Loyalty among gamers, does it exist?

[Wycen]

In this thread http://www.enworld.org/forum/general-rpg-discussion/305095-gaming-group-troubles.html the second post says there is no loyalty among gamers. Hmm.

Of course I suppose it depends on circumstances for each person answering that question, but do you really think that gamers jump ship like that? I've only recently found myself with any free time with school finished and so I've started gaming with friends infrequently on Sunday who are trying to get an Apocalypse World campaign going.

I was invited this week to another friend's new Pathfinder game, but he plans to run it on Sundays. So, I told him that I would like to play but he'd have to understand that I might not game with his group regularly because I have a prior loyalty that I don't intend to abandon just because I want to play Pathfinder. It could have just as easily been FATE or some other game. The game is less important to me than the opportunity to socialize with people I like, though I'd have turned down certain games which will probably not remain nameless.

So are gamers loyal to their friends or the game or something else?

 

[Starman]

I think some people are loyal to their friends, some to a game, and some to something else. People are people. They will always have their own personalities, whims, and idiosyncrasies whether they are gamers or not.

 

[DumbPaladin]

I'm loyal to people who have earned my friendship.

I have no reason to be loyal to anyone else -- and in fact, I'm usually not.

 

[Raven Crowking]

Loyalty to your friends doesn't mean playing in games you don't enjoy, from either side of the screen. Gaming is a big time investment.

I have lots of friends I don't game with; we just do other things.


RC

 

[Stumblewyk]

Maybe I'm naive, but I think I game with generally good people who would remain loyal to a game. Mostly because I only game with people I like, and each of my groups contains people who are, if not friends, easily could be.

Many of us do things together outside of gaming, so I think there's a bond there stronger than just "you and I get along well enough to roll dice together and pretend to be creatures out of fairy tales for a couple hours every once in a while."

I guess maybe I'm just lucky like that.

 

[Raven Crowking]

You can flip that, too....It would be disloyal of a person to insist that his friends play in a game they are not enjoying.

I have experienced a great deal of loyalty over the years among people who were enjoying the games I run. But, if they were not having fun, I would never consider it "disloyal" of them to choose to do something different! I would, instead, consider it good sense.

But, then, I'm funny like that.


RC

 

[Stumblewyk]

I certainly hope my players enjoy the games the I run. They say as much. But does that mean that a better game might not come along for them? Or hasn't already? I don't know, and likely never will. They've stuck with me, that's all I know for sure.

Now, I do play in a game that isn't exactly my perfect cup of tea. VERY rules heavy. Roleplaying is weak, if it exists at all. But I get along well with the group, and like the other players and GMs well enough to keep coming back. I've been contacted about other games that would require me to rearrange my game schedule and drop a game. I've declined because I'm in a group that works, and in a game that's good enough.

I understand that everyone's tolerance for "good enough" will differ from person to person however.

 

[the Jester]

Gamers tend to be as loyal (or not) as non-gamers.

They're much more likely to be loyal if they are your friends instead of "some guys you game with."

 

[tenkar]

As others have said, friendship trumps the game when it comes to loyalty.

 

[Raven Crowking]

I tend to think of it like any other (hopefully) longterm relationship.

If the relationship is good on its own terms, then it is good. It doesn't really matter what else is out there. The grass may seem greener is someone else's garden, but thinking that way never makes you happy. You only end up not appreciating your own grass. Soon enough, you don't even have a lawn.

OTOH, if the relationship is not good, DTMFA. It doesn't really matter whether or not you can see another lawn, or even hope to one day grow one.

And, just as there are people I have longterm relationships with (as friends) whom I have no interest in having more intimate forms of LTR with, so too I have friends whom I have no interest in having a LT gaming R with. And vice versa.

And that's cool.


RC