I would say its semantics; which is the bedrock of things so it seems.
If a game you are playing has no win state, isn't it just an activity you are engaging in to pass the time?
Someone who thinks there's something at stake in insisting that RPGs are not
games, but rather
activities, must think the semantics
matter. Otherwise why would they care? I'm engaging with that person.
I've played backyard cricket, and kick-to-kick, with no ultimate win-state. But there are rules-structured outcomes, that establish local success conditions: eg being bowled, hitting the fence for six, hitting into the neighbour's yard for six-and-out, etc. And RPGing likewise has rule-structured outcomes that establish local success conditions eg succeeding on a roll against a DC, or surviving a combat, etc.
A marginal case of success conditions, in a RPG-adjacent game, is fond in A Penny for My Thoughts <
A Penny for My Thoughts - Wikipedia>: if the active player, at the appropriate juncture, chooses your offered thought over that of another player, you get a token (and the tokens structure the play sequence).
And in more mainstream RPGs, that rely on a GM/player role divide, as well as rules-structured success there is also the success of
discovering the information that is hidden at the outset of play - eg successfully mapping the dungeon, or solving a mystery in CoC, etc.
The perfectly good English word for describing this sort of activity is
game
.
Hmm.
I mean, gamification is a real term. "Let's make a game of it" is a real-world phrase that has meaning.
And the implication of those terms and phrases is that something can be added to a non-game activity to turn it into something that is recognizably a game.
And that something to add, usually, would be some sort of metric by which progress and success can be measured.
So the implication of "RPGs are activities, not games" is that there is no definable metric by which "success" or "progress" can measured or evaluated.
As per what I've just posted, there is a lot of
success or
progress in a lot of RPGing.
But not all game play requires success or progress. When my daughter was younger, she would play (what she called) "imagination games" with her friends. I did the same thing when I was in primary school. These games didn't have success conditions. But they have a degree of structure to the activity, including informal rules and principles that govern role adoption and role expression.
They're different, in that respect, from (say) passing the time just by throwing rocks at s sign or into a pond. Of course, these latter activities can
become games if we start scoring etc. But being sufficient to make something a game, doesn't mean its necessary.