Elm Street, and the first Scream are the only movies I would actually consider "good." The new TCM beats all three by a longshot.

 

[Kai Lord]

You're right I'm not one of the people stupid enough to see the movie. Too bad you were. Be condescending all you want, fact is Hollywood will keep making and remaking the same old sh*t as long as there are fools, such as yourself, who support it.

What a silly, silly sentiment. Lord of the Rings is the "same old sh*t", huh? Or how about the original Matrix, or Spider-Man, or Memento, or Moulin Rouge? You have no idea what you're talking about. The best horror/suspense film of the last 29 years ("The Ring") was a remake. Insomnia was a remake. True Lies was a remake. Vanilla Sky was a remake. Get a clue, dude. Your oh so discriminating attitude isn't impressing anybody.