Is Being a Fantasy/Sci-Fi Fan Necessary to Fit in with a D&D Group?

[morrolan]

Diaglo you make some good points re stereotyping, but I think ct is less worried about putting down fanboys as less educated or whatever, than just the discomfort of trying to hang with people you have little in common with. I'm sure everyone's been in that situation where you percieve (true or not) that you are an outsider.

ct for your part, I think if you feel disconnected, it's easier to maintain a barrier than break it down. No-one says you need to have the same interests outside the game to have a great time, or even become great friends. Maybe make the attempt to branch out your own interests while encouraging your group to broaden theirs. Some (stodgy) lit-critics would suggest that evaluating Dylan lyrics insted of Wallace Stevens is akin to reading comics instead of Joyce. Luckily literature classes are opening up to the idea that "pop" culture is worth studying. To me a great comic can be just as much of a masterpiece as the Great Gatsby. Unfortunately there are a lot less great comics than novels.

Blargh, I shouldnt' wake and type.

 

[the Jester]

Cybertalus, think of diaglo as gently irascible and you're halfway to understanding him. He's a big teddy bear of a guy in person- one of the nicest fellas I've ever met.

I don't think you have to be a big fantasy/sci-fi guy to have fun in a dnd group. I think that there are often elements that fantasy and sci-fi books and movies share with a dnd game, so it's somewhat natural that comparisons are drawn with them to your group, or they come up in discussion (because you're thinking about fantasyesque stuff anyway) and so on.

Try the group, if you don't have fun, leave and look for another. If you don't enjoy hanging out with them outside of the game, don't do it. If you enjoy hanging out with them but not (for instance) hanging out watching anime, do other things with them and go home when the anime comes on. No reason for you to hang out and not enjoy yourself, you know?

 

[cybertalus]

Diaglo you make some good points re stereotyping, but I think ct is less worried about putting down fanboys as less educated or whatever, than just the discomfort of trying to hang with people you have little in common with. I'm sure everyone's been in that situation where you percieve (true or not) that you are an outsider.

You said it better than I could. In fact looking back I wish I'd chosen some different examples, because the ones I picked do seem kind of haughty. I'd be just as happy discussing last night's NYPD Blue as I would be discussing the last indie film I saw.

And it's not that I've ever been asked to leave a group because I wasn't enough of a fan or anything, but I have been in situations where I felt that aside from being human and playing D&D I had virtually nothing in common with the other people in the room. Gaming clubs have definitely been the worst for this.

Blargh, I shouldnt' wake and type.

No, I think you have a lot of valid points. You've given me stuff to think on, and that's what I was after as much as anything. Of course until I do think about them some more I don't have much to say about them.

Oh, and on those Dylan lyrics... I think you just turned me on to a Dylan song I'd always overlooked. Though is it just me, or is it almost always Dylan's story songs that leave the most to think about?

 

[Buttercup]

but I have been in situations where I felt that aside from being human and playing D&D I had virtually nothing in common with the other people in the room.

I think that most of us feel this way, for a large part of our life. I know that I felt that way pretty constantly (minus the D&D) for many years, and still do sometimes.

It's true that gamers tend to have common points of reference, like Monty Python, LotR and so forth. But other than that, I think Diaglo is correct. We aren't really different, on balance, from any group of people who share a hobby. Some of us are smart, some of us are dumb. Some of us are arrogant, some of us are humble. And we all feel alone.

The trick, I think, is to find a group of gamers to hang out with who will enjoy talking about the same things you do, and perhaps will have the same world view you do. I'm not sure I agree with Diaglo that this is a function of age, at least not foremost, but it certainly is a function of education, and probably socio-economic background as well.

Interestingly, none of the people I game with are into horror, anime, comics, collectibles and novels based on movies/licensed properties. In fact, I don't think I know anyone IRL who is into that stuff.

 

[knitnerd]

Way back in ancient times(late1970's) I started seeing articles about a new fad call role playing games in science fiction magazines. It took me about 5 years to find a basic set and another 20 years to find a group to play with. I was surprised by how little they knew about science fiction and fantasy books that hadn't been made into TV shows. Doesn't anyone read anymore? I have to get some used paperbacks and introduce them to the good stuff.

 

[diaglo]

Way back in ancient times(late1970's) I started seeing articles about a new fad call role playing games in science fiction magazines. It took me about 5 years to find a basic set and another 20 years to find a group to play with. I was surprised by how little they knew about science fiction and fantasy books that hadn't been made into TV shows. Doesn't anyone read anymore? I have to get some used paperbacks and introduce them to the good stuff.

come join the book club.

http://www.enworld.org/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=56

visit this forum and look for the book talk/chat...

all some of us do is read. i don't have cable. i don't watch the idiot box. i don't hang out on the internet...wait take that one back.

 

[Robbert Raets]

Any advice then for what a "pale fanatic" can do when surrounded by the more serious fans?

For one thing my experience has been that the serious fans don't always take it well when you've tried their favorite fannish thing and it's not your liking, no matter how diplomatically you phrase your disinterest.

Sounds like they failed their reality check. People are less likely to be 'into' games or comics then the nationalistic sport or the latest soap operaaahrg. You might want to convince them that dogmatic thinking is bad for the (gaming) industry. You were willing to keep an open mind when trying their stuff, and it's only courteous for them to do the same.

 

[Welverin]

i don't do comics after 1974.

Do you like anything that started after 1974?

 

[Hand of Evil]

Imagination is the only requirement.

I am a fan of SciFi and Fantasy but also of the history of the ancient world, I also like to know how things work.

 

[knitnerd]

come join the book club.

http://www.enworld.org/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=56

visit this forum and look for the book talk/chat...

all some of us do is read. i don't have cable. i don't watch the idiot box. i don't hang out on the internet...wait take that one back.

Still mostly TV and movie chat. I would have found the thread eventually. The volume on this forum is daunting. Doesn't anyone ever leave their computer?