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Under A Darksun: PART I SEGMENTS 1-124
- Thread starter megamania
- Start date
megamania
Hero
UNDER A DARKSUN
SEGMENT 022
“Tombs & Traps”
“I can’t see guys!”, Mania hurriedly and harshly says. He does all he can to aviod sneezing but fails. A plumb of fine dust sprays into the air striking to his damp face. “Wait…maybe I can see something.”
Behind him both Dutch and Dity Dogg look at each other as they try figure out how to get the lit torch to Mania.
“You can see…?” Dogg questions.
Dutch waves it away. He is beginning to suspect he must always be prepared for surprises when dealing with this enigmatic young man. “What do you see?”
“No details…just suddenly I went from seeing nothing to seeing the outlines of an archway and a hallway.” Mania pulls himself through the 2ft by 4ft opening set at the base of the floor. “Wow!…I can see even more now that the torch light is shining through.” He dusts himself off then kneels down to take the torch.
“The boy is crazy…he fits well with us,” Dogg comments before sliding under the wall. Dutch, being so much larger of a man just squeezes through. His heavy waist belt snagging on the brick.
Before Dutch can get to his feet he fears Dogg cry out. “Ah! Your eyes Mania…They glow like magic!”
Dutch stands upright as Mania is waving his hand before his eyes then gently to them. “Ah- that burns!”
“Then stop putting dusty fingers in your eyes,” Dutch looks around surveying the space. “It is now clear you have the Will & the Way Mania. I have seen this before. You have Starlight vision or Elf Sight as some psions call it. Your eyes are using everybit of light to see. Undoubtably the torch is interferring with your sight now.”
“Wow….you’re right.” Mania has a stunned look on his face …”I’m a mind bender…” he says not sure if he likes the idea of it.
“You’re no mindbender…not yet anyway,” Dutch motions for them to go down the hallway.
An archway appears on their left about 50-60 feet down from the deadend they just used. Looking down with the torch, a room can be seen. Within it are more clay pots with large humaniods depicted on the walls and a script of some sort below. Peering into the pots, Mania sees skeletal remains of a flat creature that has no arms or legs. Only a large head and ribs. Bored with it, he trys his new vision into more pots finding more of the same.
Going back down the hallway another arch appears. This one leads to a door with two large statues before it. The statues resemble female versions of the large humaniods. “Should I check the door for a way in?,” asks Dogg.
“Since we need to find a way out then yes.” Dutch turns to Mania. “What do make of it?”
“Me?!?” He is obviously surprised to be asked such a question by Dutch. “I don’t know…tomb?” said more as a question than an answer.
“Tomb. Yes I agree but what of what sort?”
“There are different kinds of tombs?”
“Yes. Many in fact. I suspect this is a burial one. The remains in the jars all suggest food for the undead.”
“Undead!?!” yelps Dogg. “We can not fool with any undead Dutch! That would be suicide!”
“ No Dogg. What I meant was…LOOK OUT!” screams Dutch.
The two female statues (Caryatid Columns) come to life and swing stone long swords hidden by their legs and backside. Dirty Dogg drops the torch. It bounces a few times then gives off light at the base of the statues. The deep shadows give a mencing look to the once seductive figures. Cracks form along the base of their bare feet then with sharp cracks of breaking stone, the tomb guardians begin to walk away from the wall.
Mania strikes one very hard. He does no damage but his fingers go numb from the impact. Dutch swings and weaves both short swords at the closest statue. Even with incredibly hard strikes he seems to only chip the stone. Dogg decides to back away before being struck. “Let the glory hounds deal with this” he thinks to himself. For what ever reasons, both animated statues try to hit Dutch only. Each fail.
Mania- seeing an opportunity swings as hard as he can. The blow shatters his wooden weapon. A look of shock and horror crosses his mind and facial features. Dutch swings chipping the golem – like creature then breaks his off hand weapon on it’s leg. Doggs crys out for everyone to leave but they are too caught up in the battle to notice him…or anything else. The statues continue to press Dutch. Mania inadvertily is struck by the backswing drawing blood from his temple and a string of curses only a Black Sand Raider could approve of.
Dutch continues to fight with his one sword finally catching it just right and breaks the stone guardian. Mania looks at the arm of it at his feet. His mind is racing at the possibilities. Dogg now is stomping his feet in frustration. He dosen’t consider himself a coward but this is not a fight for him. Dutch takes a solid hit from the statue as it moves onto him.
Mania reaches down for the staight out reached arm of the broken statue, narrowly avioding being kicked by the still operating one. Dutch does little to the statue. Dogg , desperate now, begins to yell at Dutch about the responcibilities he has to Greene. The column misses again when swinging at Dutch.
Mania swings downward hard breaking off several fingers from his “club”. Dutch misses entirely also. The statue takes more wild swings at Dutch but misses each time. Dogg sputters something about cabin fever before reaching out, cracking his knuckles, seetting forward. “I don’t know which is crazier.….”
Desperate to continue to prove himself, Mania rushes at the sculpture hoping to knock it over. The statue trys to fend him off but misses. Mania does little more than bruise his shoulder and push it against the wall. Dutch does get in a solid shot however as it steps away from the wall. It takes a shot at Dogg as he moves in Dodging it easily.
Mania trys to wrestle the statue but finds it too hard to grasp. Dutch puts several cracks into it’s surface. Dogg kicks it, hoping to trip it up. He will limp now for a few minutes instead. The statue thrashes about fighting in a method seen only in a Raamian bar fight.
Mania trys again and with all of his might trips it up causing it to fall into a prone position. Dutch takes this opportunity to shave off a few more chips with his lone Short Sword. Dogg, knowing how this will end, walks off the sting in his foot smuttering about glory hounds…”….it’s about finesse- not brawn….”
The statue places it’s arm around Mania’s head and drives him HARD into the stone floor effectively freeing it of him.
Mania, bleeding profusely now from multiple cuts on his forehead and seeing a blurred image trys to just latch onto the statue to unsettle it. Dutch swings down breaking his sword as a bigger crack begins to form down it’s chest and middrift. Dogg steps back more turning his head away from the shards of the sword as it bursts. The Statue reaches for Mania trying to free itself of his weight but is shaken a bit by Dutch’s blow.
“You want it rough b---h! I’ll give it to you rough!” Angerily Mania pulls at it grasping the shoulders and wrapping his legs around the female figure’s cracked waist. Dutch takes this moment to pull out his dagger, his last weapon but a magical one. “A knife! A comon’ Dutch! You’ve got to be kidding!” Dogg is both amused and paniced by Dutch and Mania’s desperate never say die attitude. The statue trys to throw off Mania. When it can’t, it simply rises to it’s feet preparing to lunge back into the stone wall.
“uh- oh. Now this…this is going to hurt….”
Mania trys to get free from the impending stone to stone strike but Dutch strikes fast. The knife glows slightly then the statue simply crumples apart half burying Mania in it’s ruins. Dogg stops, dumbfounded…then begins to cry and laugh at the same time.
Ten minutes go by as they strengthen the flame of the torch that nearly went out and Dogg feels safe enough to examine the door. Dutch bandages up Mania’s head giving it a hard tug in the end with a satisfactory “ow” emitting from Mania.
Dutch and Mania push the door aside. Dogg holds the torch before him as if it were a holy symbol ment to scare away evil spirits.
“Whoa…….” Dogg is amazed by the sight within the room.
SEGMENT 022
“Tombs & Traps”
“I can’t see guys!”, Mania hurriedly and harshly says. He does all he can to aviod sneezing but fails. A plumb of fine dust sprays into the air striking to his damp face. “Wait…maybe I can see something.”
Behind him both Dutch and Dity Dogg look at each other as they try figure out how to get the lit torch to Mania.
“You can see…?” Dogg questions.
Dutch waves it away. He is beginning to suspect he must always be prepared for surprises when dealing with this enigmatic young man. “What do you see?”
“No details…just suddenly I went from seeing nothing to seeing the outlines of an archway and a hallway.” Mania pulls himself through the 2ft by 4ft opening set at the base of the floor. “Wow!…I can see even more now that the torch light is shining through.” He dusts himself off then kneels down to take the torch.
“The boy is crazy…he fits well with us,” Dogg comments before sliding under the wall. Dutch, being so much larger of a man just squeezes through. His heavy waist belt snagging on the brick.
Before Dutch can get to his feet he fears Dogg cry out. “Ah! Your eyes Mania…They glow like magic!”
Dutch stands upright as Mania is waving his hand before his eyes then gently to them. “Ah- that burns!”
“Then stop putting dusty fingers in your eyes,” Dutch looks around surveying the space. “It is now clear you have the Will & the Way Mania. I have seen this before. You have Starlight vision or Elf Sight as some psions call it. Your eyes are using everybit of light to see. Undoubtably the torch is interferring with your sight now.”
“Wow….you’re right.” Mania has a stunned look on his face …”I’m a mind bender…” he says not sure if he likes the idea of it.
“You’re no mindbender…not yet anyway,” Dutch motions for them to go down the hallway.
An archway appears on their left about 50-60 feet down from the deadend they just used. Looking down with the torch, a room can be seen. Within it are more clay pots with large humaniods depicted on the walls and a script of some sort below. Peering into the pots, Mania sees skeletal remains of a flat creature that has no arms or legs. Only a large head and ribs. Bored with it, he trys his new vision into more pots finding more of the same.
Going back down the hallway another arch appears. This one leads to a door with two large statues before it. The statues resemble female versions of the large humaniods. “Should I check the door for a way in?,” asks Dogg.
“Since we need to find a way out then yes.” Dutch turns to Mania. “What do make of it?”
“Me?!?” He is obviously surprised to be asked such a question by Dutch. “I don’t know…tomb?” said more as a question than an answer.
“Tomb. Yes I agree but what of what sort?”
“There are different kinds of tombs?”
“Yes. Many in fact. I suspect this is a burial one. The remains in the jars all suggest food for the undead.”
“Undead!?!” yelps Dogg. “We can not fool with any undead Dutch! That would be suicide!”
“ No Dogg. What I meant was…LOOK OUT!” screams Dutch.
The two female statues (Caryatid Columns) come to life and swing stone long swords hidden by their legs and backside. Dirty Dogg drops the torch. It bounces a few times then gives off light at the base of the statues. The deep shadows give a mencing look to the once seductive figures. Cracks form along the base of their bare feet then with sharp cracks of breaking stone, the tomb guardians begin to walk away from the wall.
Mania strikes one very hard. He does no damage but his fingers go numb from the impact. Dutch swings and weaves both short swords at the closest statue. Even with incredibly hard strikes he seems to only chip the stone. Dogg decides to back away before being struck. “Let the glory hounds deal with this” he thinks to himself. For what ever reasons, both animated statues try to hit Dutch only. Each fail.
Mania- seeing an opportunity swings as hard as he can. The blow shatters his wooden weapon. A look of shock and horror crosses his mind and facial features. Dutch swings chipping the golem – like creature then breaks his off hand weapon on it’s leg. Doggs crys out for everyone to leave but they are too caught up in the battle to notice him…or anything else. The statues continue to press Dutch. Mania inadvertily is struck by the backswing drawing blood from his temple and a string of curses only a Black Sand Raider could approve of.
Dutch continues to fight with his one sword finally catching it just right and breaks the stone guardian. Mania looks at the arm of it at his feet. His mind is racing at the possibilities. Dogg now is stomping his feet in frustration. He dosen’t consider himself a coward but this is not a fight for him. Dutch takes a solid hit from the statue as it moves onto him.
Mania reaches down for the staight out reached arm of the broken statue, narrowly avioding being kicked by the still operating one. Dutch does little to the statue. Dogg , desperate now, begins to yell at Dutch about the responcibilities he has to Greene. The column misses again when swinging at Dutch.
Mania swings downward hard breaking off several fingers from his “club”. Dutch misses entirely also. The statue takes more wild swings at Dutch but misses each time. Dogg sputters something about cabin fever before reaching out, cracking his knuckles, seetting forward. “I don’t know which is crazier.….”
Desperate to continue to prove himself, Mania rushes at the sculpture hoping to knock it over. The statue trys to fend him off but misses. Mania does little more than bruise his shoulder and push it against the wall. Dutch does get in a solid shot however as it steps away from the wall. It takes a shot at Dogg as he moves in Dodging it easily.
Mania trys to wrestle the statue but finds it too hard to grasp. Dutch puts several cracks into it’s surface. Dogg kicks it, hoping to trip it up. He will limp now for a few minutes instead. The statue thrashes about fighting in a method seen only in a Raamian bar fight.
Mania trys again and with all of his might trips it up causing it to fall into a prone position. Dutch takes this opportunity to shave off a few more chips with his lone Short Sword. Dogg, knowing how this will end, walks off the sting in his foot smuttering about glory hounds…”….it’s about finesse- not brawn….”
The statue places it’s arm around Mania’s head and drives him HARD into the stone floor effectively freeing it of him.
Mania, bleeding profusely now from multiple cuts on his forehead and seeing a blurred image trys to just latch onto the statue to unsettle it. Dutch swings down breaking his sword as a bigger crack begins to form down it’s chest and middrift. Dogg steps back more turning his head away from the shards of the sword as it bursts. The Statue reaches for Mania trying to free itself of his weight but is shaken a bit by Dutch’s blow.
“You want it rough b---h! I’ll give it to you rough!” Angerily Mania pulls at it grasping the shoulders and wrapping his legs around the female figure’s cracked waist. Dutch takes this moment to pull out his dagger, his last weapon but a magical one. “A knife! A comon’ Dutch! You’ve got to be kidding!” Dogg is both amused and paniced by Dutch and Mania’s desperate never say die attitude. The statue trys to throw off Mania. When it can’t, it simply rises to it’s feet preparing to lunge back into the stone wall.
“uh- oh. Now this…this is going to hurt….”
Mania trys to get free from the impending stone to stone strike but Dutch strikes fast. The knife glows slightly then the statue simply crumples apart half burying Mania in it’s ruins. Dogg stops, dumbfounded…then begins to cry and laugh at the same time.
Ten minutes go by as they strengthen the flame of the torch that nearly went out and Dogg feels safe enough to examine the door. Dutch bandages up Mania’s head giving it a hard tug in the end with a satisfactory “ow” emitting from Mania.
Dutch and Mania push the door aside. Dogg holds the torch before him as if it were a holy symbol ment to scare away evil spirits.
“Whoa…….” Dogg is amazed by the sight within the room.
megamania
Hero
Corwyn said:Exelent story
Nice style.
Look forward to reading more of it.
I would look into how some other writers on the boards cover combat for atleast I found the combat sceans a bit confusing and clutterd.
But that is just a minor point.
Yeah, I know what you mean. What I have been doing is each paragraph is a round. Each sentence within the paragragh covers one character. The order of the sentence is based on order of the initiative.
To break it up a bit I through in quotes or a special effect or descriptive. In the entry above you saw how Mania got the worst end of this.
I hope to work on it more but I'm no RA Salvatore.
megamania
Hero
UNDER A DARKSUN
SEGMENT 023
“Goodies”
The room has script along the base and carved statures on the wall as in the other rooms. However, there is a large stone statue of a humaniod sitting on a throne before them. Six clay vases sit beside the throne. Each glitters with a gold-dust wash.
Dogg looks long and hard before going further. He has decided to be more cautious now after seeing the statues that came to life. After several moments go by, it is decided there are no more traps within or guardians. With this said, Mania begins to open the tall clay pots.
Many things are found inside. Mania refers to them as “Goodies”. The goodies are laid out on the floor. Dutch looks long and hard at them. He knows taking these may allow them to survive but he has never been comfortable with taking from a tomb. Dogg gently touches each item closing his eyes. Some times his eyebrows raise when touching. Mania, feeling naked with no weapon at all simply wants to take the goodies and go.
There is;
A large club that glows when held
Two steel swords of awesome make. One is a shortsword, the other a longsword.
Three small sacks of metal coins (total of 600 GD)
A book with unknown inscriptions on the cover
A sack of jewelery
“well…?” asks Mania in excitement
SEGMENT 023
“Goodies”
The room has script along the base and carved statures on the wall as in the other rooms. However, there is a large stone statue of a humaniod sitting on a throne before them. Six clay vases sit beside the throne. Each glitters with a gold-dust wash.
Dogg looks long and hard before going further. He has decided to be more cautious now after seeing the statues that came to life. After several moments go by, it is decided there are no more traps within or guardians. With this said, Mania begins to open the tall clay pots.
Many things are found inside. Mania refers to them as “Goodies”. The goodies are laid out on the floor. Dutch looks long and hard at them. He knows taking these may allow them to survive but he has never been comfortable with taking from a tomb. Dogg gently touches each item closing his eyes. Some times his eyebrows raise when touching. Mania, feeling naked with no weapon at all simply wants to take the goodies and go.
There is;
A large club that glows when held
Two steel swords of awesome make. One is a shortsword, the other a longsword.
Three small sacks of metal coins (total of 600 GD)
A book with unknown inscriptions on the cover
A sack of jewelery
“well…?” asks Mania in excitement
Megamania, the last combat was indeed better. Although it was on a smaller scale with just a few combatants.
In the other fight with the gith ambush on the templar, it was the greater number of people involved which made it confusing.
In a larger fight I would focus one or two figures and just give a global idea of the rest of the fight.
Take a look at the Small Beginnings story by Enkhidu and Dshai.
The rest is quite brilliant
In the other fight with the gith ambush on the templar, it was the greater number of people involved which made it confusing.
In a larger fight I would focus one or two figures and just give a global idea of the rest of the fight.
Take a look at the Small Beginnings story by Enkhidu and Dshai.
The rest is quite brilliant
megamania
Hero
UNDER A DARKSUN
SEGMENT 024
“More guardians”
The three each look up at the sound they hear. “Company”, Mania says.
All they can see are very large skeletal figures filling up the hallway leading into the room. The battle is fierce and bloody. Dutch and Mania take the most of the damage as Dogg steps in and out strriking from the sides of Mania and Dogg. In the end, 12 large humaniod skeletons are destroyed.
Mania found his glowing Great Club of great use. Dutch has one Short sword to replace his two broken ones. Dogg settles for the Long Sword though he doubts he will ever use it prefering his rapier. Dutch splits the money evenly and places the rest in an empty pouch. He says a few prayers and personal thanks to the undead lord these once belonged to.
Looking about, they find two fooms where the skeletons came from, another storage room that Dogg finds using the same secret door as before. This leaves a long corridoor and another room with two statues similar to those that nearly killed mania before.
Thinking themselves better prepared and knowledgeable, they walk boldly to the statues. One is destoried even as it begins to move. The other gets in one swing before Dutch finishes it off. “Magic can be good.”
Behind this door are more clay pots. Most of the goods are rotted away and useless. They decide to rest here to better recover. The door looks like trouble to Dutch.
SEGMENT 024
“More guardians”
The three each look up at the sound they hear. “Company”, Mania says.
All they can see are very large skeletal figures filling up the hallway leading into the room. The battle is fierce and bloody. Dutch and Mania take the most of the damage as Dogg steps in and out strriking from the sides of Mania and Dogg. In the end, 12 large humaniod skeletons are destroyed.
Mania found his glowing Great Club of great use. Dutch has one Short sword to replace his two broken ones. Dogg settles for the Long Sword though he doubts he will ever use it prefering his rapier. Dutch splits the money evenly and places the rest in an empty pouch. He says a few prayers and personal thanks to the undead lord these once belonged to.
Looking about, they find two fooms where the skeletons came from, another storage room that Dogg finds using the same secret door as before. This leaves a long corridoor and another room with two statues similar to those that nearly killed mania before.
Thinking themselves better prepared and knowledgeable, they walk boldly to the statues. One is destoried even as it begins to move. The other gets in one swing before Dutch finishes it off. “Magic can be good.”
Behind this door are more clay pots. Most of the goods are rotted away and useless. They decide to rest here to better recover. The door looks like trouble to Dutch.
megamania
Hero
Corwyn said:Megamania, the last combat was indeed better. Although it was on a smaller scale with just a few combatants.
In the other fight with the gith ambush on the templar, it was the greater number of people involved which made it confusing.
In a larger fight I would focus one or two figures and just give a global idea of the rest of the fight.
Take a look at the Small Beginnings story by Enkhidu and Dshai.
The rest is quite brilliant
I am hoping to do that once I have a few levels built up. The current main character, Mania, has plenty of potencial as a fighter/psy warrior with a sense of drama. Being so early in the story, I want people to remember the characters and what they can and can't do.
For example, Dogg rolls really poorly as of late. Dutch has scored about 6 critical hits since Segment 22 but it has been all undead and constructs- thus useless. Mania comes and goes.
'course this may mean nothing in the end. Between HPs being retracted and the damage Dutch and Mania just took, it looks grim for them indeed.
Thankyou for the support and useful thoughts.
