hellbender
First Post
Angcuru said:
RAISINS DON'T HAVE LEGS! RAISINS DON'T HAVE LEGS! THAT'S NOT RIGHT! THAT'S NOT RIGHT!
I couldn't help it, and I found the winking emoticon at the end of Jemal's statement a bit.........unsettling.
h
Gamers who want to date gamers
- Thread starter Romus
- Start date
I couldn't help it, and I found the winking emoticon at the end of Jemal's statement a bit.........unsettling.
h
BOZ
Creature Cataloguer
you might not have that much luck looking for a "gamer grrrl" - these women are used to being hit on by any number of HNG's, and will probably be very resistant to you unless you really impress one somehow. you'll have much better luck looking for a girl who is at least open to the idea of such things. i met my fiancee (two months left till the big day, woohoo!) on yahoo personals, and when i wrote out my ad i made sure to put in all the geekly things i'm into - that way i wouldn't be rejected for them later. 
my wife-to-be may not be into all of those things, but has at least sampled them and not found all of them to be distasteful. 
she's not a gamer, but will play with me if i ask her to, which is good enough for me. 
my wife-to-be may not be into all of those things, but has at least sampled them and not found all of them to be distasteful. she's not a gamer, but will play with me if i ask her to, which is good enough for me. 
I actually met my wife because I'm a gamer. She was a friend of my college roommate and while I knew her, I didn't talk to her much as she was generally over to see him. I came home one day to find my roommate on the phone and her thumbing through my PHB. She explained that she used to play, but it had been awhile and then asked if she could join my group. After recovering from the initial shock (first female gamer I'd met) I agreed, 6 months later we were dating, 18 months after that we were married. She doesn't play so much anymore, though she fully supports me in my hobby and has mentioned a number of times if I was going to teach our son (at only 11 months old I've got some time).
I'm lucky, I married someone that enjoys one of my hobbies and is supportive of my habit, even if she no longer plays. I know a fellow gamer (got me introduced to my current group) who married a woman that despises gaming. Needless to say, he is no longer with the group. Find someone that supports you (regardless of your hobby), if they are a gamer, so much the better.
I'm lucky, I married someone that enjoys one of my hobbies and is supportive of my habit, even if she no longer plays. I know a fellow gamer (got me introduced to my current group) who married a woman that despises gaming. Needless to say, he is no longer with the group. Find someone that supports you (regardless of your hobby), if they are a gamer, so much the better.
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[Edit: My attempt to put another perspective on the thread topic has resulted in a completely biased reply that contributes nothing to little to the discussion. I apologize for my remarks regarding this issue. I hope that there are no hard feelings. I hope you understand my point of view and that anyone who was offended can forgive me.]
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Well, Illrein, you already identified that you were a misogynist so there's no point in me really confirming that yes you are. What I find particularly amazing in your rant is the fact that you blame women who don't appear, even by your own description, to be doing anything wrong for how men irrationally react to them. You might have been well situated to work for the Taliban given your apparent desire to blame women not only for their behaviour but for now men behave near them.
That said, I have been part of some RP social dynamics that were exclusively male; I recall our Champions group stunning our GM, Teflon Billy, when we stated that we liked the particular all male group dynamic and didn't really want a female player to be added. So, I think there is a place for excluding women from games on the basis of gender but that doesn't mean that they should be blamed for how their mere presence will alter others' behaviour.
That said, I have been part of some RP social dynamics that were exclusively male; I recall our Champions group stunning our GM, Teflon Billy, when we stated that we liked the particular all male group dynamic and didn't really want a female player to be added. So, I think there is a place for excluding women from games on the basis of gender but that doesn't mean that they should be blamed for how their mere presence will alter others' behaviour.
splitinfinitude
First Post
Rant response -
Sorry to hear about your bad experiences. That sounds awful.
I, on the other hand, like female gamers. I don't find that female gamers are any more or less likely than males to have temper tantrums, be difficult, refuse to get along, or try to manipulate the DM. IMO, we men just put up with it from other men (boys will be boys) but get upset when women just play the game. BTW, I have never run across the "girls always want to talk to things" stereotype (most of the women gamers I know play barbarians or stealing, backstabbing rogues).
Back on topic -
I married a gamer girl, although when we started dating, I have to admit I hid my gaming dark side for awhile. Turned out she had one of the original D&D sets her mom had got for her way back when, a dog-eared basic rules and about 10 characters she'd started but never had a chance to play. She's been gaming ever since, even though I have killed her PC's at least a dozen times. Most girl gamers I know aren't interested in dating the guys she games with. If you can ask her out w/o making a big deal about it, so the game can go on, I say go for it.
Sorry to hear about your bad experiences. That sounds awful.
I, on the other hand, like female gamers. I don't find that female gamers are any more or less likely than males to have temper tantrums, be difficult, refuse to get along, or try to manipulate the DM. IMO, we men just put up with it from other men (boys will be boys) but get upset when women just play the game. BTW, I have never run across the "girls always want to talk to things" stereotype (most of the women gamers I know play barbarians or stealing, backstabbing rogues).
Back on topic -
I married a gamer girl, although when we started dating, I have to admit I hid my gaming dark side for awhile. Turned out she had one of the original D&D sets her mom had got for her way back when, a dog-eared basic rules and about 10 characters she'd started but never had a chance to play. She's been gaming ever since, even though I have killed her PC's at least a dozen times. Most girl gamers I know aren't interested in dating the guys she games with. If you can ask her out w/o making a big deal about it, so the game can go on, I say go for it.
Well, I have had pleasant and unpleasant experiences with "both sides of the coin" gaming and nongaming women.
Perhaps the worst situation was the girl who pretended to like gaming until she decided it was time for me to "grow up" and out of gaming ... after she married me.
Ironicaly, years after she said, "Now, you know that in the real world people won't be playing these games." I keep finding lots of people who have, or at least give gamers the benefit of the doubt. On the other hand, I work in a office, so I keep my gaming to myself so as not to be judged.
I have my best results with women who had interests similar to gaming. People who like fantasy/SF/horror fiction or movies. I am also a writer by trade, and there are women who like a creative guy, the more creative the more "intellegent and exotic."
My suggestion:
You should, however, expand your definition of "gaming stuff." Get out and join some book or poetry clubs.
I have also heard that places like Barnes and Noble and Borders have become discretee weekend pick-up places for people with an intellectual bent. While I haven't personal verified this, I took a date to such a store on the weekend and it was amazing how many women were dressed to the nines just to find a book. I also suggest that you don't overlook "mundane" women for the sake of a "perfect gaming girl." It is possible to arrange a comprimise where your gaming is basicly "guy time." Most good women realize this let it go. The women who have a problem with such a concept would have similar problems with football and such.
Perhaps the worst situation was the girl who pretended to like gaming until she decided it was time for me to "grow up" and out of gaming ... after she married me.
Ironicaly, years after she said, "Now, you know that in the real world people won't be playing these games." I keep finding lots of people who have, or at least give gamers the benefit of the doubt. On the other hand, I work in a office, so I keep my gaming to myself so as not to be judged.
I have my best results with women who had interests similar to gaming. People who like fantasy/SF/horror fiction or movies. I am also a writer by trade, and there are women who like a creative guy, the more creative the more "intellegent and exotic."
My suggestion:
You should, however, expand your definition of "gaming stuff." Get out and join some book or poetry clubs.
I have also heard that places like Barnes and Noble and Borders have become discretee weekend pick-up places for people with an intellectual bent. While I haven't personal verified this, I took a date to such a store on the weekend and it was amazing how many women were dressed to the nines just to find a book. I also suggest that you don't overlook "mundane" women for the sake of a "perfect gaming girl." It is possible to arrange a comprimise where your gaming is basicly "guy time." Most good women realize this let it go. The women who have a problem with such a concept would have similar problems with football and such.
my ideal girl doesn't game
... but she as heck better be a closet computer geek. Hahahah! Anyway, gamer or non-gamer doesn't matter to me as long as she can have a good conversation about 'geeky' topics. No I don't mean Star Trek or the latest Anime, I'm referring to history, politics, and religion. She must at least have a passing interest in the ancient Celts, Romans, Greeks, or any other ancient time period.
Any other geeky quality is just icing on the cake.
... but she as heck better be a closet computer geek. Hahahah! Anyway, gamer or non-gamer doesn't matter to me as long as she can have a good conversation about 'geeky' topics. No I don't mean Star Trek or the latest Anime, I'm referring to history, politics, and religion. She must at least have a passing interest in the ancient Celts, Romans, Greeks, or any other ancient time period.
Any other geeky quality is just icing on the cake.
Henry
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MODERATORLY WORD OF WARNING:
If this thread is to remain open to discussion, I need to remind all about not only being civil, but also to remind everyone about the "Morrus' Grandmother Rule" (contained in the site's FAQ.) I have nothing against honest discussion, but let's keep it within policy, please.
Thanks to all for listening.
If this thread is to remain open to discussion, I need to remind all about not only being civil, but also to remind everyone about the "Morrus' Grandmother Rule" (contained in the site's FAQ.) I have nothing against honest discussion, but let's keep it within policy, please.
Thanks to all for listening.
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