How do you deal with whiny players?

[SuperFlyTNT]

I'm running a campaign and at one point my party got seperated. One of the players throws a fit like I just killed his puppy or something. Everything worked out like its supposed to but the simple fact is this guy was being a whiny little *****. At that moment I plotted to kill his charecter in our next sessions. I think I'm being vindictive though and it wont solve anything. So how do you deal with a situation like this?

 

[shilsen]

Definitely do not kill his character because he upset you. That would be really petty and would cause much more trouble than it would solve (esp. since it wouldn't solve anything, as you already know).

Since that session and the whining are over, I'd just not bother about it now. If he starts whining about something else in game, just look at him and say calmly, "Okay, complaint noted. We'll discuss it when we take a break. Back to the game." And go back to DMing. A lot of the time, that'll nip things in the bud and by the time you get to a period when you could discuss it, either (a) the player will have forgotten about it or (b) the situation will have been resolved. If not, just explain to the player that in your opinion it's not worth complaining about and esp. not so during the game, since it holds up things and takes away from the enjoyment of everyone at the table. As long as you handle it calmly and without getting excited, it shouldn't be a problem.

There's my $0.02.

 

[Eremite]

Firstly, I simply accept that players will whine. It seems to be a fundamental qualification for -playing- D&D with (sadly) very few exceptions.

Secondly, I always look at the reason they are whining.

Is it me failing as a DM? That's always my first question. Am I favouring other players (especially the ones who don't whine!)? Is the adventure/campaign too difficult? Is the player's character given enough chances to shine?

Is is inter-player dynamics? One of my players (who whines very little, in fact!) can be very disruptive because he likes to needle other players with thinner skins. His presence can provoke a lot of whining so I'm careful now about which groups I have him play in.

Finally, is it just that the player simply enjoys whining/has a bad attitude? If it's this, either the player has to change or the player has to go.

 

[Turanil]

Everything worked out like its supposed to but the simple fact is this guy was being a whiny little *****.

It's difficult to know whether he is really a whiny player or if you are an unfair DM. Can you tell us more of what happened exactly? In any case I wouldn't kill his character, but would have a discussion with him, to know exactly what his concerns are, and if they are justified or not. Then, maybe tell him that the game is going to continue like this, and that if he doesn't like it he should change of game.

 

[BlueBlackRed]

When you're young, your choices in players are limited.
As you get older, it becomes quite a bit easier to find a group that is more suited to your personality and play-style.

In high-school, I had no choice but to play in a game that was full of people I wanted to throw through a window. There was the cheater/liar, the drug-user, the weekly-bather, the spaz, the whiner, the guy who tried to get everyone to get along in spite of the impossibilities, the punk, the prankster, the drama boy, mr. insecurity, the bore, and the stuck-up jerk (me).

I look back at those years and am so glad they are done and over. I've recently gotten back in contact with some of them, and they have not changed one bit.

So, if you're still young, suck it up and prepare for the long haul.
If you're out of college, either look for a replacement player, or a new group to play in.

 

[Snotlord]

I let the whiners make their complaints, then try to shut them up once they start over. If the complaint is fair I try to deal with the problem. If the complain is unfair I say so and ignores future complaints.

 

[fusangite]

BlueBlackRed certainly has a strong point. However, sometimes we are stuck with the whiner for more complex social reasons. In my case, it was because he was the new SO of my ex who remained a very popular member of my gaming group. So there was just no way to get rid of him without the group losing everybody's favourite member (and the person who figured out about 70% of everything requiring analysis in the game).

One of the problems that made this difficult was the whiner synergy that he could achieve. There was one other player, again a longstanding member of the group, who could be goaded into whining about the opposite things due to his passive-aggressive conflict with the player. I tried all kinds of solutions but, sadly, nothing worked. If you come up with a solution other than the whiner and the group parting ways, let me know -- I'm sure the issue will come up again should I ever move back to my home town.

I'll just leave off by sharing my favourite quote from my whiny player (during combat, in episode #2): "A 17? A 17!? If I knew I'd have to roll a 17, I wouldn't have even come tonight."

 

[DragonLancer]

I'd certainly like to know what happened to make him whine, before I could offer any advice.

 

[Kae'Yoss]

I'll just leave off by sharing my favourite quote from my whiny player (during combat, in episode #2): "A 17? A 17!? If I knew I'd have to roll a 17, I wouldn't have even come tonight."

I'm sorry, but you have to put him down. My suggestion: make it slow and painful

Another possibility (that won't result in you going to jail) is that you just put a foot down and tell him that he's a whiner, disrupting the game and that he should put himself together.

 

[SuperFlyTNT]

The Air ship was departing, the gangplank had been pulled and the ship was pulling away from the dock. Several players made it to the ship (whiner included) and jumped aboard as it was leaving. They tried throwing rope to the people still on the dock. Then the two players grab the rope and are pulled off the dock as the ship departs, on a climb check they both roll under 7. They fall, the mage casts feather fall on herself and the gnome. They get back on the dock and are picked up by another ship. Meanwhile Sir Whines-a-lot is fuming because the commercial air ship wont make a special trip to go back and get his friends. Nevermind the captian is about ready to toss them overboard for jumping aboard his ship with out paying fare or the proper papers. Instead of trying to talk there way out of this situation he tries to threaten the captain. The captain calmly and cooly replies "if you want to see your friends that bad it can be aranged- but this ship isnt turning around." At this point our players huffs and puffs then slumps down into his seat and mumbles and complains and wants to know why they cant just go back and get them. Am I being unfair?