Sepulchrave II
Legend
I chased a player off with a broom handle one time.
I was a difficult teen.
I was a difficult teen.
Have you ever driven a player from a game?
Stormonu
Legend
I've had a lot of players come and go at my games - lots who have played one time and then I never see again, but I don't know if I've ever driven someone away from my game with my antics.
The closest I can think of was a young couple I was gaming with when in Georgia a few years back. They were newlywed as were my wife and I. They were the only friends we had around us at the time - though I can't remember how we met them (we'd just moved there, my wife was going to college for her BS) and after about three months of gaming ... they just didn't show up any more and they wouldn't answer our phone calls. I saw them once more some time later, wheeling around a stroller (yes, with a baby in tow), but was ignored by them and never got the story of just exactly why they just stopped (though I had a partial guess) and would not have anything to do with my wife or I any more. It was just sort of strange.
On the opposite end, I have had a case of a very patient player - in his first game, we helped him make up a character but things were so involved with the established group I couldn't seem to find a point to bring him into the game (I was very young and stupid, looking back I should have made such a point). He hung around for literally four hours doing nothing before we took a break. I forget how I got him into the group later, but I am amazed he stayed around (and became a steady player) and I still get quite embarrassed about my faux pas of keeping him hanging for so long.
...And then there was the cheater I had to drive from playing at our games. My group asked me why it took me so long to "call him out" on the cheating.
The closest I can think of was a young couple I was gaming with when in Georgia a few years back. They were newlywed as were my wife and I. They were the only friends we had around us at the time - though I can't remember how we met them (we'd just moved there, my wife was going to college for her BS) and after about three months of gaming ... they just didn't show up any more and they wouldn't answer our phone calls. I saw them once more some time later, wheeling around a stroller (yes, with a baby in tow), but was ignored by them and never got the story of just exactly why they just stopped (though I had a partial guess) and would not have anything to do with my wife or I any more. It was just sort of strange.
On the opposite end, I have had a case of a very patient player - in his first game, we helped him make up a character but things were so involved with the established group I couldn't seem to find a point to bring him into the game (I was very young and stupid, looking back I should have made such a point). He hung around for literally four hours doing nothing before we took a break. I forget how I got him into the group later, but I am amazed he stayed around (and became a steady player) and I still get quite embarrassed about my faux pas of keeping him hanging for so long.
...And then there was the cheater I had to drive from playing at our games. My group asked me why it took me so long to "call him out" on the cheating.
Sorrowdusk
First Post
Maybe he WAS Ash and he had to hunt down some REAL deadites, and was too busy to fool with the fake ones in your campaign.
I would say that I haven't "driven off" a player, on the basis that the way it's phrased seems like it would be done indirectly, in a passive-aggressive sort of way. That's not my style... While I generally don't let things get under my skin, I've got a pretty low tolerance for BS and I'm pretty direct when something needs to be addressed.
As a DM, if I have a problem with a player, I speak to them about it outside the game. I try to treat it as an information-gathering thing rather than as a chastisement (at least at first). I directly let them know what I'm concerned about and where the boundaries of acceptable behavior are. If the behavior continues, I tell them that they're out. I don't try to "fix it in game" and I don't engage in the passive-aggressive junior high games. I'm just honest with people. It's worked pretty well for close to twenty years.
That being said, there are several specific things that I've instantly dismissed a player for in the past, including:
• Someone that showed up to the game and immediately asked for money to cover "cab fare." He had apparently offered his mother $20 to allow him to play D&D that day, but had no job or other means to come up with $20--so he thought it'd be perfectly acceptable to ask strangers he met on the internet for money the first time he met them. This guy was twenty-six at the time, for what that's worth.
• The guy who had his girlfriend tag along to the game, but didn't allow her to play. This guy wouldn't "allow" her to sit in a chair when one was offered and told her to sit on the floor, and he apparently didn't "allow" her to speak to strangers. She snuggled up to his leg in a way that left no doubt as to how regularly this occurred. The host actually let them stay for almost thirty minutes before we confronted this dude and told him that his lady could sit in a chair like a person and speak for herself or they could leave.
• The homeless guy that showed up and promptly told the group that he played D&D so he could hang out inside the game store for a few hours (where there was AC and a water fountain). There was some sort of homeless pecking order, and apparently, he was avoiding some of the other homeless people at the public library.
• A new player that asked a female player if she's ever had an abortion-- literally right after being introduced. "Hi, I'm Ted and I'm playing an elf ranger. Jane? Hi! So, um, have you ever had an abortion? You look sort of like this girl I knew in high school that had an abortion."
Warning: Kinda gross...
• The player that vomited in the host's kitchen sink, then casually wiped his face off with his already-stained shirt and insisted that we carry on with the game. The fact that he was wearing a cup of his own vomit and left a sink half-full of vomit didn't seem to phase him in the least.
I wish I were kidding. Sometimes, I wonder about these "normal" groups that I hear so much about.
As a DM, if I have a problem with a player, I speak to them about it outside the game. I try to treat it as an information-gathering thing rather than as a chastisement (at least at first). I directly let them know what I'm concerned about and where the boundaries of acceptable behavior are. If the behavior continues, I tell them that they're out. I don't try to "fix it in game" and I don't engage in the passive-aggressive junior high games. I'm just honest with people. It's worked pretty well for close to twenty years.
That being said, there are several specific things that I've instantly dismissed a player for in the past, including:
• Someone that showed up to the game and immediately asked for money to cover "cab fare." He had apparently offered his mother $20 to allow him to play D&D that day, but had no job or other means to come up with $20--so he thought it'd be perfectly acceptable to ask strangers he met on the internet for money the first time he met them. This guy was twenty-six at the time, for what that's worth.
• The guy who had his girlfriend tag along to the game, but didn't allow her to play. This guy wouldn't "allow" her to sit in a chair when one was offered and told her to sit on the floor, and he apparently didn't "allow" her to speak to strangers. She snuggled up to his leg in a way that left no doubt as to how regularly this occurred. The host actually let them stay for almost thirty minutes before we confronted this dude and told him that his lady could sit in a chair like a person and speak for herself or they could leave.
• The homeless guy that showed up and promptly told the group that he played D&D so he could hang out inside the game store for a few hours (where there was AC and a water fountain). There was some sort of homeless pecking order, and apparently, he was avoiding some of the other homeless people at the public library.
• A new player that asked a female player if she's ever had an abortion-- literally right after being introduced. "Hi, I'm Ted and I'm playing an elf ranger. Jane? Hi! So, um, have you ever had an abortion? You look sort of like this girl I knew in high school that had an abortion."
Warning: Kinda gross...
• The player that vomited in the host's kitchen sink, then casually wiped his face off with his already-stained shirt and insisted that we carry on with the game. The fact that he was wearing a cup of his own vomit and left a sink half-full of vomit didn't seem to phase him in the least.
I wish I were kidding. Sometimes, I wonder about these "normal" groups that I hear so much about.
Ringlerun
First Post
In my teens i chased a stinky player off with a hose.
Zhaleskra
Adventurer
I can be pretty nasty sometimes. Had one younger player who tried to remove all magic from his characters. This would have been fine in most games. Unfortunately, we were playing World Tree, where everybody has a little magic.
So after a few insults too many, he left not only the gaming group, but the stage fighting club where we'd recruited him from. Fell completely off the map from what the owner of the stage fighting club said.
So after a few insults too many, he left not only the gaming group, but the stage fighting club where we'd recruited him from. Fell completely off the map from what the owner of the stage fighting club said.
Jeff Wilder
First Post
Well, I consider Kentucky more the Midwest than the South, but then I grew up in Lexington and Louisville, and have very little experience with the rural areas of the state. I moved here in '98, towing along my best friend (and ex-girlfriend) and my then-current girlfriend. A year later, with the economy booming out here, I talked another couple of very good friends into moving out here. We're all still here (and I, for one, can't even force myself to visit Kentucky).
kitsune9
Adventurer
Actually, I was referring to myself being a Southerner since I grew up in the other states too (Navy brat). Funny that you mention that you cannot force yourself to visit KY. I feel the exact way. I lived in Louisville.
ExploderWizard
Hero
OK you can come clean now. Admit that he really quit the game when you announced that it would no longer be held poolside.
Jeff Wilder
First Post
Nice catch. I woulda gone with the math joke, though. More geek cachet.
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