Rules for a new D&D group

[Ylis]

I was kind of put off by the formality of the rules, too. However, I play with people I've known for many years. Our motto is "Mi casa es tu casa." The only other rule we have is "Clean up, you pigs!"

Now, since these rules are for brand new and unknown people, I think this is not only very courteous, but also very smart to do. I mean, this will turn off most of the rabble, ensuring that you'll have a better chance of good roleplayers. Also, it can prevent some nasty surprises down the road (such as the allergies thing...).

So, since these rules are meant for scouting out prospective players and kind of getting what the group is about out of the way in one fell swoop, I'd say it looks good. I wouldn't put too much more, though - you've address the "group issues". "In-house" issues should be dealt with in person, since they might change from location to location (if you ever change houses/hosts).

The only other thing I can say is: Man, I wish I had some pagan role-players in my area You can barely find one or the other around here <sigh>

 

[Henry]

I think it's a good idea to set out the rules ahead of time if you are indeed gaming with strangers or vague acquaintences - not surprises that way. Usually, I won't invite someone to our table unless another group member recommends them beforehand, but your circumstances are a bit different. Sounds like a good set of up-front notices.

Only suggestion: See if you can trim the wording a bit if you think it's possible. A lot of people might be turned off if you hand them anything over 1 page; for just rules on getting together, anything over an 8.5 x 5.5 sheet might be disconcerting.

 

[jmucchiello]

I too would be put off by such formal rules. If you were hosting a New Year's Eve or Superbowl (or similar) party and some friends of friends (who you don't really know) were invited, would you write up similar rules and distribute them? I don't think such behavior would get high marks in an etiquette book. Why is gaming, also a social party, any different?

 

[MerakSpielman]

Well, I've heard a lot of stories, just here at ENworld, about problematic/jerk players ruining things for everybody else, or blowing off the game to go partying, or hitting on the other players during the game.

Remember, I'm likely not inviting people that are already friends of mine here. I'm putting out an open call and taking pot luck. I think it's prudent to lay down a few general rules for people who you've never seen or gamed with before.

 

[diaglo]

If you were hosting a New Year's Eve or Superbowl (or similar) party and some friends of friends (who you don't really know) were invited, would you write up similar rules and distribute them?

why yes i have written up rules for such parties. who's bringing what? how many are coming? how long are they staying? is there a designated driver? etc...

 

[MerakSpielman]

Only suggestion: See if you can trim the wording a bit if you think it's possible. A lot of people might be turned off if you hand them anything over 1 page; for just rules on getting together, anything over an 8.5 x 5.5 sheet might be disconcerting.

OK, I'll just switch it to 5-point font....

I go overboard when I write anything. I'm a technical editor - so things probably end up more formal and lengthly than I expect.

Why is gaming, also a social party, any different?

Interesting. I always thought of gaming as more of a club than a party...

 

[Keith]

I agree with the line of thinking that standards this formalized are inappropriate to present to new guests in your home. So many of them should go without saying between mature people, and are thus a little insulting to receive instruction on without provocation.
If there are going to be some difficulties with a new person adapting to the environment, a document like this won’t prevent them. It will certainly send people who are comfortable with, and proud of, their character running screaming from the game, I think. I get the sense that you are likely a laid-back group, but oddly enough stating so in a very formal and possibly slightly holier-than-thou, or more-pagan-than-thou, as the case may be , manner might be the wrong way to go.

Of all that is there, I think you owe it to yourself and your prospective guests only to discuss the actually environment, and in a more polite way. Warn people that if they have allergies to pets that they might need to take some medication to get through a session, that they must be comfortable with children as they are welcome, and that there is no smoking. What people consume before they arrive should not really occur to you to be your business, in my view. If you don’t like a guest’s behavior, by all means ask them to leave. Ask them not to drink before they come over? Might not seem too friendly to a stranger.

I respect the seriousness of finding suitable people; I just suggest you determine it a little more informally by allowing each person a chance to attend a game. The game-related items can be covered then, in a relaxed fashion. If necessary- let’s face it, if you don’t think the person fits in, why bother covering the details of the game in advance any more than if it were a poker game?

Best of luck with your efforts!

Cheers

 

[Gnarlo]

I'd agree it's a little long and a little too formal, but otherwise I think it's a very good thing to get all this out in the open up front; it certainly lets anyone know what to expect. As far as points people have raised:

a) He's not hosting a New Year's Eve or Super Bowl party; this is presumably a group of people to be seen on a frequent, regular basis. A lot can be tolerated for one evening that won't fly week in and week out.

b) It's totally appropriate to tell people whether or not they can show up stoned or drunk to his house. No where in there does he tell them they can't drink, smoke, or shoot up on their free time, he just expects them to be straight when they show up at his place.

Unfortunately, I've met a lot of gamers that you have to lay down the law up front like this to (although, stereotypes aside, not most). It's led to me basically only playing with people I get to know as people before I get to know them as gamers.

But I do agree that it needs to be a little less formal, a little more "no smoking or showing up drunk, please, and you got to be ok with kids being around the house" instead of Article 6, Paragraph 3, Point 14/J

 

[Stockdale]

Merak, I think your rules area little - ahh - strict as written. From your brief write-up, the information conveyed to me was "we're prude, elitist role players looking for same. Commitment required." I certainly did not get the vibe that y'all were "laid back" and out for a good time. I'd go back for a second wack at writing the rules. As my first editor always said: "Now that you've said what you want. Say what you should." I think you'll get more bites if you simply tone down the language. This could be easily phrased as "serious gamers seeking new players. Must have own copy of 3.5 rules. We play at our house in Albuquerque. Our house is smoke and alcohol free. We have pets, including children." With the second to last sentence, I would be surprised if you got any responses from any drug users.

I played in that group of strangers game cited by Josh earlier. It was my introduction to many of the players. If the rules you drafted had passed to me prior to last Saturday’s game, I would not have attended. It is difficult enough meeting new people. Moreso, if they expect you be Christ when you walk in the door. You just can't live up to that.

Anyway - my two cents.

 

[Kesh]

I would reword #7 to include folks who have the SRD, but not the physical Player's Handbook. I'm personally going to sell off my three core books and just use the SRD, since I need the cash.