D&D General Rant: Sometimes I Hate the D&D Community

[Dannyalcatraz]

Seems you failed this time.

Mod Note:

That’s getting a bit personal, especially since in the part you’re responding to, the poster asked for a PM reminder.

 

[Greggy C]

I've made lifelong friends here. Been to their homes and vice versa. I guess you get out of it what you put in. Sorry to hear you haven't made any friends.

Certainly wasn't my purpose coming, I'm sure you have made a lot of money off of those friends.

 

[Grendel_Khan]

Creating an anon account on enworld, nah. Nobody actually cares about anyone else, everyone is generally just here for their own reasons, mostly to advertise, a few like to write opinions. Some just like to hear a little bit of news. Some just procrastinating.

I get into my fair share of tussles here, but I've also benefited from lots of amazing insights and advice, and gotten some much-needed and appreciated support. You don't have to like the idea of it as a community, but it is if you want it to be.

 

[Morrus]

Certainly wasn't my purpose coming, I'm sure you have made a lot of money off of those friends.

I think I've figured out why you haven't made any friends.

 

[payn]

Fellowship of Enworld... right.

I agree the 0.01% that meet at conventions more than once are a community. Going once to look around, meh. Creating an anon account on enworld, nah. Nobody actually cares about anyone else, everyone is generally just here for their own reasons, mostly to advertise, a few like to write opinions. Some just like to hear a little bit of news. Some just procrastinating.

Sounds like a community.

 

[Levistus's_Leviathan]

So people shouldn't express their opinion on aspects of the game for fear of offending someone else?

That's not at all what the OP said.

Yea, I know. But you wouldn't believe how often people get offended by someone expressing their opinion on an aspect of the game. (That has nothing to do with person A telling person B that their play style is wrong)

That . . . that was like the whole point of the OP.

1) That people need to stop being so judgemental of someone else's subjective playstyle (applying to everyone)

and

2) That the fact that someone else prefers a different playstyle to you is not an attack on your own.

If you read "hey, can we stop trying to gatekeep the hobby?" as "stop sharing your opinions about the game" . . . maybe the problem isn't the OP.

 

[AbdulAlhazred]

Note: If you have never participated in any of the acts I'm complaining about below, this post is not directed at you. Good job at not being amongst the people in this hobby that actively piss me off by making it toxic. You're cool and are not the target of this post.

I . . . I don't understand certain people in the D&D community, and it's quite frustrating. We constantly fight over nothing, write thousands of words in huge posts about why someone else's style of play is badwrongfun, and whine about minor changes in the game as if they're the end of the hobby.

The Edition Wars are stupid. Play whatever edition you like and stop caring if other people like an edition you don't. 1e, 2e, 3e/3.5e, 4e, 5e, or either edition of Pathfinder. Play whatever you like. I don't care, and so long as you can play what you like, you shouldn't care either. I can understand being disappointed if a specific setting, race, or class was never updated to your favorite edition of the game. Or if the online implementation of the game you play changes. But people getting into heated debates about whether 4e was objectively bad, if 3.5e is better than 5e, if any edition of D&D made by Wizards of the Coast even counts as D&D, or if Pathfinder counts as D&D is just pointless, and has does a ton to harm and divide the community. Play Pathfinder if you like Pathfinder. Play whatever you like and ignore all the jerks telling you that you're objectively wrong for liking it.

The same applies to settings, races, classes, and so on. People in this hobby really need to stop being so judgmental of other people for liking completely subjective preferences that have nothing to do with them. If someone likes playing magitek crafters (Artificers) and magic "robot"-people (Warforged), they are not wrong for liking those things. If I like Eberron, Spelljammer, and that Critical Role setting (Exandria), I am not wrong for liking it, even if you don't think it fits D&D or don't enjoy playing in that setting. If someone likes Dragonlance or the Forgotten Realms or a Magic: the Gathering setting, they are not wrong for liking that setting, even though I am not fond of it.

If something changes in a new printing of the thing I like or a setting is updated in a way I don't like, I can ignore it and use the older version. If they publish more Forgotten Realms adventures, I can just not buy them. If the reprints of 5e's Core Rulebooks change a rule/option I like, I'll use the older version. If they publish a Manual of the Planes and retcon Githyanki and Githzerai into two more elf subraces, I can ignore that and use the older versions. I'm not going to make a big fuss or refuse to buy the book over one minor piece I don't like if it has other parts I can use. If they completely change ability score generation in 6e to only being based around rolling dice, I'm going to ignore it and just use Standard Array/Point Buy.

I like optimizing the characters that I play. I like finding mechanical quirks that go together in interesting/unique ways and play a character competently built for combat. That doesn't mean I dislike roleplay, I love roleplay, but I also enjoy the "game" parts of the hobby as well as the other parts. My playstyle might be different from yours, and we might not be able to play at the same table because of that, but my version isn't badwrongfun and neither is yours*.

I'm certainly not going to demand that a setting/race/class never gets published again, or say that the game is ruined forever because of one minor change, or say that playing the game in a different way from me is objectively badwrongfun. I'm just going to continue enjoying the hobby and playing how I want to play.

I'm just a guy that likes gnomes, artificers, Eberron, optimizing, and playing 5th Edition. And there's nothing wrong with that, just like there's nothing wrong with liking Kobolds, Bards, Dragonlance, prioritizing roleplay, and playing 3.5e. And the people in this hobby that non-jokingly tell people that they're wrong for liking any of that can mind their own goddamn business.

And I hold myself to this standard, too. If I ever forget this and act like any part of this post isn't true, remind me. And if you feel that I've acted differently in the past, PM me.

* There is a small exception here, which is someone that plays the game in a way that actively hurts other people. If your game is racist, sexist, or otherwise offensive/harmful, you are not protected by the "it's just a different playstyle" defense.

I'm sure I'm hardly adding much here at this point, but I will say, I think basically you are complaining about the Human Race in general. Probably the best we can do in any constructive sense is to try to figure out how to talk to each other in a more constructive way.

 

[Guest 7034872]

EN World is the only reason I finally managed to write the adventure I wrote for my D&D buddies: I absolutely regard this place as a community and a helpful one at that.

 

[AbdulAlhazred]

That's not at all what the OP said.

That . . . that was like the whole point of the OP.

1) That people need to stop being so judgemental of someone else's subjective playstyle (applying to everyone)

and

2) That the fact that someone else prefers a different playstyle to you is not an attack on your own.

If you read "hey, can we stop trying to gatekeep the hobby?" as "stop sharing your opinions about the game" . . . maybe the problem isn't the OP.

I think the problem is, often one person says "A" and the next person posts "No, I like B" and then if the first person says something about "B" there's likely to be TWO people who each think the other is dissing their style, whereas most likely it is zero.

 

[Greggy C]

I think I've figured out why you haven't made any friends.

Don't be upset, its not specific to Enworld. I just take issue with the word "community". Am I part of the "windows community" because I use MS Windows. IPhone community cause I bought a phone. If you make one post on Reddit, now you are in the reddit community? Its so broadly used, its overused.

Every vendor, every org wants to say you are a valued customer and "part of their community" so they can sell more products.
You want to sell advertising so you need to engage people with catchy news headlines and start fun topics so people can discuss.

Your community paid for enworld I think I read somewhere, thats a little dedication I think, and sure if you visit their house, like a convention, thats a real community because its in person.