Lame Names


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Psimancer said:
Our resident power-gamer DMed a game once, and during it we were brought before...


Baron Generic





Worst name ever.

Granted, while DMing, I was at a loss to name a cleric that the party had just met. Thus was born Father Generic.

Had a player once name his wizard Cookie Jarvis.
 

One of my early characters was Van Halen. (and I didn't think it was cheesy at the time)

My brothers and sister came up with some whoppers:

Snake Walker (from the muppets...kills frogs)
Saucipoo
Merlock the Mighty!

And more recently-
Leroy Jenkins
 

I've had a few go through my games...not all the below are mine...:

A Cavalier (later Paladin): Sir Kalvin of Hobbes

A high-level Cleric the party used as mentor and life revivor: His Convenience (so named by the party because that's when he did things...at his convenience. They never knew his real name...)

Minor NPC Cleric: Elnoc (stands for Expendable Lawful Neutral Osiris Cleric, which he was)

Minor character seen in someone else's game: Knottwoor Thmutch

Lanefan
 



A friend of mine uses the name "Zephrum" as his screenname in a lot of things. Thus, in a long-running game under a homebrew system, his character was a mage named "Zeph Rum."

I named an NPC wizard "Fob" once. Not sure why, but it's a lame name.
 

2E's Raven's Bluff accessory is spoilt by the terrible names including a cleric of Sune named after a p-rno actress.

One of my few non-negotiable rules in my games is that names cannot suck. No real world names, no (obvious) puns etc.... I will kill characters for that... and I will kill players for repeat offences! ;)
 

A new player once came up with the name "Himo" for his male elven ranger.

When I said he couldn't use that after a few sessions of the other players mercilessly making fun of him (c'mon, either way you spin it, it's either "homo" or "emo"), he looked through a bunch of books... and came back with the name Gayle.

*facepalm*

cheers,
--N
 

I had a player once who had real trouble coming up with names. He went through a series of high-fatality elves ("I'm going to keep doing these until one of them works") named:

Zorkatron
Quinkatron
Glonkatron

One of them had a horse with a similar -atron name, but my mind has blotted it out.

Back in the 80s one of my friends had a knightly character named Sir Henry Gold-plume (and the Knights of the Golden Plume), which isn't a particularly terrible name but worthy of a groan once you recall that the popular and ground-breaking at the time TV cop show Hill Street Blues featured a character called Henry Goldblum.

Same player later named his dark elf character Mycota, after the anti-fungal powder to treat athlete's foot. There was method to his madness: if surface elves always have plant-y names like Greenleaf, then subterranean dark elves should be named after fungus.
 

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