New Confessions: The Down & Under Adventurer

[helium3]

She's rousetastic. And she makes me feel the opposite of rousetastic.

Perhaps if you're nice, in her next column she'll have a pic photoshopped of herself in a chainmail bikini.

 

[Ruin Explorer]

Ugh - journeybread has been added to my list of stupid equipment that I refuse to acknowledge in games that I run. It joins such dumbness as:

Tindertwigs
Thunderstones
Tanglefoot bags
Sunrods
Probably other stuff that I'm forgetting at the moment

Seriously. It's amazing how Earthdawn was able to fill books with this kind of junk and never come up with anything remotely as lame as the stuff you've just mentioned. Yes to armour made from stones you press into your flesh and which turn blood-red. No to magic conveniences. I mean jeez, why don't we just give all the characters magic cell-phones, and maybe cars, would that be cool? /facedesk.

 

[Lackhand]

You guys really hate journeybread that much? Wow.

I really don't see the difference between journeybread and "iron rations", especially in the departments of portability, fungibility, nutrition, and spoilage. Oh, except "journeybread" comes from Tolkein, which is sort of a neutral statement, but I'm okay with it.

I do dearly loathe the thunderstone, but the rest of that equipment is completely fine to me.

What about hippogriffs at a thousand gold a pop?

 

[kennew142]

Seriously. It's amazing how Earthdawn was able to fill books with this kind of junk and never come up with anything remotely as lame as the stuff you've just mentioned. Yes to armour made from stones you press into your flesh and which turn blood-red. No to magic conveniences. I mean jeez, why don't we just give all the characters magic cell-phones, and maybe cars, would that be cool? /facedesk.

One person's lame is another person's cool. Personally, I like tindertwigs and sunrods. I may not be too fond of the concept of waybread/journeybread/whatever, but there are a lot of GMs and players who do like it. BTW, the armor you mentioned above seems way more lame to me than alchemical matches - but to each his own.

 

[cignus_pfaccari]

Seriously. It's amazing how Earthdawn was able to fill books with this kind of junk and never come up with anything remotely as lame as the stuff you've just mentioned. Yes to armour made from stones you press into your flesh and which turn blood-red. No to magic conveniences. I mean jeez, why don't we just give all the characters magic cell-phones, and maybe cars, would that be cool? /facedesk.

I dunno, the magical butane lighter was a bit modernish. 'People use it to light their stoves!'

Brad

 

[Ruin Explorer]

You guys really hate journeybread that much? Wow.

I really don't see the difference between journeybread and "iron rations", especially in the departments of portability, fungibility, nutrition, and spoilage. Oh, except "journeybread" comes from Tolkein, which is sort of a neutral statement, but I'm okay with it.

I do dearly loathe the thunderstone, but the rest of that equipment is completely fine to me.

What about hippogriffs at a thousand gold a pop?

It's laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame to make something "Magick" when something non-magic would do the job. Iron rations are fine, you can imagine them as a dozen different things (at least), and they're clearly something nobody wants to be eat, clearly inferior to normal food. Waybread is lame-o "everything made by elves is better" junk, it's not fun, it's not cool, it doesn't "enhance the D&D experience" (imho!), and it's existence would have an effect on society (which will no doubt be ignored). It's just another yawnsome prop to allow people to handwave the characters need to eat, but it's a lot more boring and MAGICKALELELEY than "iron rations". Imho, of course.

Oh well, just another example of the 4E philosophy of "If it ain't fantasy, make it fantasy!" I suppose. A more bitter man than me might be surprised humans made it into the PHB at all.

Hippogriffs are freakin' cheap at 1000g, if old prices hold. That might be more money than it used to be, though.

I dunno, the magical butane lighter was a bit modernish. 'People use it to light their stoves!'

I don't remember that, tbh >.> I'm sure it was there, though. Hey, in the real world, lighters predate matches, and at least ED tended to account for these things in describing their societies, and included things REAL PEOPLE would want, not just "adventurers" (like that bowl which heated itself up).

 

[jaer]

Well, the mention of journeybread made me pretty mad, so at least some of us can get upset about that sort of thing!

Oh well, easiest thing in the world to toss out, I'd imagine, but if I wanted to run LotR, I'd be running LotR. Waybread isn't cool. Unless maybe it's made by magic and ludicrously expensive.

Cause real-life human beings have never made thick unleaven bread before, yeah? Bread so dense, you're full after a couple bites of it (feels like lead in the stomach) and so flavorless there's no desire to eat more than that. Also, it's so dense and low on moisture, the stuff doesn't go stale or moldy for a real long time. And even if the edges harden, cut them off and the rest is still fine.

Tolkien didn't make up the idea of bread that survives journeys well and is very filling. It's up there with beef jerky as something people have done for a long time. The difference is, like with everything else, when Tolkien's elves did it, they did a much better job of it than humans, so the bread was still tasty and light and enjoyable to eat.

Travel bread isn't a Tolkien concept. This could just be 4e's attempt to have some food-stuffs that aren't simply described as "Iron Rations" and there might be nothing mystical about it.

 

[Ruin Explorer]

and there might be nothing mystical about it.

How much would you like to bet on that? Because I'm guessing you'd stake precisely nothing it being non-magical/elven

Tolkien's bread is clearly magical in that it gives people energy way beyond what some unleavened bread would, and substitutes for their need for protein, seemingly.

 

[EATherrian]

How much would you like to bet on that? Because I'm guessing you'd stake precisely nothing it being non-magical/elven

Tolkien's bread is clearly magical in that it gives people energy way beyond what some unleavened bread would, and substitutes for their need for protein, seemingly.

I'm voting for magical hard tack, with new improved Scurvy Rules!

 

[jaer]

How much would you like to bet on that? Because I'm guessing you'd stake precisely nothing it being non-magical/elven

Tolkien's bread is clearly magical in that it gives people energy way beyond what some unleavened bread would, and substitutes for their need for protein, seemingly.

Tolkien's bread clearly is.

I'm just not about to get upset at WotC for putting "Tolkien bread" into 4e based on the mention of Journey Bread, a concept that had been in use throughout human history. Will I bet money on the fact that WotC is making this stuff more than the bread of history past? No. But that doesn't mean I think this is elven waybread out of LotR.

Heck, I made a load of wheat bread last month that would qualify as Dwarven Battle Bread (just can't find vital wheat gluten at my local grocery store ). Stuff came out of the bread machine hard as a rock. Eat a piece for breakfast at 9:00, couldn't even think about eating anything until 2:00, and it's so packed with carbs, it really would keep someone going all day.

If anything, I'd be more upset at WotC for caving into the pressure of the food markets for adding in traveling carbs to the protein packed iron rations. After all, there is no such thing as an essential carb, but there are essencial amino acids and essencial fats, but what does WotC do? They bow to the all-power bread and pasta markets and add journey bread to what adventures should be eating while fighting monsters.

No more Akins diet for my fighters, no sir! Mearl wants them to eat grain! What a rip!