Dire Bare
Legend
Oh, I agree. A lot of what folks in this thread have called out certainly represent some recurring problems in discussion, formal or otherwise. But I'm also seeing a few folks taking things too far (not many, but some).
False dichotomies and other fallacies RPGers use
- Thread starter blargney the second
- Start date
Oh, I agree. A lot of what folks in this thread have called out certainly represent some recurring problems in discussion, formal or otherwise. But I'm also seeing a few folks taking things too far (not many, but some).
The "that's a fallacy" fallacy, i.e. calling something a fallacy when it isn't. Example: see above.
pawsplay
Hero
Strangely, not only is this allowed on theRPGsite, it's almost required, like how jocks are required to punch each other and pat each other on the butt and so forth.
Jack7
First Post
I'm not sure if these have been stated before, as these are a lot of pages to wade through at 2 in the morning. But I've enjoyed what I have read, and laughed at some of them. I'm also not sure my entries are all fallacies, per se, (exactly what you're looking for in this thread). But they can certainly be false assumptions of a kind.
Ad Infinitum, or No Mas/No Mas: If I argue until the other guy gives up or has no more time to continue then I win by virtue of the fact that he ran out of time or interest. With practice and nothing better to do I can eventually win all of my arguments in this way.
Non, et Non: No reasoning on your part will force me to reconsider the validity of my argument (or yours), and conceding any part of your argument in some way endangers all of my argument. Therefore nothing you say will endanger my line of non-reasoning. There's just no reason for it.
Argumentum Bonum: I like a good argument, therefore I will find something to argue about your point, even if it is tangential, or if I am the only one reading it this way. If I can't find something to disagree with, then I'll invent something.
Expertus Maximus: I've won other similar arguments, therefore I've won this one... when will you learn?
Squirtus Maximus: Watch my emotions torrent in a squirty stream of illogic which is nonetheless devastatingly passionate. Therefore, I win. I just feel more deeply about it than you do.
Ass-umptus Maximus: You didn't really say this (or that), but I'm assuming it's obviously what you meant, and even if I could easily verify your real point by asking you a few simple questions, it's just more fun to argue my assumption than the exactness of your point. Assumptions are fun after all!
When you Win/Wins: I won this argument on the basis of the fact that I decided I won, therefore, you win by virtue of the fact that you were able to bask in the glory of my winitude. It's a win/win for everyone, you pathetic Loser!
Misunderstandus Inexplicipus: For some inexplicable reason I cannot yet fathom your point, and so therefore, since you didn't make it plain enough, your reasoning is naturally faulty. (You failed to communicate in such a way that I could easily understand you, therefore, you must be an idiot!)
Tourette's Argument (from design): What a $*!+-faced @$$ u must be in real life. You must be some kinda moron who is hated by everyone you know, so, you lose! (This is a big problem on the internet since it has been statistically proven that users of the internet suffer from Tourette's Argument Fallacy at a rate of 1000 times that of the general population. Reason's unknown, but probably deducible.)
Familiaris Internetus (or, I Know You Through the Aether): I know all about you and your kind that I need to know through the internet. Therefore I know you and what you really meant, and who and what you really are. See, I'm brilliant like that.
Meekus Squeakus: I think this way, therefore everyone thinks this way, and if they don't then they obviously haven't had the advantage of thinking like me.
Politicus Correctimus: Every argument in the end is surely a political one, and trust me, my politics are far more evolved and sophisticated than yours. Therefore, I win!
Wishful Blissful: My one wish is that you realize how stupid you are, cause if you realized how stupid you are then you'd realize how stupid I think you are. And then we could share that in common. (Translation: you're not nearly as smart as I obviously think I am, so when are you gonna figure that out already? What, do I just have to keep telling ya over and over again.)
Invisiblus Ironicus: You and I both understand the irony of what I am saying, but if I close my eyes hard enough, it never happened, and so you won't notice either.
Singularis Unum (aka, My Psychic Crush on Myself): I'm the only one who really understands the brilliance of what I am saying. So no matter how fragile my position may be, secretly, and deep inside, I've already won in my own mind. If only more people could understand this instinctively, it would be a far better world.
Invictus Indubilus: The point of every argument is to vanquish the enemy, to hear the lamentations of the women, to curse the dark ignorance of the foe, to conquer all opposition and doubt, to lay low the adversary. We do not debate to discover truth, we argue to crush the fool who dares to question me! (The internet is not for fun, or a place to pursue your interests, or to have stimulating, fruitful debates, it is a place to prove what a fool the other guy must be for messin with me.)
The Masterbaiter: Yes, deep down I understand exactly what you mean and probably agree, but let me rebait your argument in a totally different way so as to draw in someone else who I know will open this thing up like unholy hell on a hotplate.
Terminus Idioticus: Look there you idiot, you misused or misspelled a term in some way. Therefore everything else you say is stupid! Therefore I win, you maroon!
Victory by Fanbase: The obvious truth of my argument is proven by the fact of my dedicated fanbase. If you had a fanbase then it could fight mine, but you don't, so, you lose again!
Web of Allusions: Look, I've said this on the internet (or seen it said) a thousand times. By now it must be true!
Ad Infinitum, or No Mas/No Mas: If I argue until the other guy gives up or has no more time to continue then I win by virtue of the fact that he ran out of time or interest. With practice and nothing better to do I can eventually win all of my arguments in this way.
Non, et Non: No reasoning on your part will force me to reconsider the validity of my argument (or yours), and conceding any part of your argument in some way endangers all of my argument. Therefore nothing you say will endanger my line of non-reasoning. There's just no reason for it.
Argumentum Bonum: I like a good argument, therefore I will find something to argue about your point, even if it is tangential, or if I am the only one reading it this way. If I can't find something to disagree with, then I'll invent something.
Expertus Maximus: I've won other similar arguments, therefore I've won this one... when will you learn?
Squirtus Maximus: Watch my emotions torrent in a squirty stream of illogic which is nonetheless devastatingly passionate. Therefore, I win. I just feel more deeply about it than you do.
Ass-umptus Maximus: You didn't really say this (or that), but I'm assuming it's obviously what you meant, and even if I could easily verify your real point by asking you a few simple questions, it's just more fun to argue my assumption than the exactness of your point. Assumptions are fun after all!
When you Win/Wins: I won this argument on the basis of the fact that I decided I won, therefore, you win by virtue of the fact that you were able to bask in the glory of my winitude. It's a win/win for everyone, you pathetic Loser!
Misunderstandus Inexplicipus: For some inexplicable reason I cannot yet fathom your point, and so therefore, since you didn't make it plain enough, your reasoning is naturally faulty. (You failed to communicate in such a way that I could easily understand you, therefore, you must be an idiot!)
Tourette's Argument (from design): What a $*!+-faced @$$ u must be in real life. You must be some kinda moron who is hated by everyone you know, so, you lose! (This is a big problem on the internet since it has been statistically proven that users of the internet suffer from Tourette's Argument Fallacy at a rate of 1000 times that of the general population. Reason's unknown, but probably deducible.)
Familiaris Internetus (or, I Know You Through the Aether): I know all about you and your kind that I need to know through the internet. Therefore I know you and what you really meant, and who and what you really are. See, I'm brilliant like that.
Meekus Squeakus: I think this way, therefore everyone thinks this way, and if they don't then they obviously haven't had the advantage of thinking like me.
Politicus Correctimus: Every argument in the end is surely a political one, and trust me, my politics are far more evolved and sophisticated than yours. Therefore, I win!
Wishful Blissful: My one wish is that you realize how stupid you are, cause if you realized how stupid you are then you'd realize how stupid I think you are. And then we could share that in common. (Translation: you're not nearly as smart as I obviously think I am, so when are you gonna figure that out already? What, do I just have to keep telling ya over and over again.)
Invisiblus Ironicus: You and I both understand the irony of what I am saying, but if I close my eyes hard enough, it never happened, and so you won't notice either.
Singularis Unum (aka, My Psychic Crush on Myself): I'm the only one who really understands the brilliance of what I am saying. So no matter how fragile my position may be, secretly, and deep inside, I've already won in my own mind. If only more people could understand this instinctively, it would be a far better world.
Invictus Indubilus: The point of every argument is to vanquish the enemy, to hear the lamentations of the women, to curse the dark ignorance of the foe, to conquer all opposition and doubt, to lay low the adversary. We do not debate to discover truth, we argue to crush the fool who dares to question me! (The internet is not for fun, or a place to pursue your interests, or to have stimulating, fruitful debates, it is a place to prove what a fool the other guy must be for messin with me.)
The Masterbaiter: Yes, deep down I understand exactly what you mean and probably agree, but let me rebait your argument in a totally different way so as to draw in someone else who I know will open this thing up like unholy hell on a hotplate.
Terminus Idioticus: Look there you idiot, you misused or misspelled a term in some way. Therefore everything else you say is stupid! Therefore I win, you maroon!
Victory by Fanbase: The obvious truth of my argument is proven by the fact of my dedicated fanbase. If you had a fanbase then it could fight mine, but you don't, so, you lose again!
Web of Allusions: Look, I've said this on the internet (or seen it said) a thousand times. By now it must be true!
Last edited:
Jdvn1
Hanging in there. Better than the alternative.
I wonder how many people are like me and learned this from West Wing.
Jack7
First Post
+1 Funny. I lol'ed at several of those.
Glad you liked em. I forgot a few though as it was so late (or early).
Inventiarabilis: Invented evidence and the internet go together like enchanted unicorn glitter horn and golden globet chimera spoor. Therefore, when all else fails, let's get inventive!
Optimus Toolerus (aka, I'm a Power Tool): By using a clever combination of all available fallacies and assumptions that it is possible to interject into a single argument all at once I can totally optimize my overall Tooliness. I'm maximized! That makes me the kind of Winner I was born to be...
And this one isn't really a method for winning an argument on the internet (or anywhere else for that matter), or effectively arguing a dubious position, but it does happen a lot. And I admit I'm a big offender in this regard.
Microsofticus: If you use any Microsoft product as a text editor when on the internet then your argument suffers a natural and inherent grammar and spelling penalty of -3. Yes, Microsoft is fast and conveniently effective, but then again so is an e-coli infection, and sooner or later Microsofticus will damage your argumentary canal.
Cosmological Argument
1. I say that something must have cause, so it must have a cause
2. I say that 4e must have a cause
3. Therefore 4e must exist
Ontological Argument
1. I define 4e to be X
2. Since I can conceive of x, x must exist
3. Therefore, 4e exists.
Ontological Argument 2
1 I can conceive of a perfect game.
2 One of the qualities of perfection is existence.
3 Therefore, 4e exists.
ARGUMENT FROM MIRACLES
1 My aunt had cancer.
2 The doctors gave her all these horrible treatments.
3 My aunt played 4e and now she doesn't have cancer.
4 Therefore, 4e exists.
MORAL ARGUMENT
1 In my younger days I was a cursing, drinking, smoking, gambling, child-molesting, thieving, murdering, bed-wetting bastard.
2 That all changed once I played 4e.
3 Therefore, 4e exists.
ARGUMENT FROM INTELLIGENCE
1 Look, there's really no point in me trying to explain the whole thing to you; it's too complicated for you to understand. 4e exists whether you like it or not.
2 Therefore, 4e exists.
ARGUMENT FROM NUMBERS
1 Billions of people play 4e.
2 They can't all be wrong, can they?
3 Therefore, 4e exists.
ARGUMENT FROM INCOMPREHENSIBILITY
1 Flabble glurk zoom boink blubba snurgleschnortz ping!
2 No one has ever refuted me
3 Therefore, 4e exists.
ARGUMENT FROM SMUGNESS
1 4e exists.
2 I don't give a crap whether you believe it or not; I have better things to do than to try to convince you morons.
3 Therefore, 4e exists.
1. I say that something must have cause, so it must have a cause
2. I say that 4e must have a cause
3. Therefore 4e must exist
Ontological Argument
1. I define 4e to be X
2. Since I can conceive of x, x must exist
3. Therefore, 4e exists.
Ontological Argument 2
1 I can conceive of a perfect game.
2 One of the qualities of perfection is existence.
3 Therefore, 4e exists.
ARGUMENT FROM MIRACLES
1 My aunt had cancer.
2 The doctors gave her all these horrible treatments.
3 My aunt played 4e and now she doesn't have cancer.
4 Therefore, 4e exists.
MORAL ARGUMENT
1 In my younger days I was a cursing, drinking, smoking, gambling, child-molesting, thieving, murdering, bed-wetting bastard.
2 That all changed once I played 4e.
3 Therefore, 4e exists.
ARGUMENT FROM INTELLIGENCE
1 Look, there's really no point in me trying to explain the whole thing to you; it's too complicated for you to understand. 4e exists whether you like it or not.
2 Therefore, 4e exists.
ARGUMENT FROM NUMBERS
1 Billions of people play 4e.
2 They can't all be wrong, can they?
3 Therefore, 4e exists.
ARGUMENT FROM INCOMPREHENSIBILITY
1 Flabble glurk zoom boink blubba snurgleschnortz ping!
2 No one has ever refuted me
3 Therefore, 4e exists.
ARGUMENT FROM SMUGNESS
1 4e exists.
2 I don't give a crap whether you believe it or not; I have better things to do than to try to convince you morons.
3 Therefore, 4e exists.
And the resultant form:
Never Give Up, Never Surrender: The other guy wins if you give up or have no more time to continue, so you hang on well past the point where even you yourself feel there is anything to be gained, but you can't let the other guy win by default.
Similar Threads
