For DMs: Ticked off players and funky d20's

[Arnwyn]

This guy's 'love' for that particular set of dice is really creepy - too creepy for my personal taste.

Not sure if you could've done much differently, except maybe broach the subject face-to-face with everyone instead of email... but hindsight is 20/20 (who knew that a comment about dice would cause someone to act so deranged?).

 

[Calico_Jack73]

Now it has gotten better...

In one of his responses he said that he most likely would drop out of gaming when I am running the game. I replied that if anyone was going to leave it'd be me since I am the "New Guy" and I didn't want the group to resent a new guy for coming in and causing so much trouble that one of their existing members to leave. I thought that would go over pretty well... guess what, it didn't.

Now he is saying that I am out to make him the "Bad Guy" and the scape goat if I leave the group. Geez... there is just no pleasing some people. At least that reply was less hostile than some of the others.

 

[BSF]

Boy, he is crying up a river isn't he?

Effectively you called his bluff when he pouted that he would leave because he can't use his favorite dice. Hey, I like the gamescience dice as well. But they were always hard to read if you don't color them in.

 

[Oryan77]

He might be more upset that you need to double check his rolls rather than take his word for it. He might not have ever had a DM question his rolls, so you're insulting him now. It's just a thought.

I wouldn't have even said anything to anyone about it. If it bothered you, you should've just kept track of his rolls for a session or two and see how often he rolled good. Then if it seemed fishy, ask a player to help keep an eye on his rolls so you can know for sure if you're just being paranoid. If the other player sees he's cheating, ask him to mention it after the guy cheats on a roll. You are the newer one in the group, it might be better if another player brought it up and you backed him up. Then just ask him to use different dice, "Once you're caught cheating in my game, you don't get a choice which dice you get to use".

It's not socially good to accuse people or show distrust right off the bat. People get offended whether or not they are cheating. It would suck to lose a player who wasn't cheating but is annoyed that you wouldn't trust him.

 

[Kae'Yoss]

Now it has gotten better...

In one of his responses he said that he most likely would drop out of gaming when I am running the game. I replied that if anyone was going to leave it'd be me since I am the "New Guy" and I didn't want the group to resent a new guy for coming in and causing so much trouble that one of their existing members to leave. I thought that would go over pretty well... guess what, it didn't.

Now he is saying that I am out to make him the "Bad Guy" and the scape goat if I leave the group. Geez... there is just no pleasing some people. At least that reply was less hostile than some of the others.

Bah, good riddance to him. I'm sure the others will understand. They may also interfere and talk to the guy, since they will probably know him better and understand why he does it. Just talk to the others about it.

He might be more upset that you need to double check his rolls rather than take his word for it. He might not have ever had a DM question his rolls, so you're insulting him now. It's just a thought.

Except that he didn't really do that. He said he wanted to have dice where you can read the numbers clearly.

Personally, I would understand it. It isn't necessarily an accusation. It just might bother the DM to not see it (and he likes to see the roll right away, not waiting for and hearing only the final result).

Even when I felt insulted, I'd go about it more calmly, first asking what the intention behind it was. Behaviour like this is suspect, if you ask me.

 

[Parlan]

I agree that the reaction is suspicious, but I'm not convinced the dude is cheating yet. That's a SERIOUS accusation that I feel I need to see personally or have on GOOD authority.

One more tack to try (which you might have already tried):

The "I'm Sorry, I'm Neurotic" Approach. (OK, it sounds a little nuts, just give it a chance)

Just say, look, I know you're attached to those dice and stuff and I certainly don't want you to think that I'm accusing you of anything, but I've just had a couple of previous players who gave me a really bad association with those dice. Now, everytime I see them when I'm running a game, it's a major distraction for me. So, I'm sorry I'm a little neurotic here, but could you just use a standard D20 in my games, for my sanity?

And if he does sit out a session or two, I'd mention the reason why to the other players. Ask them if they thought your request was unreasonable.

 

[smootrk]

I say let him go. The others in your group probably already know his habits, but they just don't say anything. They may very well get behind your stance. If they actively want or encourage an atmosphere of 'cheat if you want to'... they probably are not the group for you.

Take control and set up your own group. Allow members of that group to join if they want to, but ultimately you will have the control over the rules and membership.

 

[Silverleaf]

There's only one way to handle this: pistols at dawn!
Alternately, you could buy a bunch of jumbo-size d20's and make all your players roll those instead of their own.

 

[Oryan77]

Except that he didn't really do that. He said he wanted to have dice where you can read the numbers clearly.

I would take that as another way of politely saying, "Even though you might not be cheating; you could easily cheat with those dice. Just to be safe, I'd rather not risk it, so can you use different dice?" It's about trust, and the DM doesn't trust him with those dice. That could be insulting to this guy.

I'm not saying the DM is wrong for not trusting him. I might do the same thing if he always rolled well. But I would have investigated it more before confronting him. I pride myself on being honest. If I had a pair of "lucky" dice and the DM didn't trust me to use them, I could possibly feel insulted. It would be a slam to my pride and I would be wondering why this DM doesn't trust me as a player the way I trust him as a DM. I'm not a freak about what dice I use though; I'm just looking at this from another perspective.

My players use tiny dice and hard to read dice. I trust them to be honest. I don't care to look at their rolls. I just want them to read them to me. Like I said, if I had suspicions of cheating, THEN I would start watching rolls & asking players to keep an eye out before I talked to the player. I've done this exact thing before and it turned out that she wasn't cheating; she just had a really good game that night. I'm pretty sure if I just questioned her or made subtle hints that I think she might be cheating (asking her to use different dice) then she probably would have gotten upset.

 

[Whimsical]

Okay, this guy is pulling out all of the manipulative tricks he knows to get to you back down. He's using Intimidation, Bluff, and otherwise undermining your right as a DM and attacking your confidence to run your own game.

What I would do is call or meet with each other player individually and explain the situation (because I bet you that he is doing the same thing.) Ask them if what you have done is unreasonable. I bet you that you will get a story from other players on how he has intimidated the other DM to allow him to keep using that die, or you will find out that other players also have their suspicions. Ask them what they would do if they were DMing and they were uncomfortable with how a person was generating their die rolls. Ask them what you should do, and inform them that this is an issue that they guy will not let go and will probably work very hard to destroy the enjoyment of the game for everyone else if he doesn't get his way. But if he gets his way, then you have essentially allowed a bully to rule the group. Ask them if it is OK with them for this guy to rule them.

There's a certain amount of respect that a DM needs to function as a DM. Although it is good to incorporate player feedback into your game, you have the final say in what goes or doesn't go.

So there are a few of ways that this could go. You could run your game and he would use his die. You could run your game with him using a differnt die (and probably poisoning the environment.) You could run your game without him (thus completing his plan of making YOU the "bad guy".) You could choose to not run you game and keep playing. Or you can leave that group and start a new group with selected invited players from that group. Or you can leave entirely.

Before you choose to give in or not run your game. Check to see how the other players would like things to go.

One other thing, if you let him use his die, you can keep track of the die rolls, then use them for his opponents' rolls.