[Vile? Mature] Going Too Far.

[RSKennan]

Let me second the above posts, I was replying in kind with them anyway. Hong's post especially. You did a great job at what you set out to do, apparently, and I would have loved to be part of such a trancendent game.

About the age comment; That has always seemed to be a cop out for when older people are confronted with things they don't want to deal with. It's an easy way to justify brushing off the younger person's ideas. That said, I think you now know where this particular player's comfort zone is, and how to avoid impinging on it. Just don't stop trying to push the boundaries, even if it means that you need a different or additional group.

As someone who's dealt with the loss of an unborn child, I don't think you've done anything wrong. Granted, I'm a man, but that event actually hit me pretty hard.

 

[Xarlen]

From what you have said it sounds like you did a bang up job of some good role playing. Sounds to me like the other player has a problem that she needs to deal with. She is the one who is behaving rather childishly. If something happened in real life and she cannot distinguish it from the game then it sounds like she needs to either take a break from gaming or seek some help.

I would Not call the person acting childishly. She was not angry, and she was not snippy. She kept on RPing, and did a DAMN good job of craddling the Druid, and talking about the lost children, and honoring their spirits, and offering to name them, a whole lot of things. She didn't stop, but I could tell (espiecally after her LJ entry) it bugged her. Maybe not too deeply, but atleast at the time.

Rest assured that, after the fight, when the emotions started hitting the fan, and the Druid started telling what happened, I was crying. Because I was saying to my self, and I felt for her too, and I can understand coming from the player's point, this could have been harder.

Luckily, the game will go on hiatus after this story ends (Which it's about to). The next campaign (with new players), I am going to ask them up front what they do not want me touching on.

 

[Xarlen]

I will also say, that if anyone is interested in seeing what happened, the log for last session (The fight and the aftermath) will be posted on the web.

 

[RSKennan]

When do you play? I might want in, if it's ok....

 

[kenjib]

It's hard to say without having been there. The specifics are pretty important, I think.

 

[Xarlen]

When do you play? I might want in, if it's ok....

Well, actually, the game's a little full... The next campaign I'm running allready has 4 PCs lined up.

I play on a MUCK with a logging script and dice-roller programs. Just a place where friends meet up, and we set up games from there.

 

[RSKennan]

No problem, but feel free to email me if you need a substitute, or if you start a new campaign. My writing schedule is pretty full anyway, but I would make time for a really intense game.

 

[LostSoul]

I don't think you did anything wrong. You introduced a plot element that you thought would draw the players into the story. It worked too well. But you couldn't have predicted that. Some people are sensitive in areas that they don't want to touch, so I wouldn't do it again; but you didn't do anything wrong in the first place.

 

[Hadit]

There have been some pretty good responses to your query already, but I have a couple of things to add.
It seems your major concern was the accusation by your players that you sometimes act "too young". Well, you ARE about 10 years younger than your players apparently, so that is going to be a facet of that campaign that is never going to change... your players should be aware of that and act accordingly. In most gaming situations this is not going to be a factor, but (as has been already pointed out), if you choose to bring elements of a more complex and mature storyline into your game, you must take into consideration your own actual life experiences in order to make such "mature" situations seem believable. My guess is that you have never directly experienced the miscarriage of a child... your child (pardon me deeply if I am wrong). It is possible that your player has, and while she may not feel traumatised by the event, she may feel that you handled the situation in a clunky way due to your inexperience... and felt somehow offended in an offhand way. No one is really wrong here... you were simply trying to invest your game with a little more "real-life" grit. Unfortunately, some of your players may be more experienced with these real-life situations, and have taken you (mildly) to task on it. Likewise, though, I think your players can be taken to task for not being a little more understanding of your own position... after all, you are simply trying to give your game more emotional whallop, and that is commendable of any DM!
Personal opinion: I do not find it all too believable that an elven druidess would "go crazy" because she had a miscarriage... POSSIBLE, yes... but pretty improbable overall. Druid's honor nature. Nature is nothing if not the eternal dance of life and death. Druid's recognize this and are not particularly queasy with the contemplation of mortality. Of course she would be saddened... but that is a long way from crazy.

 

[Kichwas]

Number one rule of dealing with -vile- content, especially anything that hits on sexual or reproductive issues; is that you -have- to clear it beforehand. You need to come up with some way of getting approval on certain topics without giving away your plots.

Some people do not appreciate certain topics in their entertainment. For others, it can hit too close to home. You need to approach it with sensitivity.