Ariddrake said:
Preach on brother!
I second this! Your situation afflicts many players in our hobby. Our group has had absolutely no success from posting ads online (including all of the boards mentioned) or at FLGS. While we get many new players that way they never last more than a few sessions. The problem has always been compatibility, in game and out.
In game compatibility is easier to deal with (if both sides are willing to compromise) but out of game compatibility is a killer. OP described out of game compatibility quite well as far as scheduling goes--varying levels of interest, although I would add another category: the player that wants to play several times a week (guys in their 20's and 30's!!!).
My current group works because:
1) We are friends even when we don't play D&D together.
2) We respect each other and are considerate of each other. We treat our game sessions as we would a job. No one would ever just not show up or be late without calling.
3) We all have professional jobs (no shift work, are flexible and understanding when others have to work overtime)
4) We all have similar family situations: family responsibilities that keep us from playing too often but still allow us to play on a regular (if infrequent) basis.
5) We all have other interests and hobbies, many of them shared. (no one gets disgruntled when we don't play very often and help us keep in touch)