That's essentially what I said "if we're assuming they're not our equals the entire discussion is moot". A race that can't fight back is obviously not our military equal..
Also a completely pacifistic intelligent race with no means of fighting is rather unrealistic. Survival of the fittest is evolution, not human psychology. The entire concept of a species that is unfamiliar with conflict seems absurd to me. You don't get to be the dominant species of an entire planet like that.
The only ways they could NOT be approximately as prepared for war as us (given similar technological advancement) is if A) Their planet did not undergo natural selection, or B) They evolved far beyond it.
The first is highly unlikely, the second would more than likely have lead to highly advanced reasoning and science without the strife and conflict that usually get in the way. It would also have required that ALL of the races on their planet were conflict-free, meaning they wouldn't even recognize what conflict is. Otherwise, any race so advanced would have made at least a cursory study of the other life forms around it and come to the realization that just because THEY are enlightened and non-violent doesn't mean everybody is.
EVEN THEN, They would have had decades to study us and realize how warlike we were, before we would even have been capable of launching an attack on them. By simple reverse engineering they could figure out how to wage war in return.
On another note, two powers do not need to be EQUAL to make co-operation relevant, the lesser just has to be capable of making the alternative more costly than beneficial. That's the entire basis behind Guerilla warfare.
EDIT: TBC. Gotta hit the hay.