Funny RP moments

[Lerris]

Some from our long running Shadowrun campain first a brief idea of our party:

Me, Serin Terital, an Elf face chracter and also the best shot in the team.

Aron (something), A dwarven wise arse Decker, who also attempts to steal cyberwhere of those we kill and sell them.

Tony Khan, A human Physical Adept, unable to read or write but also a wheretiger the rest of us don't know this though.

Mirth Khan, no relation to Tony, a troll street tough(played by Ian from most of my other tales.)

Ren (something), A troll mage, has a strange thing with killing people but one of our key players.

Stimpy (guy hasn't decided on a name yet he just happens to travel with ren), An elf bodyguard, only played in one session so far so can't say too much more.

In our first assinment I was left behind with our clients in one of my many squats. After a short while I heard movment outside the door, I drew my gun and waited after a while it burst open and there stoood a dozen Yakuzza(I couldn't see them all of course but that was the number.) I shot the two i could see instantly they dropped back i ducked into a doorway to my left and traded fire with them for a while. Took no damage for almost 10 rounds until i was forced to reload my gun our cliant fired twice the first hit tha wall outside the door and teh secound hit me in the back. Just bad shooting my chracter assumed till in the next round i was shot again in the back, I dropped pretending to be dead. Our cliant stood over me and jjust to make sure cocked his gun like they do in the movies. I took my chance raised my own gun and shot twice and killed him I then proceded to kill the rest of my attacker while rolling around on the floor one of deadly. It was as I kille dthe llast one that the girl we were protecting walked by me and outside to be snacthed up by a dragon so glad i didn't hand her over instantly. A few minutes later the rest of my party arrived complaining that I didn't help them at all.

Our DM had just wacthed the entire Matrix trillagy and decided that he'd award us extra karma if we describe things in bullet time, now he deduct's it if we even so much as mentuion bullet and time in the same sentance.

Just a general opinion if you have trolls in your party and there's likly to be explosions stand behind them they take most of the blast. We ened up outside a secure area Ren praised upon the keypad controls and boom. Our other troll was standing ready to grab the gatling gun he was sure would pop out at any minute he was awarded and grabbed instantly, our Dm said h'd need to make a roll of 20 he got 30 he now has his prized gatling gun. He left just after this and we had his chracter just sit there spining the barrel around going "ewwwww".

Same troll he has left the gatling gun behind and was doing recon on a building, decided to kidnap one of it's users so he followe him home asked him questions knocked him sensless went donstairs weher he told the gm that he wanted to carry the guys bike up too the apartment. He was then asked if he though that was wise, he said yes and proceded to do so, he heared and saw a door shut as he looked back. His chracter shrugged and placed the bike in the apartment carried the guy out and too a location waiyted till one of us arrived and then took of to take care of something he said. He arrived back at th apartments and knocked on the door he'd seen close it opend to reveal a lonestar officer another opend a door behind him and a third came down the stairs. A few rounds later a large explosion our troll stumbled from the building deafend and took a varity of shots from a fourth officer he's now been arretsed we've changed our phones and locations and have decided to kill the troll if we get a chance.

Thats all for now there shall be more.

 

[Savage Wombat]

We figure that there is no real way to determine this, but he is insistent that there must be some logical Alice in Wonderland before the Two Doors type question that will determine if the skull is lying.

I think the question you want would be "If I were to ask you if you were lying, what would you say?"

If he always lies, then he'd have to lie about saying "no", thus saying "yes."

A truthteller would still say "no."

Of course, if he can choose whether to lie, you're hosed.

 

[milotha]

I think the question you want would be "If I were to ask you if you were lying, what would you say?"

If he always lies, then he'd have to lie about saying "no", thus saying "yes."

A truthteller would still say "no."

Of course, if he can choose whether to lie, you're hosed.

We asked it a question that indicated that it could tell the truth, so I don't think there was anyway with one skull and a yes/no question that we were going to determine this. Regardless, "Do talking skulls lie" is not very informative.

 

[blargney the second]

A wagon full of halflings careens down a busy city street, a patrol of mounted guards in close pursuit. The city wall looms up before them, crossbow-wielding guards block the way through the slowly lowering portcullis.

One of the halfling yells out in his high-pitched voice, "WE'VE GOT THE PLAGUE!"

To a man, the guards abandon their posts.

-blarg

 

[Lerris]

This happend earlier this week in our D&D game.

Now we have one player that writes everything down he thinks is intresting however this is userally in one word cases so when we glanced at his page and read the word moss we thought nothing of it. The town is palgued by deamons telathere or something with many ' within them

We were sitting around in the tavarn when we heard a scream from outside so Me (a Dwarven Druid), the human fighter and the human Swashbuckler lept to our feet and rushed outside while one of the halfling rouges states taht he makes a listen check. He rolls succeads and is told that he hears footsteps retreating from him and then a door opens the footsteps are now outside.

Upon reaching outside we meet a new party memebr a dwarven cleric and see 6 deamon harassing an old man and child, I cast flare and blind one and then the swashbuckler acts he charges forwards gets told to roll a reflex save does so fails and gets told he slips and slides down the hill too come to a halt next to the besiged pair. He looks at the front of his jacket it is stained green(now we know why there was moss written down the entire streets were paved with it.), but any way we continue to attack all of us manage not to fall over but the swashbuckler is again in trouble he's paralised due to poison from the deamons so the dwarf cleric says he'll help him out he charges forwards fails his reflex roll and sails on by down the street. he never did get back to join the combat.

there was more to this but I just had to write that bit down.

 

[Ghostwalker_Daishi]

Satanists are dangerous for your plot

Ok, basically I am running an evil-aligned group that had just left the mountains where Greg's character just aquired the half-dragon class template. My players keep pestering me for a map of the local area, so I throw one together. Just for a goof I put a notice on the map saying "Avoid Satanists here". 3 of my 4 players laughed and ignored it, but Greg got the bright idea of heading over there. Why, I will never know.

Long story short, some incredibly good Diplomacy rolls were made, some terrible Sense Motive rolls were made by Satanists, and now my evil group has several loyal minions running about setting up cults in local towns.

All this from a spur-of-the-moment joke.

 

[Ell-Egypto]

In our Pathfinder game, we wanted a name for our party.
Several good choices were fielded like the Blue Shields, or
League of Extraordinary Wanderers, or Nephews of Anarchy

but the one that settled was unfortunately: Non-Direction

 

[Ell-Egypto]

Same pathfinder game, the party gets to a city, tracking an expert navigator.
the city is controlled by lizard men who only speak draconic.

this puts the party at the mercy of me, the bard, and the wizard.
the only speakers.
the rest of the group waits at the tavern while we gather info.

the wizard goes to do alchemical research, and gathers no useful info.

the bard mixes around, goes shopping, and presses the flesh.
I find out the governor is having a magic edifice built,
and that our navigator is being executed tomorrow at noon at the town square.

What I the Bard told the party was that there was a show tomorrow noon downtown
and we should get there by 11:15 so we can get good seats and some lunch.

So when we get there the party figures it out and starts ranting at me.

We hatch up a plan, me and the cleric will go into the jail, bluffing that
the prisoner needs last rites in his own religion. Easy enough. we're in the cell with our navigator.

Now what ? Well.... the navigator and I swapped clothes and 2 disguise checks later,
the cleric and navigator have escaped. Now What ?!?

The DM took great delight in describing the ceremonial axe that the huge lizard man had ready.

long story short: the party had to pull a robin hood rescue and get me off the scaffolding the hard way.
fighting through the guards and out of town...

 

[Zanshin]

We asked it a question that indicated that it could tell the truth, so I don't think there was anyway with one skull and a yes/no question that we were going to determine this. Regardless, "Do talking skulls lie" is not very informative.

If this is two guardians (one a liar, one a truthsayer) the question is 'Which door would the other guardian say is safe?'

Either way they will point to the door of death, so you take the other door.