Memo to all 4th Edition Designers and Developers

[BadMojo]

Single words are not that bad. Character habits are worse. I mean if Nynaeve tags her braid one more time, I'll cut it with a scissor.

Hawk in Simon Green's "Hawk & Fisher" books spends a lot of time glaring. I think he might need an eye exam.

Also, I've never quite been able to figure out how the "dog's bollocks" are a good thing. Unless you happen to be the dog, I guess. They seem to like 'em.

 

[lurkinglidda]

I have a rules question: Is "kewl" an acceptable alternative?

Sadly, no. I checked. Not even the Marcia Brady version of kewl.

Cool beans, and other cool-xxxx combos are also off limits. We are not allowed to use any form of cool from here forward. In fact, I'm probably going to be reprimanded for typing it in this post.

I second the proposals of Shiny, Bee's Knees and Money. I'd personally like to suggest Cat's Meow if it hasn't already come up.

Oh, and although Scott's list of words will be Open Game Content, the concept of rolling for them is not.

 

[BiggusGeekus]

Also, 'Boss'.

Agreed. 'Boss' is conspicuous in its absence.


I blame the new shoe-wearing kender/haflings and I recommend a round of mass beatings.

 

[pneumatik]

Doin' it up right

Cool Replacement Tables

Roll 1d6. On a 1-3, go to table A. On a 4-5, go to table B. On a 6, go to table C.

Table A - Common and single words
Roll 1d20 and look up the result on the table.
1 Awesome
2 Wicked
3 Gnarly
4 Rad
5 To the Max
6 Sweet
7 Dope
8 Phat
9 Bitchin
10 Swell
11 Good
12 Great
13 Fantastic
14 OK
15 Neato
16 Groovy
17 Fetch
18 Hip
19 With it
20 DM's choice

Table B - Common and single words
Roll 1d20 and look up the result on the table.
1 Killer
2 Sick
3 Tight
4 Funky
5 Fresh
6 Def
7 Ripping
8 Fabulous
9 Glorious
10 Marvelous
11 Sensational
12 Splendid
13 Superb
14 Terrific
15 Wonderful
16 Hawt
17 Keen
18 Nifty
19 Rulez
20 DM's choice

Table C - Foreign, multiple, or too-normal words
Roll 1d6 and look up the result on the table.
1 Wicked Awesome
2 Hot
3 Bonzer (pronounced bonza)
4 Grouse
5 Rule(s)
6 DM's choice


Ah, 2nd ed. How I miss your treasure-hoard generation tables.

 

[TerraDave]

Memo


Le Rouse

...only/first one using le Le....feel so validated...

 

[Nom]

I was disappointed that I couldn't find a gnarly nifty cunning acrostic hidden in that list.

Which might be because none exists, or just that I'm not clever enough to find it.

 

[Callikah]

my friend uses beasty alot so i nominate that

im liiking the usage of rouse as a new term inplace of c*** it had a bloody rouse ring to it

 

[pukunui]

Bonzer* (pronounced bonza)
Grouse*

* Australia only

if you're going to pander to the Aussies, you should really consider adding some colloquialisms from their smaller but better neighbor across the Tasman: New Zealand (c'mon, didn't you watch Flight of the Conchords?).

The best substitute for "cool" in Kiwi slang is sweet as.

Choice is another good one that's used in both countries.


Cheers,
Jonathan

 

[Shazman]

Memo

To: WOTC 4th Edition D&D Developers & Designers
From: Le Rouse


It has been brought to our attention that we are over using the word "cool" to describe 4th edition. Greg Nard in accounting conducted a detailed statistical analysis of blog posts, articles, essays, hallway conversations and daydreams that showed the word "cool" has been used 1, 347,974 times since August 15, 2007 to describe 4th edition.

Validating this study are numerous posts on message boards like ENworld with titles including:

"4tards are not c44L" , "Keep your cool off my game", and "Cool WTF?"

Based on this alarming increase in the use of "cool" here are mandatory replacements for "cool" to be used immediately. If you have the urge to use "cool" please refer to this list.

Awesome
Wicked
Wicked Awesome
Gnarly
Rad
To the Max
Sweet
Dope
Phat
Bitchin
Swell
Good
Great
Fantastic
OK
Neato
Groovy
Fetch
Hip
With it
Killer
Sick
Tight
Funky
Fresh
Def
Ripping
Fabulous
Glorious
Marvelous
Sensational
Splendid
Superb
Terrific
Wonderful
Hot
Hawt
Keen
Nifty
Bonzer* (pronounced bonza)
Grouse*
Rule(s)
Rulez

By following these simple guidelines we will win over fans far and wide and greatly increase the success of 4th edition.

Sincerely,

Le Rouse

* Australia only

Awesome! Nothing gets critics of 4E onboard with the new edition like ridiculing them. That must be why you are the brand manager. Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant!

 

[The Ubbergeek]

Awesome! Nothing gets critics of 4E onboard with the new edition like ridiculing them. That must be why you are the brand manager. Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant!

The point is, the fandumbness - some critics are irrational and plan mean, hopeless.

I see frustration there.

I used to be simplistic 'bad corpo vs good fandom', but things in life can be complex, and when you find the dark sides of fandoms...