Agent Oracle
First Post
I saw this posted on another message board, and it got me so riled up that i had to repost it over here and disect the stupidity of it point-by-point.
That is because there are more pizza places than there are hospitals. And it is within my experience that the speed at which a pizza arrives at your door is directly impacted by the workload of the driver, whereas the speed at which an ambulence arrives at your door is directly impacted by the distance you are from the ambulance.
I presume that is because Handicapped parking legislation is universal and not situationally dependant. Also, perhaps the handicapped person has a relative or friend who wishes to skate, and they are there to watch. WOuld you punish a disabled person for having different intrests from their family and friends?
Oddly, this is beginning to remind me of a certain person's method of public speaking... a comedian of some form I presume, but back to the rebuttals:
The reasoning behind the placement of drugs relative to cigaretts is simple: security. The average pack of cigarettes costs less than five dollars. the average prescription pills cost hundreds. Also, by placing the pharmacy at the back of the store, any criminal with the intent to steal items from the pharmacy must walk through the whole of
No, I believe you will find people ordering this in many other countries as well. Some people, such as myself, prefer the flavor of a "diet" coke.
Possibly because the modern bank vault is largely empty... Surrounded by a dozen security cameras... covered by an armed guard (or two)... If anyone actually does attempt to rob them, there is a silent alarm, which summons every cop car in a twenty mile radius... And there are dye packs, which render cash unspendable.
Actual cash may be held in the vault briefly, but the majority of these finances are transported to a much more secure holding facility. A recent survey of criminals in jail for bank robbery discovered that over ninty percent of them had no plan going into the heist. As a matter of fact, the modern bank robbery is the single most botched crime in modern society.
Because said cars worth thousands of dollars weigh thousands of pounds, making them rather difficult to pick up and walk off with. Conversely, my lawn mower, which weighs about sixty pounds, and has easy-to-pull wheels, and no parking break... or alarm... yeah, you get the idea.[/quote]
[/quote]7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place. [/quote]
Ahhh! it's George Carlin! That's why this sounds so familiar. Okay, i can work with this now.
"Both features are optional. Many people use answering machines as a means of actually recording messages when they were out, and use call waiting to politely tell people that they are on the phone, so they can call them back and talk to them next.
It's a conspiracy. deal with it. Or do what I do, make sandwihes with surplus buns.
Bad joke, Involving a half-translated word.
I actually asked the man who designed the ATM about this. He told me that when they came right down to it, the keypads were a $1.35 plastic plate on a $65,000 machine. it was just easier to make one keypad and insert it into every machine, reguardless of where it goes. Plus, after hours, people can still walk up to those drive-through ATM's.
Some Mindless Sheep said:It's scary how true this is! I'd really like an answer to 3,4 and 5. Things that ought to make sense, for some reason just don't.)
1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
That is because there are more pizza places than there are hospitals. And it is within my experience that the speed at which a pizza arrives at your door is directly impacted by the workload of the driver, whereas the speed at which an ambulence arrives at your door is directly impacted by the distance you are from the ambulance.
I presume that is because Handicapped parking legislation is universal and not situationally dependant. Also, perhaps the handicapped person has a relative or friend who wishes to skate, and they are there to watch. WOuld you punish a disabled person for having different intrests from their family and friends?
Oddly, this is beginning to remind me of a certain person's method of public speaking... a comedian of some form I presume, but back to the rebuttals:
The reasoning behind the placement of drugs relative to cigaretts is simple: security. The average pack of cigarettes costs less than five dollars. the average prescription pills cost hundreds. Also, by placing the pharmacy at the back of the store, any criminal with the intent to steal items from the pharmacy must walk through the whole of
No, I believe you will find people ordering this in many other countries as well. Some people, such as myself, prefer the flavor of a "diet" coke.
Possibly because the modern bank vault is largely empty... Surrounded by a dozen security cameras... covered by an armed guard (or two)... If anyone actually does attempt to rob them, there is a silent alarm, which summons every cop car in a twenty mile radius... And there are dye packs, which render cash unspendable.
Actual cash may be held in the vault briefly, but the majority of these finances are transported to a much more secure holding facility. A recent survey of criminals in jail for bank robbery discovered that over ninty percent of them had no plan going into the heist. As a matter of fact, the modern bank robbery is the single most botched crime in modern society.
Because said cars worth thousands of dollars weigh thousands of pounds, making them rather difficult to pick up and walk off with. Conversely, my lawn mower, which weighs about sixty pounds, and has easy-to-pull wheels, and no parking break... or alarm... yeah, you get the idea.[/quote]
[/quote]7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place. [/quote]
Ahhh! it's George Carlin! That's why this sounds so familiar. Okay, i can work with this now.
"Both features are optional. Many people use answering machines as a means of actually recording messages when they were out, and use call waiting to politely tell people that they are on the phone, so they can call them back and talk to them next.
It's a conspiracy. deal with it. Or do what I do, make sandwihes with surplus buns.
Bad joke, Involving a half-translated word.
I actually asked the man who designed the ATM about this. He told me that when they came right down to it, the keypads were a $1.35 plastic plate on a $65,000 machine. it was just easier to make one keypad and insert it into every machine, reguardless of where it goes. Plus, after hours, people can still walk up to those drive-through ATM's.
