Playing it up - bad idea?

Philip said:
I don't know, but the whole issue seems rather stupid.

Does your DM ever dock INT when high Int PCs do stupid things?
Does your DM ever dock WIS when high Wis PCs act without common sense?

or even better:

Does your DM award additional CHA points when low Cha PCs act charismatic?
(same for Int or Wis)

If, as a player, you own mental 'scores' don't match with the mental ability scores written on your PCs sheet, you'd be hard-pressed to simulate them.

If your DM docks only Cha (and not Int and Wis) dependent on RP-ing, and does not award additional points in said scores for same RP-ing, he is clearly using a double standard.
The DM, as a general rule, doesn't dock points from people's scores.

However, he does hint to high intelligence characters that "stupid" things are in fact "stupid."

He does tell players whose high wisdom characters act impulsive or brash that they should reconsider.

And yes, the DM does award situational bonuses to charisma based checks if the character is acting unusually charismatic.
 

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Everyone has taken this up on the DMs side-- and, that's not what I'm most concerned about...

I am concerned about how to deal with my fellow players in the situation. I certainly don't want them to be upset with my character for acting overly bitchy-- but, she has in the past made very large efforts to be close, nice, and--above all else-- friendly with the other characters.
But, I still get the "your character is such a bitch" thing-- so, two sessions ago, I decided that I would try to fit that mold and now, have gotten a very negative response...
 

I understand, I had a problem with my high charisma Sorcerer as well, since I'm only of average charisma at best. :)

You can take it up with the other players and the DM, since in this case it is they who are not RP-ing their playing well. Their characters should be amazed at the subtle and convincing tone at which your character communicates, even though they, as players, might find the way you, as a player, RP your character b*tchy.

At least, maybe such a discussion should get them to think about your so-called bad RP-ing from another perspective.
 

Joining the chorus

For the classic example of an unattractive physical specimen who was also very unpleasant in a major way but who had the charisma to fascinate people with repulsive ideas and to attract an entire nation to his cause - Hitler. OK maybe not an entire nation but enough that he was elected very convincingly! Charisma was badly named from the start and is now something of a sacred cow that I can't see it being renamed. I don't think the Bard's suggestion of Chutzpah quite covers it (because that is also too specific in meaning) - I think it should just be called Personality

Anyway this isn't solving the problem

Not sure what the best plan to 'convert' your fellow players is. Discussing it OOC and using some of the arguements presented here sounds like the 'best' approach... but some may feel that you're getting on a high horse and 'lecturing them on how to play'. It really depends on the personalities of those that you're gaming with. I'd go along with the suggestion dumping the acting bitchy... afterall its only going to add to their perception of bitchiness. Beyond that it's hard to say without knowing your players.

Maybe ask your husband to throw in some characters that are obviously attracted to (and I mean socially/mentally not just physically) your character - want to engage her in conversation, go along with her suggestions for things.
 

This is just a thought, and I wanted to make sure this base was covered, but is it a possibility that the fellow players were "pulling your leg" in a "just one of the guys" sense, and are reacting as if you suddenly took the joke too seriously? If it is the case, then they could be joking about it - but then, you're the only one who could read that, given their body language (non-verbal communication) when they are bringing this point up. Even your husband, the DM, could be in on it. I just wanted to make sure they were serious about it, and not just doing a jerky "one of the gang" kind of thing. If there's one thing guys do well, it's go too far with practical jokes. :)

Past that, I wouldn't worry about their reactions, because just because someone has a high score in something, doesn't mean the PC's have to react that way, same as if you were trying to use diplomancy or intimidation on them. If the DM brings it up again, I'd remind him about ALL the definitions of Charisma, to settle the mechanical issue, but the players can roleplay as well or as poorly as they want. I'd ask them Out of Game if they have a problem with the way the character is being portrayed, and tell them that you are going for confident and assertive, and ask them for suggestions on how they would expect a confident and assertive woman to act, without being "witchy." The hemming and hawing on that question ought to be good for an hour's entertainment, anyway. :D
 
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Queen_Dopplepopolis said:
Everyone has taken this up on the DMs side-- and, that's not what I'm most concerned about...

I am concerned about how to deal with my fellow players in the situation. I certainly don't want them to be upset with my character for acting overly bitchy-- but, she has in the past made very large efforts to be close, nice, and--above all else-- friendly with the other characters.
But, I still get the "your character is such a bitch" thing-- so, two sessions ago, I decided that I would try to fit that mold and now, have gotten a very negative response...

Just my thoughts: ignore if they offend.

Docking your character's CHA is a bad call on the DM's part.

If you're unhappy with the situation and the group (presumably they are your friends) is unhappy with it, why take this to the extreme (i.e. "try to fit that mold")? It seems like just adding fuel to the fire rather than trying to improve the gaming experience for yourself and your friends.

I don't agree that a high Charisma score is a free pass for a player to portray an annoying (or worse) character and expect the rest of the party to grin and bear it because of what's rolled on the character sheet. There might be *some* validity to that for the characters although that situation would be short lived (i.e. a high Charisma jerk is still a jerk). I would roll my eyes (at best) at a player who portrayed an offensive character and then actually tried to argue something that boiled down to "But you have to like me - I have a 28 Charisma!"
 

The DM is a fair and decent guy-- anything that happens with my cha score is, based on circumstance, is justified. We've talked about that and, I've got no beef with him.

And, all our characters have "things"-- their trait that sets them apart from the other characters... so that, if we ever turn our game into a sitcom (long running joke) they can all have their little "thing"-- know what I mean?

However, after months of hearing that your character is a mega-witch, even when you're trying to NOT be that way (doing one on ones with the characters, trying to develop those relationships), it starts to sink in. And, I don't know if I even started being even witchier on purpose in the last few sessions... I was just trying to fill the role that they assigned to me and, it was a particular role play heavy couple of weeks... so, everything must have just come out wrong.

In short, Henry is probably right.
 

Because it may have been lost in the rest of the noise of my post ...

BardStephenFox said:
Your group wanted to stereotype your PC. You responded by filling that stereotype. They don't like it. Tell them to ease off the bitch comments and you will stop playing one. But do it nicely. :)

From what I am hearing, you think the other players have mis-perceived what you are trying to do. As Henry says, it could be a joke. But I can also see it being something else. They used to think she was bitchy because she was sometimes "short". Assuming your characterization of her behavior is correct, then the other players expect non-bitchy women to never be short. Sounds like an idealized stereotype to me. I could try to psychoanalyze this. I could offer all sorts of perceived social commentary. But who cares?

Play your character the way you want. So what if she is "short"? If the other players think that is bitchy, don't tolerate it. Call them on it, politely. Ask them why that makes your PC bitchy. Point out that you can, and have, played your PC as bitchy and they didn't like it. Tell them what personality archtype you are reaching for. Tell them that you are part of the game as well and you are not going to mold your PC to their expectations. Because right now, with them commenting that your PC was bitchy, you are not enjoying the game. Why play if you aren't going to enjoy it?
 

Ridiculous. Being nice and agreeable to all creatures is called 'Diplomacy', not Charisma, in D&D.
There is no way you should get docked Charisma for not playing a 'nice' character. Stalin (and many other politicians) was charismatic and in no way 'nice'. There are lots of examples of beautiful Hollywood bitches that had people hanging on their every word.
However your Cha is absurdly high unless you are in a high power game. Perhaps this (and a suspicion of favouritism) is the real problem in the perception of your group.
 

The first time I heard Justice characterized as a b*tch was from you. We were discussing character theme songs and you had chosen "Cold Hearted B*tch" because, as you said, she is.

Now, up until that point, I had never considered to be such. She's forceful and intimidating, yes. The thing that I think you're missing is that what the PC's would characterize as b*tchiness, you characterize as motherly. I can see Justice as being a "motherly" character; however, she's only 18. And aside from perhaps Kaereth, she's the youngest person in the group. Thus, Justice's motherliness can be and is often taken the wrong way.

Up until 2 sessions ago, neither Xath(PC) nor Gertie(player) would have considered Justice to be a b*tch. But then, in the midsts of a tense diplomatic confrontation with an emmisary of evil, you undermine all of Xath's arguements by telling said emmisary that she is a fool, not only once, but TWICE while Xath was attempting to gain some information from him, completely undermining (in my opinion) Xath's position as a respected member of the circle. That, to me, was the first time that I would have ever considered that Justice earned her theme song.

I think the b*tch thing is meant to be taken lightly. It's a joke, like Archon's perpetual broodiness or Xath's inability to do anything as well as Penny. Don't take it seriously, and if you (Liz the person) have issues with us joshing around, just tell us. We can tone it down.

Certainly don't change Justice into what you think we think she should be. She's fine just the way you want to play her....although she and Xath are going to have words about the fool thing. ;)
 

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