Jameson Courage - the reason that there seems to be two levels of criticism being applied is because there is. 4e is unbelievable because people heal too quickly. But, apparently, 3e is perfectly believable, despite the fact that the people heal WAY too quickly.
No, you don't have a bunch of people saying that 3.X is perfectly believable. I mean, people will make that claim, yes. But I'm also advocating splitting HP into two pools, physical and non-physical, and other people support a wound/vitality system, and other people have other solutions. It's not even about believability (to me), it's about possible fantasy-genre narratives being excluded.
People heal way too quickly in 3.X
if you're looking at things purely realistically. Again, the argument is "in 4e, people are heroes and can persevere through it (second wind, etc.)" while if you ask for a nod to long term wounds, it's "but now you need to take forever to heal, and you'll need penalties, etc." Suddenly you're not heroic enough to persevere without taking penalties. Suddenly you're not heroic enough to get up after 10 days when you should still be resting (but you're a hero so you persevere anyways).
I'm not sure why you suddenly lose this heroic aspect of your character, or why it's being applied to one instance and not the other. And you linking The Princess Bride (good movie) kind of makes the point for me again. In 4e, you can heroically push through it. If you take a wound that takes 10 days to heal naturally, why can't you heroically push through it when it's done mechanically healing?
Yeah, you almost died, and you've mostly healed (flavor-wise), but you push yourself to your feet and decide to go back to helping people that need you. You still have cracked ribs, or bruised bones, or you're a little shaky when you stand, but you push on through it (you don't take penalties).
Remember, in The Princess Bride, Wesley gets a very long term wound when he's tortured. He's not able to take an extended rest and be good to go. I support having a mechanic that makes the fight with the Six-Fingered Man possible, but I want the mechanics to allow me to have a character who's out of it because of injury, too. This is common in fantasy, and there's very little reason to deny that point.
I'm asking for a way for that narrative to be represented in the game. I want more possible narratives. I like seeing how the story will unfold. To that end, full healing after an extended rest prevents certain common fantasy-genre narratives, and rather needlessly in my mind. I don't care if people get up earlier than they should -that's heroic. I want there to be a possibility of them staying down for a while, though.
The problem that I see is that people are taking a purely gamist concept - HP and healing and trying to apply some level of simulationist concept to it. HP are, and always were a gamist concept with a very, very bare nod to realism.
The mechanic has always been very abstract, yes. In 3.X, I felt like it could support a wide array of narratives because of just how abstract it was. It wasn't perfect for what I wanted, which is why I changed it in my RPG. However, I do feel like the current healing surge implementation limits narrative paths more than opens them up. It's not about how simulationist it is (to me), it's about limiting fantasy-genre narrative opportunities that would be really interesting to experience during a campaign.