Gaming and your Significant Other

[The_Universe]

My wife and I both play - or rather I GM (most of the time) and she plays. I've had Significant Other's that didn't game, and it was always a sticking point - it's something I'm really glad that my wife and I now have in common.

Honestly, though - as long as your SO is cool with it, there's nothing wrong with playing when he/she does not.

 

[Umbran]

I met my wife when she showed up to play in a D&D game I was running. 'Nuff said.

 

[Treebore]

I managed to get my wife to play d20 Modern by tapping her interest in shows like The X-Files, Millenium, and Alias, and she's enjoyed it very much - right up until I killed her character a couple of weeks ago.

:\

This is her first character death - she's not taking it well.

Killing your SO's character is a very dangerous maneuver. Goodluck!

As for my SO, she once tried to make me stop gaming about 7 years ago (we've been married over 14 years now), I told her there is the door, literally. Here we are about 7 years later and she games occasionally, plays GURPS which our neighbor down the street GM's every Saturday in fact. I play and DM on alternating Saturdays over at one of the groups house, well actually two since they are married and both play. Plus I play in the GURPS game with my SO. My SO also likes to play in my Traveller games when I DM them. Sometimes she will DM a 2E D&D game for my kids and I to play.

So we had our difficult time, but once she got it that I married her to be her husband and not her dedicated slave for her to rule over, she has been great. In fact, the only time we have problems now is when her dog shows interfere with my gaming schedule.

Luckily the next show this coming weekend is at 8 AM and is only an hour away on Saturday, so I'll be able to make it to the game in the afternoon. Then the Sunday show is at noon, so I'll even get to sleep in a little bit before I have to take her to the show.

 

[Mercule]

I'm going on 10 years of marriage. My wife has been gaming with me for 12 years -- although, she took a 2 or so year hiatus after she finally "caught" me. She's as much a part of the group as any other player. I doubt she'd join a game without me, but I'm far from certain. I know I'd feel really guilty joining a game without her.

I am more obsessive about it, though. But that's really just the difference between being a long-term DM with my own homebrew setting and being a player.

Actually, we've got six players in my group, which consist of three married/engaged couples. There's only one person there who I think is there because it's what all her friends are doing -- although she seems to enjoy it well enough on its own. Otherwise, the others all asked independantly to play.

 

[The_Gunslinger658]

Hi ya-

ha ha, my SO is the Army, I'd go for the G/F thing, but I never know if I'm going to be deploying back to Iraq at a moments notice so gotta stay single.

Before 9/11, my ex used to hate that I played games. To each their own I guess.


Scott

 

[Psion]

I need a "They know but just don't get it" option.

And I need one that says "She games to be social but doesn't get it" option.

 

[fett527]

My wife doesn't really like gaming. Then again, she doesn't really like any hobby that keeps me busy doing something that doesn't involve the family somehow for extended lengths of time.

But she doesn't make a big deal out of it either.

Ditto on my wife not liking gaming because she feels it takes away from the family time.

She DOES make a big deal out of it going as far as using the "it's an immature child's game" route. I've tried all the comparisons I can think of (like it's the same as your friend's husband playing poker a few hours onee night a week. Except I don't lose money ), but she has never changed the way she feels. We came to a compromise sometime back, but she would be happier if I never gamed again.

 

[Ruined]

My fiance' is into gaming just as much as I am. We joke that we'll never break up because we don't want to have to split up the books we own. I had resigned myself to the point that I wouldn't find someone who appreciated my hobbies, let alone enjoy them. I was very happy to be proven wrong.

(plus she prints and binds my PDFs for me at work. What more can a man hope for?)

 

[Henry]

My wife knows and approves. She thinks it's "cute" the same way she thinks guys enjoying poker or NASCAR or watching baseball or football are "cute", and knows it's my guy time, as well as my time to vent steam from the week. She doesn't play, doesn't understand the appeal, but does understand the game so that she can talk to me about it. The only time she never supported me was a few years back when I was devoting an inordinate amount of my time to it and neglecting her - which she was right about. As long was we make time together, and as long as household duties of all sorts are in order, I can game and buy to my little hearts' content.

 

[diaglo]

i'm with Henry.

although, my wife doesn't approve if it means having to miss RL stuff.