The following I posted on ENWorld last year, when this very thing came up. It followed a post of Buttercup's at that time.
I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did writing it...
-------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------------------------
Buttercup said:
Say it ain't so! I hope to be still playing in the assisted living center, if I can find a bunch of other old coots to play with. I mean, what else will I have to do? It sure beats watching soap operas.
I just got the weirdest image in my head...
Scene: Sunny Pines Assisted living center
Time: 50 years hence
Eric: All right, you old pirate, roll to hit the beholder!
Piratecat: An 18! Hot crap on a stick!
Eric: You lucky old coot! *wheeze*
Darkness: He's pretty hot with those dice tonight, isn't he? Look at the wild spin he gives 'em before they land! Old boy must be cheating or something!
Gargoyle: Oh, he's been that way ever since the palsy set in. We just let him spin.
Piratecat: All right, that's a hit with my my fal- my fal- whatever you call the thing, my Big curved sword-thing! For
(rolls) 11 points of damage! All right! *wheeze*
Eric: All right, you wounded him pretty badly - let's see - confound it, I can't read the hit-point totals - left muh bi-focals on the canasta table...
Gargoyle: That's 43 damage total, Eric.
Darkness: Right it is -
(checks init) my action, and I want to - use a domain spell!
Eric: you Forgetful Nelly, they REMOVED Domain spells in 36th edition!
Darkness: Oh. Yeah.
Eric: Gargoyle?
Gargoyle: I'm gonna call it a night, Eric. My Siatica is acting up again, and I've got that date with Ashtal again! We're going to go cruising the game stores and feed the pigeons!
Eric: Oh, fine then. Piratecat, you old galoot, it's your turn again.
Piratecat: I rear up, *wheeze* I raise my Falchion, *wheeze*and I say... *wheeze* *thump!!*
Gargoyle: Kevin, you all right?
Darkness: (checks for breathing) He's dead, Jim. That last dice roll must have done him in.
Eric: Oh, well.... Oh, Crap! Where am I going to find a new player now to take over his character?
Darkness: I hear Henry is available - as long as he changes his oxygen tank every couple of hours, he's a spunky puppy!
Eric: Great! I'll call him tomorrow! Now we got to call an orderly about Piratecat. One thing - could somebody help me pry the dice from his fingers? Those are some perfectly good dice...