Happy Haggert Hurried Hungry Hitch Hiking Hired Henchmen Hivers.... apply within

[Mad_Jack]

This is why you only have internet friends

Real life is horribly overrated... I've read tons of bad reviews of it on the internet.

 

[Blackrat]

The graphics are horrible, the interface gets more laggy the longer you run it, it’s a total pay to win scheme, and there’s mysterious bugs all over the code… Yeah, I don’t recommend it either.

Oh, and you keep losing access to many of the features as you play along…

 

[CleverNickName]

Some of the loot boxes are pretty good, though (if you can afford them).

 

[J.Quondam]

Some avatars are pretty nice, but mine needs patches. Constantly have to reboot. Save points don't work. Too many microtransactions, but those aren't as bad as the terrible macrotransactions! Will wait for next version before playing again.
2/5 stars.

 

[Aeson]

I just know that hot chick with the amazing eyes* working at McDonald's last night is actually some fat neck beard in his mom's basement.

*I swear to all of the gods she may have been the most beautiful woman I've seen working fast food. I want to go tonight to see her again.

 

[Aeson]

This is a mother and daughter. They look like they could be sisters. Hard to believe she has a 13 year old daughter. The daughter has been on a number of tv shows over the years. I didn't know her mom could sing. I've seen a couple of videos she's done.

 

[Aeson]

Another Coast to Coast AM guest claims she can do psychic surgery via Skype. All of her "magic" is done by blinking. Her left eye does one thing and her right does another. Also as an infant she could blink written messages to people. How believing this stuff not a mental illness?

 

[Mad_Jack]

Another Coast to Coast AM guest claims she can do psychic surgery via Skype. All of her "magic" is done by blinking. Her left eye does one thing and her right does another. Also as an infant she could blink written messages to people. How believing this stuff not a mental illness?

You just haven't figured out yet how to unlock your ancient ancestral alien psychic powers yet using the secret Mayan and Martian techniques passed down through the hidden messages in the lyrics of today's heavy metal music...
For $49.95, I can teach you how.

 

[J.Quondam]

Sometimes I wish I had no ethics, so I could take a swing at making money off crazy grifts.

 

[Mad_Jack]

I once actually considered starting a self-help cult as a grand prank... Aside from entertaining me, it would have also afforded me the opportunity to manipulate people, but without the bother of having to feel vaguely guilty about it because I'd be doing it for their own good. Of course I quickly dropped the idea, since it would have gotten old really fast - it's just too much work to screw peoples' head back on right.