[Updated 7/5] Latest update on my FR game: as ever, opinions wanted

Qualir said:
Have you thought about throwing in a final twist to the plot? What would happen if the players learn that the poor puppet king that they just destroyed actually was a true heir to the throne? After all, the best lie is built on some amount of truth. This would explain why PC and NPC divinition magic failed to uncover the imposter.

Now, the PCs are faced with the knowledge that an innocent soul is facing eternity in damnation for his part in the ruse. The regent feels some amount of responsibility and asks for PC help. The party is now all set to start an epic campaign fighting through the planes for the salvation of a soul they inadvertantly helped to damn.

Just an idea.

Sounds good and let the High CR Demon/Devil reveal it to them after he leaves the body when they've killed the innocent. Nothing is worse than finding out that you've actually helped evil along. :]

Reminds me of an adventure where my group was hired to go deal with a Vrock demon that was terrorizing a countryside. He had a magial sword in his possession that our contact said needed to be destroyed but only he had the ability (he was a high level wizard). Well, we went and did our good deed and gave the sword to the Wizard. The Wizard just laughed at us and thanked us for destroying his rival and giving them a most potent weapon. It was at that time that he polymorphed back to his original form of a Glabrezou demon and then gated away. You should have heard the cries of anguish! :cool:
 

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Ya know, I got so set on the idea of Alec being fake I never even thought what would happen if he really WAS real, ya know? There's so much irony in that setup -- the Twisted Rune didn't notice, "Vanderghast" didn't notice 'cause he was too busy casting stuff on him to make him look real, and no one else woulda noticed cause of the aforementioned spells. That's really cool...
 

By the way... I decided I was gonna set the whole campaign into motion with a little handout I just spent the last few hours writing... I'm using the "death" of Azoun as "before we got started" plot device, and am gonna let the PCs find out about it through a prophetic dream (I'm really fond of this plot device for some reason)... here's what I wrote (I used to be a pretty good writer, guess we'll find out if I've still got it or not):

The first rays of the morning sun wash over the landscape, bathing the city of Suzail -- capital of Cormyr -- in their light. At the center of the capital, the royal palace can be seen, its design and structure the definition of the word “majestic.” Already many of the citizens are gathered at the palace walls, waiting to hear Princess Alusair Nacacia Obarskyr, Regent of the nation, address the populace.
As she steps to the edge of the balcony, the sunlight reflects off her magnificent golden armor, enhancing her considerable presence. At her side, as ever, stands the beautiful battle-wizard Caladnei – her most trusted ally and friend. Raising her right hand to hush the populace, Alusair opens her mouth to speak…

Somewhere else – somewhere deep underground, far from the morning light – a beaten and haggard you man awakens to a familiar sound: that out a key turning in a lock, followed by a loud creak as the heavy metal door to his cell swings open…

Alusair continues to address the populace, assuring them that she is doing all she can to quell the unrest Cormyr has suffered in recent years. She begins to call for volunteers to supplant the forces that have been amassed for her latest campaign, when Caladnei cuts her off.
“My lady!” Caladnei cries out. “Your nephew!”
Before the battle-wizard can say anything more, the Regent is gone, running back into the palace and towards the chambers of her nephew: the infant Azoun V, heir to the throne of Cormyr…

The sudden light streaming into his cell hurts the young man’s eyes, and he is forced to cover them with his hands. Even without his eyes, however, he knows the sounds he hears all to well. The harsh breathing, the heavy footsteps, the metal chain dragging across the stone floor – the troll is here to torture him again…

Alusair rounds the corner, entering into Azoun’s chambers, several of the palace guards hot at her heels. What she sees when she enters is like something from one of her worst nightmares: the infant king’s personal guard lay scattered about the chamber, all dead. And as for the boy himself, he is in the clutches of nearly a dozen ebony-skinned elves – drow!
Before the Regent can find her tongue again, the dark elves have sprung into action. Several of them flank the one holding Azoun – a woman, and their leader, from the looks of it – as she moves towards the windows. The others draw their weapons – scimitars and crossbows – and move to intercept Alusair and her entourage…

The chain strikes the young man again, this time square in the chest. He falls to the ground, gasping for breath, only to be hit by a fierce uppercut from the troll’s powerful fist. He sails backwards, the chain catching him in the temple as he slams into the ground…

The battle is quick and chaotic. The palace guards are no match for the vile and honorless dark elves, and are quickly dispatched. Princess Alusair, however, refuses to fall. Already several crossbow bolts protrude from her torso and shoulders, but the drow poison they carry refuses to take hold. The dark elves have tightened their formation, seeking to prevent the Regent from reaching their leader before she can escape…
The female dark elf, Azoun balanced in her arms, waves her hands through a brief spellcasting, then steps out of the window. Those of her number who had been flanking her quickly do the same. Seeing this, Alusair screams out in rage and redoubles her efforts to break through the ranks of the dark elves who seek to impede her progress. For her trouble, she receives three more crossbow bolts, and this time the sleep poison takes effect…

The young man’s left eye is now swollen shut, and the vision in his right is blurred by the blood that runs freely from his forehead. His arm hangs useless at his side, and his breathing is labored and painful. He knows a few ribs are cracked, if not outright broken. He wonders how much more of this punishment he can take…

The female holding onto Azoun in the lead, all twelve of the dark elves slowly float down the palace walls, towards the soft ground below. From the back of their hasty formation, one of the warriors that faced Alusair cries out to a warning in the drow tongue to his commander. She glances upwards, and sees that on the roof of the palace, Caladnei is pointing directly at them! The battle-wizard’s hands go through the motions of a spellcasting, and a bolt of lightning arcs out from her hands, striking the dark elf closest to her. The bolt then moves towards the next in the formation, then the next, working its way towards the dark elves’ leader…
The female dark elf, reacting as quickly as possible to the situation, begins waving her hands through the motions of a counterspell. Unfortunately, this causes her to release her grip on her captive, and the infant Azoun (now free of her levitation spell) plunges towards the ground below…
While the female counters the lightning, another of the dark elves recovers enough to loose his own counterattack upon Caladnei. Reaching towards his neck, he tears loose a string of many-sized pearls, hurling two of the smaller ones towards the battle-wizard…

Over and over the troll’s fist connects with the young man’s midsection. Stars now dance over his vision, his one good eye threatening to give out. Maybe trying to take the chain from him wasn’t the best idea, he thinks. He’ll have to remember that… if he survives…

Caladnei barely manages to dive out of the way as the twin pearls strike her former position, erupting into huge blasts of magical fire. Coughing to clear the smoke and ash out of her lungs, she struggles to regain her lost footing, as the palace roof begins to collapse…
The dark elves all see the chunks of debris falling towards them, but they have almost no time to react. Several of the quicker-witted ones reverse their descent, instead floating upwards and arcing away from the first wave of debris, but still running smack dab into the second wave. A large rock strikes the male holding the string of magical pearls, which fall from his hands to the ground below…
Although they all try valiantly, in the end none of the dark elves are able to escape the rain of stone debris that has fallen upon them. As each of them is struck, their spells of levitation fail, and they plunge towards the ground below. Thinking quickly, the female begins the incantation to create a doorway in the ground below to catch both herself and the infant Azoun.
The doorway indeed materializes -- but unfortunately, it does so mere seconds before the string of pearls strikes the ground, trigging a massive explosion the likes of which much of Cormyr have never seen!

As the troll’s fist connects with his cheek one final time and consciousness finally fails him, the young man slumps to the ground, glad that his torture is finally – for today, at least – over. As the final vestiges of coherence fails him, he catches a glimpse of a shape outlined in the light behind the troll – and what appears to be a dozen eye-stalks staring intently at him…

As the young man fades into darkness, you catch a brief glimpse of the devastation that has befallen Suzail: charred bodies litter the streets, the palace’s foundation has been damaged, Alusair and Caladnei are both injured… and then, as suddenly as it began, the vision-dream ends.
You don’t yet wake up, however. Instead, you find yourself somewhere else…

The chamber is large and well-lit, thanks to a wagon wheel chandelier that overlooks a central hearth. Spread across the room are six long tables, and at the head sits a performance stool. You recognize this place as the Everful Chalice Tavern, a place you and your companions have frequented from time to time. When you were last there, it was busy, loud, and full of people. Now it is almost entirely empty, with only one individual sitting on the stool. They are wearing heavy grey robes, and a hood covers their head. You cannot make out any features that would help you identify them –
“I need to speak with you.” The stranger’s voice, unmistakably male, snaps you out of your reverie. “Please, meet me here at first light two days from now. The nation of Cormyr needs your help – in fact, its very future may depend on you.”
 
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Plots within plots within plots. I find it helps to keep my players guessing all the to the end of a campiagn and often beyond. It keeps them asking when I am going to run again.
 


SurfMonkey01 you should clean that text up a bit, and only a lil bit, and send it to WOTC. That story reads better than many of their novels, and was much more interesting too.
 


Qualir said:
SurfMonkey01 you should clean that text up a bit, and only a lil bit, and send it to WOTC. That story reads better than many of their novels, and was much more interesting too.

Whatcha think needs cleaned up? Just curious...
 

SurfMonkey01 said:
Whatcha think needs cleaned up? Just curious...

Just a few type Os, nothing serious. The only thing I might actually change is adding a transitional statement between the prophetic dream and the cut scene to the tavern.

Still, I would have no problem laying down cash on a novel that started out this way. It reminds me of the opening scenes in the Torment PC RPG. Interesting, shocking, and wanting to know more are thoughts that come to mind.
 

Qualir said:
Just a few type Os, nothing serious. The only thing I might actually change is adding a transitional statement between the prophetic dream and the cut scene to the tavern.

Still, I would have no problem laying down cash on a novel that started out this way. It reminds me of the opening scenes in the Torment PC RPG. Interesting, shocking, and wanting to know more are thoughts that come to mind.

Actually, the tavern is part of the dream, too. I was having problems with transitioning to it without transitioning out of the dream, so I thought I'd try the font change. Maybe I'll make an adjustment to it, though... I think I just had an idea... check back in a few, it might be updated...

By the way, thanks very much for the compliment. Maybe I should start writing more again...

*** edited -- I added a transition -- try it now ***
 
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