Charwoman Gene
Adventurer
So, I have a friend...
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So I have this friend...
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Spinachcat
First Post
Do they have children?
If yes, then they need counseling.
If no, they need a quick divorce. Life's too short for this nonsense.
If yes, then they need counseling.
If no, they need a quick divorce. Life's too short for this nonsense.
family comes first, he should focus his resources and time on that but HE has to want it.
A man can not be a man if he is not in control of his own domain, he needs to be looking at stepping up and getting out and a place for him and his wife, even if it means him getting a second job. I will also say, he MAY need to see someone about his issues.
A man can not be a man if he is not in control of his own domain, he needs to be looking at stepping up and getting out and a place for him and his wife, even if it means him getting a second job. I will also say, he MAY need to see someone about his issues.
kmdietri
Explorer
Well said.
malraux
First Post
Well, there's a lot to unpack here. First, clearly gaming itself isn't the root issue. Its a whole bunch of other stuff.
Next, he should go see a doctor about an evaluation for a mood disorder.
Third, divorce is an option. From what you've described, he sounds like a bit of a jerk, which is being exacerbated by horrible conditions. I dunno if he's always that way, or the really tight financials are just stressing him out, but from what you describe, clearly that marriage isn't working for either of them.
Fourth, marriage counseling.
Next, he should go see a doctor about an evaluation for a mood disorder.
Third, divorce is an option. From what you've described, he sounds like a bit of a jerk, which is being exacerbated by horrible conditions. I dunno if he's always that way, or the really tight financials are just stressing him out, but from what you describe, clearly that marriage isn't working for either of them.
Fourth, marriage counseling.
as a random stranger on the Internet ....
family first. game/gaming is still (by definition) a game (it shouldn't be more than maybe once a month as stress relief if other things are still 'in the air'; or more frequent if it's an activity they can do (and enjoy) together))
since they have both chosen to be very religious, that may be a good starting point of common ground to build/rebuild their relationship.
while i'm no psychologist, it does seem like if they can't get some basic agreement on needs and expectations of marriage covered then things are just going to get worse. end result: separation/divorce or counseling.
family first. game/gaming is still (by definition) a game (it shouldn't be more than maybe once a month as stress relief if other things are still 'in the air'; or more frequent if it's an activity they can do (and enjoy) together))
since they have both chosen to be very religious, that may be a good starting point of common ground to build/rebuild their relationship.
while i'm no psychologist, it does seem like if they can't get some basic agreement on needs and expectations of marriage covered then things are just going to get worse. end result: separation/divorce or counseling.
frankthedm
First Post
Then he should be serious enough about fulfilling the Oaths he took at the marriage ceremony.
I'm not big on therapy or consoling and the like, but if they feel they have to stay together, outside intervention of some type sounds in order.
renau1g
First Post
Yeah, gaming ain't the problem, or at least the real problem. This forum is likely not a great venue for solutions. A psychiatrist or marriage counseller seems the best course of action. If he is treating her as poorly as it seems by this post, then their incompatibility seems to be pretty strong and likely they shouldn't stay together, but there's always 2 sides to every story and this has only been heard from your friends side.
Lord above! I think the guy possibly needs counselling with regard to mood issues and work relatred stess. He also needs to decide if he is actually serious about the marrige because it will not last long te way its going.
If he is serious about keeping the marrige going then counselling is probaby required there also.
If he is serious about keeping the marrige going then counselling is probaby required there also.
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