How Do You Explain D&D To Non-Gamers?

[Serenity]

I usually explain it like this:

Think of your favorite story. D&D is a game where one person (the DM) is the storyteller and all the other player's are characters in the story. You dictate the actions of your character within the framework of the story. (I ask, how many times have you been reading a book or watching a show and you think "No, don't go in there!") And that is basically how it works. The dice represent 'random chance' for things like combat or performing heroic acts (and the rolls are modified based on how powerful your character is).

Most people seem to be able to relate to it as a story where you control the actions of the main character.

And for the record, I am NOT a closet gamer. Everyone who knows me, knows I play. As for being a stereotypical geek (which was referenced in several of the posts), I am unsure what that means. I am a former Marine so I guess that means I'm not stereotypical anyway. Besides, labels such as 'geek' and 'nerd' don't really mean anything once you get out of high school anyway (IMHO)

As Bill Gates once said, "Be nice to geeks, you'll probably end up working for one."

 

[Shadowslayer]

I just explain it as a jumped up board game/war game, where one player designs the board and controls the opponents, and each player's "man" has certain sets of abilities at his disposal that get better as the game goes on. Most people can get a grip on it when you give them the bare bones like this.

I know that's not the whole ball of wax, but I find that emphasizing the playacting and co-operative storytelling aspect of it is what makes people think its loopier than it really is.

 

[Nonlethal Force]

"When you watch a movie you're passively entertained, right? You don't have to do much, don't even have to visualize the pictures like in a book. Well, a role-playing game is active entertainment - you make your fun as you make the story. There is no script. Imagine a good chess match, improv acting workshop, and karaoke contest rolled into one, except the only competition is who can be more entertaining."

This is typically the avenue I take, although my line of work somewhat demands that I closet game as well. But, to those who do find out - I don't ever lie about it - I follow the line of thining my wife developed. Actually, come to think of it, she was the one that made me okay with the fact that I am a gamer and not some geek. I used to hide my love for D&D by simply doing online stuff and SRD stuff. She caught on and encouraged me to pick up the hobby - even though she has no interest in doing so herself. [Pretty darn cool wife I have, to be honest]

Anyway, my wife's line of thinking goes like this, and I pull no punches [Emphasis hers]:

"Any idiot can sit in front of the television and be entertained. Any moron can enjoy someone else's version of how they see life. It takes a true thinker to be able to tell your own story in a way that is entertaining to other people. D&D need not be a kids game, if done in the right manner it is actually much more impressive to pull off a good game of D&D than watching television or even performing a play. In D&D you not only act, you write the script."

 

[Nyaricus]

If asked, I say something like "It's a game where you get to play a hero, using dice to determine outcomes of situations and create a story with friends all at the same time. You play sitting around a table usually, and you have a character sheet to keep track of how well you can fight, or cast magic and whatnot."

If they seem intersted, I might delve into a more long-term conversation about it.

 

[TalonComics]

I rarely run into people who don't understand what RPGs are but when I do I explain it a couple of different ways depending on the person.

1. Video Game Player Or someone who understands what video games consist of are the easiest. "RPGs are essentially video games without the electricity. I provide the 'system/console' as the GM and the players respond to my dialog."

2. Theatre/Movies - Also an easy explanation. "It's like improvisational theatre. I'm the director/playwrite and the players are the actors." If you want to be a snob about it you can always say, "if you don't understand that then there's no point explaining further." I wouldn't do that though.

If they can't understand what you're talking about from these examples I pretty much give up.

Honestly, like all hobbies, not everyone is going to "get it" nor are they going to be interested. NASCAR is a sport and not everyone "gets it" but I still see total "NASCAR Geeks" running around.

Everyone geeks out about something. If someone gives you serious crap about your personal hobbies then I have two words for them.

~D

 

[jmucchiello]

Get out of the closet!! My financial planner's involved in Vampire LARPs. Perhaps we need another "why I don't tell people I game" thread.

These "explain gaming to non-gamers" threads are always retreads but I like Nonlethal Force's wife's description so much I had to post and say so. "Well done."

I like the "it's a boardgame version of cops and robbers/cowboys and indians/let's pretend" description myself. Emphasizing the role-playing part makes it sound like your involved in group therapy.

Also, remember to keep it brief. No need to discuss abilities and classes and stuff. If someone is explaining to you what sewing circles are all about, they don't discuss fabric cutting techniques as part of the introduction to the concept.

 

[vulcan_idic]

This seems to make people think that it is some sort of improvisational theatre!

It isn't? Seems to me it fits the concept quite well from the improv we did in classes back when I was a Theatre major in college... There are certain specified rules to follow in any given game, sometimes more, sometimes less, everyone kind of makes up new things about their character as they go along adding new things to what was known before about it, all the while collectively telling a highly entertaining story. Just because you're table topping instead of LARPing (which I've yet to find enjoyable) doesn't make it less improvisational theatre, it just redefines the rules.

 

[TalonComics]

Yeah, I agree, keep it simple. Once you get off on the mechanics or background you start sounding like "greenleaf".

As for the "In the Closet" gamers... I use to care that people were ashamed of their hobby but then I realized it's not my problem. If that's how they feel then that's how they feel.

However... If I ever hear a guy (I've never heard a girl say this) say, "I met this girl and I don't want her to know I'm a gamer so I'm hiding all of my game books. I think she'll like me more if she doesn't know." Then it's time for the little talk.

~D

 

[bodhi]

2. Theatre/Movies - Also an easy explanation. "It's like improvisational theatre. I'm the director/playwrite and the players are the actors." If you want to be a snob about it you can always say, "if you don't understand that then there's no point explaining further." I wouldn't do that though.

If you do that, you need to pose gazing slightly upwards, back of the hand to your temple. Then sigh and drift off ethereally (astrally, noncorporeally, whatever).

If someone gives you serious crap about your personal hobbies then I have two words for them.

ITYM "I got two words for ya!"

 

[Illirion]

I usually explain it the most honest way I can:

First I start of by telling them it's a game where you and several other players (you usually play with around 5 people or more) get to create your own hero's (in the style of lord of the rings, in case they don't know any computer fantasy rpg's) except there is one player (called the DM) who doesn't have a hero and gets to create the adventures the other hero's will have to complete instead (he's like a referee/coach at a football match, or the designer of a computergame). It's also the goal of the game to copmplete those adventures and work together with the other hero's in order to overcome the challenges the DM throws at you. Then I say that, because you don't have any electronics, the rules for creating the hero's and the adventures are in big rulebooks which you can use during the game. Finally I say that the adventures usually involve a lot of fighting and combat, so you have to use a board and miniatures to play out the combat situations. Then, after a few sessions of gaming, you've practically played out a whole story created by you and your friends (like lord of the rings again if they don't exactly get the fantasy setting thing yet) and if you don't think that's cool, your not going to like D&D.

I'm not a closet gamer, because I always give people an honest answer about what I'm doing on a friday night and I'm not ashamed of it or anything. I know I'm a normal/fun guy most of the time and if people don't already get that I'm a bit geeky sometimes, they'll get it eventually. If they really don't want to asociate with D&D playing people, that's their problem and not mine (and honestly a bit of an anti-social attitude if you ask me).

"Sorry, I can't make it friday, I've got D&D that night."
"What's D&D?"
"Oh, it's just a game I play with some friends on friday's and it's kinda hard for me to pass it up. So how about saturday?"
(if they continue asking on about it even after that, I'll give them the story above.)

Key is not to make D&D the main topic of the conversation (I know it's a subconcious tendency, but try and fight it anyway ) unless the person you're talking to has enough time to hear the story and really wants to know.

Note that I don't bring D&D and my rpg'ing up spontaneously. I don't do that sort of stuff even with my more "cooler" hobby's, like being guitarist in a band (which generally get's a better response than being the DM of a D&D group ).

I also have the luck of not having a job yet in which I recieve pay/achieve rank (partly) based on the way others think of me.

Sorry btw for the long post :\ .