Let's admit some truths though. Old school D&D was dominated by white males. Mostly teenagers. That alone means that a whole lot of things that could be offensive weren't even noticed. There was no malice there. Or push to be racists or sexists. But by the very virtue of being white male dominated in the 70s and 80s, a lot of problematic things that impact people who aren't white males existed. We (white males) didn't notice them because we weren't impacted by them or saw how they impacted others. That doesn't make us bigots or racists. That makes us uninformed. And that isn't a bad thing. The only way it becomes bad is if we do become informed, yet continue to engage in problematic behavior.
This is an excellent way to put it. Thank you.
It is uncomfortable to be faced with one's own lack of understanding, with the possibility that something we care a lot about isn't as just as we thought. When that thing is part of our identity - we are GAMERS darn it - it feels like a challenge to ourselves.
When challenged, the first reaction most of us have is to defend and deny, to try to prove that it is not so, to make the source of the discomfort the enemy, shut up, go away, and leave us be. And maybe that'll work - faced with our defense, maybe the source shuts up, and leaves us in peace.
But, that defensive process doesn't change anything. We are the same. The thing we love is the same. The rest of the world is the same. So, it is very likely that we may have to confront the exact same thing all over again. Lather, rinse, repeat.
The defensive reaction gives us short-term psychological peace, but is a poor long-term strategy.