Zardnaar
Legend
The adversarial DMS found support in Gygax's writing and people had problems denying them as no "I am not being a jerk I am challenging the player.... " look at that horrible Monty Haul DM" lets all laugh at the guy who lets people get away with stuff ... you are supposed to be making sure they EARNED those stripes. Those low hit point low levels ensured the best option for success was basically cowardice and not being heroic at all.This was arguably the first balanced class design in the history of D&D so when we try to narrow down why people didnt like class design the answers are often hard to figure out the pattern Tony is focusing on.
I'm not denyiong any experiences you had with say AD&D but going by what is published its not fantasy Vietnam by any means.
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I've never run OSR games like that shrugs.
I think the main problem you are experiencing is you don't comprehend most players don't actually care about balance at least in the way you do. They do care if the extremes get bad or if it makes the DMs life hell (3E).
4E balance is pointless if no one wants to play it or it creates new problems like to much healing leading to grinding combats and combats that take to long. You solve some problems and create new ones. You could cut 4E healing by 75% and cut the expected encounters down to say 2/day.
The other balanced D&D would be B/X, wasn't great at level 1 and you could smooth that out in a clone. B/X lacked a lot of the problem spells of AD&D though.