Here's what I think was my personal best from the 1st ENWorld Parady Contest.
Karaoke Night at the Morrus Household
(Eric is Isaac Hayes & his Grandmother sings back up).
Here it is: the Theme from ENWorld, one night only, with all apologies to the Funk.
[Eric]
Who's the white gamer tech that's a sex machine to all the gamer chicks?
Morrus!
[Grandma]
Ya… Oh, I can’t say that word. Who uses language like that in a song? (It’s all right grandma, just say something else, OK?). Well, OK. Ummm, Ya dang right!
[Eric]
Who is the gamer that would risk his dice for his brother gamer?
Morrus!
[Grandma]
Can you dig it? Dig what? Were his dice buried? (It just a saying grandma, let’s keep going). Ok, if that’s what the kids are saying nowdays, but it still doesn’t make any sense.
[Eric]
Who's the cat that won't cop out when there's viruses all about?
Morrus!
[Grandma]
Right On! Morrus is such a hardworking young man. (Stick to the script, please Grandma).
[Eric]
They say this cat Morrus is a bad mother . . . Bad mother…. Ummm, line grandma.
[Grandma]
Oh, sorry, I was just confused. Morrus is such a nice young man. He’ll make a wonderful father. Why, he couldn’t even be a mother anyway. Let alone a bad one. This song just doesn’t make any sense.
[Eric]
Grandma, you’re supposed to cut in with ‘Shut Your Mouth” before I finish saying ‘Bad mother *BLEEP*’. Oops.
[Grandma]
"SHUT YOUR MOUTH!" I’m going to wash your mouth out with soap for that young man!
[Eric]
But, I'm talkin' 'bout Morrus.
[Grandma]
Then we can dig it, but you’re still sitting in a corner with soap young man!
[Eric]
He's a complicated man, but no one understands him but his server
Admin Morrus!
[Grandma]
This is why I keep a Irish Spring bar in my purse. Now come over here young man! What is a sex machine anyway? Is that like the woman doctor? I had no idea Morrus was a doctor. Now that's a career! Why can't you be more like your doctor friend Morrus?
Umm, Sorry Folks. American Idol it ain't (Actually, it's a lot better than 90% of AI Contestants).
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