I love that something that matters to a player (and presumable a friend, at least an acquaintance of some time) dome how is less important to you then other players (and presumable a friend, at least an acquaintance of some time) fun... how do I decide between Ross and Kurt when both I have know for almost twenty years?? I mean really, if a player says "Hey, stop the game something here is bugging me and making me have less fun" why NOT address it?
To start with an aside: it is interesting that one player disrupting me, and Ross, and Kurt, and John, and Linda, all at the same time, is ignored in your point.
But beyond that you have to keep this question within the context of the conversation.
You may very well have missed my earlier point that a DM's first obligation is to run a game that people WANT to be part of.
So that is important to keep in kind when you start throwing around implications about being a jerk to friends.
If there is a disconnect, then it will be addressed. But the addressing is going to be "asked and answered" not a debate, derail of game, or otherwise creation of turmoil, as this thread has identified.
Certainly in the case of Manticores don't live in the forest, an answer of "they do in this game" should suffice to any friend who lives up to that label.
My current group of 15 years has not yet reached your 20 year benchmark, but I think it is close enough. And we have a lot of fun and there is a distinct LACK of turmoil at the table.
We most certainly have the routine misunderstandings or disconnect on presumptions. But we understand that having a single point of cutting off that dispute in a manner that facilitates persistent fun for all is vastly better than constant derailing. And it is worth noting that there is a strong overlap between the people who complain about the problems caused by these disruptions and the people who agree with the pandering method of addressing it.
There have been plenty of conversations away from game about thoughts or requests. I generally am eager to accommodate. Honestly, I find having curve balls like that in the game to be a fun part of the entire experience. But I've also simply told people that "this idea won't work in this game". And I've had some disappointment on rare occasion. But the primary goal of making people WANT to be in my game is still recognized and I've never come close to losing a player over something like this. I make no claims of a utopian cure-all. But my method works. I'd advise anyone trying to make this problem go away to keep that in mind. But they are, of course, free to do whatever they want.
