So I have this friend...

[Sunseeker]

Your friend needs therapy. Ideally, someone who is actually trained to deal with the issues that are going on in this guy's brain. At the very least, he needs to drop gaming PERMANENTLY until things are more stable with his wife and his work. In the meantime he should try talking to a life coach who could give him some guidelines on how to organize his life better.

 

[Subtlepanic]

Again, coming from a random stranger on the internet:

This guy is not "your friend". Every way you describe him is negative. This isn't the language of a friend. You're dishing out his dirt on a forum. In fact, you seem to take his wife's side on every issue. You're unusually sympathetic to her...

Sorry, that's just what I read. =P

 

[Dausuul]

Holy hell.

Your friend needs therapy. Ideally, someone who is actually trained to deal with the issues that are going on in this guy's brain. ... In the meantime he should try talking to a life coach who could give him some guidelines on how to organize his life better.

Yeah, this. Although I will say that if he can't muster the determination to start fixing his life, nobody else can do it for him. Therapists and life coaches can show him how to fix his life--and that's clearly something he is in dire need of--but if he's not ready to listen to them, it won't do any good.

 

[Charwoman Gene]

This guy is not "your friend". Every way you describe him is negative. This isn't the language of a friend.

God, imagine what he must think of me!

 

[Subtlepanic]

God, imagine what he must think of me!

So, hold on, what's actually the point?

Oh, wait.. /changes channel

 

[pawsplay]

Therapy. On the gaming front, the fact that he's resorted to deception suggests makes this sound like addiction.

 

[Herremann the Wise]

Both "ROb" and his wife sound desperately unhappy. He's looking for any kind of pick-me-up in the hole he has found himself in. Going to and wanting to go to games is just exacerbating and straining their situation. To sort themselves out they need to:

- Work out the general direction they are going to both go in (hopefully together and hopefully forward).

- Look for ways how they can achieve that direction emotionally, financially and I suppose for them spiritually.

- If when asked what things he likes doing or wants to do with his wife, he struggles to come up with things then he does need to re-evaluate the marriage and professional counselling is the first stop on that bus ride (to hell and back as it were).

- They both need to make commitments to each other and stick to them. If they can't do that, a separation seems the only way that they can both move forward.

- Tell him that running away from everything by closeting yourself in your Dad's basement and playing WoW/gaming/working all day is not a real solution to his problems.

Best Regards
Herremann the Wise

 

[Oryan77]

Tell him to quit his job.

Tell her to apply for his job.

Then he can play D&D all day and live in the basement. And she can go to work and get out of the house.

 

[Khazan]

God, imagine what he must think of me!

So.... you're the guy. I see, hmm.

I gotta say, i don't quite get this whole thread then. Is it just me or does this seem like completely....weird?

If all of the stuff that you laid out in your post is true, then your problems, as others have noted, are way deeper than gaming. What i don't get is the whole "I have this friend..." thing and the quote above... I mean, is this all meant to be taken in a humorous way? Is it a joke? I see by your profile that you also Tweeted that you were saying goodbye to Twitter too, so I guess it's not.

Sorry, I'm confused.

 

[jonesy]

Is it just me or does this seem like completely....weird?

Nah. Just a good way to get a sounding board for your situation. And he seems to be well aware of it already. Which is the first step.

All the best to you, Charwoman Gene. I hope everything turns out well for you.