The gaming group's divorce is finalized

[Rechan]

I'll side on the "You did nothing wrong, except perhaps make him feel unwanted".

My suggestion? Give him a few days, then call him and tell him how you feel. Just "Hey, I feel like I may have done a faux pas there - are we cool, man?"

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

For 20 years, I've gamed with a guy who only plays D&D.

When the group wants to play something else, he doesn't join us.

I still see him and do other things with him during those periods...I'm going bowl with him right now, for instance.

But for him, role-playing IS D&D...and not 4Ed BTW. (I don't care for 4ED either, but I'd play it.)

You did nothing wrong. Don't try to convert him. Just be open to joining his 3.X game if and when he decides to start one up.

 

[Remathilis]

Yes. Currently.

My group (as of the end of my 3.5 game, June/08) was 5 willing and able players.

Now?

1.) Player Had to Quit because of family/work issues (aka real life). Down one player.
2.) One is Gung-ho and even running his own Realms game.
3.) One is a fence-sitter who doesn't prefer it 3.5, but is willing to play still.
4.) One doesn't care for the system and hasn't bothered to learn it. Complains when his 3.5 mastery is "wrong".
5.) One actively hates the system and is teetering on staying home and playing WoW. The only reason he's still coming (as of this moment, might change at any time) is player 3.

So the 3e/4e switch is tearing my game group apart, same as yours. I empathize with ya.

 

[Wormwood]

Eh, you didn't do anything wrong. And neither did the old DM.

Exactly.

The last thing you need to feel is guilty.

Instead, just enjoy your game and make sure it rocks on toast for your group!

 

[Frostmarrow]

I simply cannot grasp why someone would not play a game to avoid a rules-set. The rules is not the game. The rules is not the fun. The fun is to meet with friends who share a common interest and roll dice.

 

[rounser]

I simply cannot grasp why someone would not play a game to avoid a rules-set. The rules is not the game. The rules is not the fun. The fun is to meet with friends who share a common interest and roll dice.

The rules can kill the fun, if you don't believe in the world they represent. I don't believe in the new implied setting. It's phoney to me.

It may be just an excuse to get together, ultimately, but that attractiveness is still critical...same reason I don't get together with friends to play monopoly, I guess - none of us are enthusiastic about the idea of playing that game or investing time in it.

 

[MadMaxim]

I simply cannot grasp why someone would not play a game to avoid a rules-set. The rules is not the game. The rules is not the fun. The fun is to meet with friends who share a common interest and roll dice.

Well, I guess it's like playing with action figures. Boys will rather play with Action Man than with Barbie dolls. You may be able to play out the same action-packed scenario, but it just doesn't feel right with Barbie dolls. I think the game system makes a huge difference. It's true that in the overall scheme of things it shouldn't really matter. You can roleplay without any system at all, but a set of rules establishes the basic way of interacting with the game and if you don't like the system (for whatever reason), it's going to be harder to over that hurdle and roleplay and enjoy yourself.

 

[MadMaxim]

Anyway, I'm sorry to hear about you losing the DM, Halivar, but the show must go on. People switch editions and the game continues to evolve.

 

[wedgeski]

I gotta be honest and say that if you friend used language like, "I don't like 4E very much and want to stay home and play WoW instead..", then I would guess the likelihood is that he wanted to stay home and play WoW no matter what, and that his vague dislike of 4E -- especially given his enthusiastic contribution on the preview game -- is something of a strawman. However, as you say, a person is entitled to do what they want with their time and shouldn't feel obliged to itemise their reasons if they don't want to. And I just could be completely wrong.

 

[aboyd]

I simply cannot grasp why someone would not play a game to avoid a rules-set. The rules is not the game. The rules is not the fun. The fun is to meet with friends who share a common interest and roll dice.

The fun is what each person defines as fun, so they may not be on board for your definition. And that would explain why someone would not play a game to avoid a rules-set.