What is the lowest level smackdown?

[Jeremy]

Hmmmm.... Drop something really really really heavy on someone? Like Mara's tactical nuclear ballistic iron golem strike?

Too many spells there. Hmm.. Maybe something really big? Like a whole building? But made out of something really dense, and really heavy. Like instead of stone, adamantine or something... Yeah! A whole building built of adamantine..... But not some little house or something.. I want like a 30 ft tall, 3 story TOWER of adamantine to drop on someone...

But how do you get one of those that you can carry around with you without being in a cartoon?

Yeah, yeah, you get where this is going. There just happens to be a 30 ft tall, pure adamantine tower in the DMG that shrinks down to pocket size to carry around with you and only takes (you guessed it) one round to form.

So let's see... We have to approximate the weight of the thing.. The nearest thing I can think of to something 30 ft tall and heavy and dense as a 30' adamantine tower is a 32' tall huge earth elemental. They weigh 48,000 lbs according to MM pg 83. Now this is a 10x5 creature of stone, not a 20x20 tower of adamantine, that's only an 8th the size.. So if we know it's the size of about 8 huge earth elementals then 8 x 48k = 384k. But this things got a lot of air inside it too (walls, supports, furniture, and everything else not withstanding) so let's keep the math simple and round it down to 300,000 lbs.

Now then, if we drop this thing from atop a 50 ft cliff, that should give it precisely enough time to grow before it lands while still occurring in the one round time frame required for a smackdown... According to DMG pg 89 a three-hundred thousand pound object that falls 10 ft does 1500d6 damage.. Plus a little more for falling 50 ft. instead of 10 ft (not much more, it's the weight here that makes the difference, not the speed so much, though both weigh heavily...ack, sorry.. )... Times average damage of a d6, comes out to around... 5264 damage. That just manages to beat the smackdown 200 damage minimum. 20 ft diameter impact, reflex for half if you are feeling mean, reflex negates if your PC's enjoy a little adrenaline fix from russian roulette.

Of course, a Daern's Instant Fortress will cost the first level PC who's dropping it around 55,000 gp, so there might be a few financial problems, but who's counting?

 

[Roland Delacroix]

Second level Bard with 18 Charisma. Maxed Diplomacy, Sense Motive, Bluff, and take every language you expect to encounter. Take Skill Focus: Diplomacy and Duelist (or any feat that gives +2 Diplomacy +x). Your Diplomacy bonus with all stuff is +17. On an average roll of 10 you get a 27. According to DMG table 5-4, Influencing NPC Attitude, this will turn even a Hostile creature Indifferent (many monsters). It will turn an Unfriendly creature Friendly, an Indifferent creature (most NPC's) Friendly, and a Friendly creature Helpfull.

If you can talk to it and it is intelligent, you can charm it. Many DM's will require some 'Roleplaying' to allow this, but really the Diplomacy roll is it. Anything on top of that is a 'Live Action' game. Aside from turning hostile creatures Indifferent, you should drop by the jailhouse and make friends of all the guards. You can probably convince a few to join you (Indifferent to Helpfull) and kill any non-intelligent stuff you come across. Sure Warriors arent great, but at 2nd level they're about as good as fighters.

Thats your 2nd level Smackdown. To continue along this vein i'd take at 3rd level Monte Cooks ranger and drop all my points into Animal Empathy and Diplomacy rank 6. For my 3rd level feat i'd take Cosmopolitan: Diplomacy for an average Diplomacy roll of 30. You will make everything less than Hostile Friendly, most likely Helpfull. Keep taking Animal Empathy, Diplomacy, and languages. At 6th level take Leadership and a Cohort of anything that will buy you time to talk your way out of an ambush.

By 6th level you should be able to sweet tounge your way out of any threat by intelligent being, and most of those by animals, beasts, and some magical beasts. Animal Empathy DCs are generally lower because there are more Indifferent animals that Hostile intelligents.

BTW for this to work your DMs should be giving XP for defeating threats, not just killing stuff.

 

[Plane Sailing]

Using just the PHB?

1st level half orc barbarian, 20 Str, using two +5 flaming burst military picks, with power attack and raging who scores maximum damage critical with both picks?

pick 1 = 4x(1d6+7(str)+1 (power attack)+5 enhancement) +3d10
= (4x19) + 30 = 106

pick 2 = 4x(1d6+3+1+5) +3d10
= (4x15)+30 = 90

Thus total = 196 damage.

Don't ask me where he got the +5 flaming burst picks from!

If he had a bulls strength cast on him that gave him an additional +5 Str, then you can add another +8 to the first attack and +4 to the second (after multiplication) to give a final total of 208 damage.

He would need to roll 2 20's for each of the picks, and then maximum on his damage rolls... but its a possibility!

Cheers

 

[RogueJK]

One must limit his/her character to the appropriate wealth by level according to the DMG.

Hmm...

1st level half orc barbarian, 20 Str, using two +5 flaming burst military picks

Hmmmm...



I don't think that he could afford two +5 Flaming Burst picks with his 4d4x10 starting gold.

 

[Mustrum_Ridcully]

I don't think that he could afford two +5 Flaming Burst picks with his 4d4x10 starting gold.

Hmm, perhaps if he presents the purchase of the +5 Flaming Burst weapons as a good "new market" idea, the bank might give him the money for it. But than, he probably should be able to speak and write, so a bard will make this better

 

[Plane Sailing]

Laughs!

OK, I read Gaidens first post in detail, but not the one lower down about restricting it to equipement available at that level!

So my limited first level example is a raging half-orc barbarian with 20 Str (24 in the rage), using power attack with his two (ordinary) picks.

= 4x(1d6+7+1) + 4(1d6+3+1)

=56 + 40

= 96 damage


My alternative is a 1st level human rogue with 18 Str, a mighty composite bow, point blank shot and rapid fire who gains initiative... all his shots critical and do max damage

surprise round - two shots, doing 3x(1-8+4 Str +1 PBS) +1d6

= 2 x (3x13) +6
= 2 x 45
= 90.

If he is very lucky he might do the same again on the next round while they are still flatfooted

Cheers

 

[Plane Sailing]

(whoops! Quoted when I meant to edit, sorry!)


Laughs!

OK, I read Gaidens first post in detail, but not the one lower down about restricting it to equipement available at that level!

So my limited first level example is a raging half-orc barbarian with 20 Str (24 in the rage), using power attack with his two (ordinary) picks. A friend casts Magic Weapon on his picks

= 4x(1d6+7+1+1) + 4(1d6+3+1+1)

=60 + 44

= 100 damage

Slightly higher probability is that same raging half-orc barbarian with a Scythe that has magic weapon cast on it. He criticals while doing a power attack and rolls max damage:
= 4x(2d4+10+1+1)

=4x20

=80 damage


My alternative is a 1st level human rogue with 18 Str, a mighty composite bow, point blank shot and rapid fire who gains initiative... all his shots critical and do max damage

surprise round - two shots, doing 3x(1-8+4 Str +1 PBS) +1d6

= 2 x (3x13) +6
= 2 x 45
= 90.

If he is very lucky he might do the same again on the next round while they are still flatfooted

Cheers

 

[Gaiden]

Roland, I must say that is the most original smackdown I have ever seen, not to mention the absolute most incredible one. That would be more fun by far than any other smackdown I have ever read.

Props

 

[Shirt Guy John]

LOL

These are all hilarious, but I could still beat you with a 1st level commoner armed only with a pointed stick.

Assuming the commoner level was the only class level taken by a deity-level creature, that is.

Poke.

 

[Gaiden]

Here is a shot for my lowest level smackdown.

Human - crane
str-19+3(bull's str)
dex-18+3(cat's grace)
chr-19+3(eagle's splendor)

Samurai2, Fighter2, Rogue2, cleric 1, Ranger1, sorcerer1,

feats - exotic weapon: crescent knife, quickdraw, power attack - iaijutsu focus, weapon focus: crescent knife, combat reflexes, expert tactician, power attack, divine might, improved initiative

skills - iaijutsu focus 24, spellcraft 16, UMD 5, Hide 18

Spells - mage armor,shield

domains - time, charm

equipment - katanna w/focus enchantment (+4 to iaijutsu focus)-975gp, 3 scrolls of greater magic weapon 15th level-3375gp, scroll of bull's strength 3rd level-150gp, scroll of eagle's splendor 3rd level-150gp, cat's grace 3rd level-150gp, scroll of haste 5th level-375gp, scroll of dimensional door 7th level-700gp, scroll of superior invisibility 7th level-700gp, 6 potions of true strike-300gp, ready drink helm-150gp. 2 scrolls of quickened true strike 2250 gp

Tactic: spot your enemy while hiding from around 680' away (meaning the defender has at least a +68 to the DC to listen to you casting your spells and a -68 to their spot check). Cast eagle's splendor, bull's strenght, cat's grace, mage armor, greater magic weapon on each of your 3 crescent knives in no particular order. Then cast haste (and shield with the partial action). Next round cast superior invisibility and divine favor. Next round use charm domain power and divine might. Finally cast bless and then dimensional door with the free partial action from haste. Dimensional door behind your enemy 5' away. When you appear you will catch your opponent by surprise (yes, even if it is a great wyrm (blindsight is only 360') - that is, assuming it could not predict the future, wasn't scrying on you, etc.). You will take a 5' step forward right diagonal (free action) and your familiar will take a 5' step forward left diagonal (free action). Now that you are flanking your opponent you attack with the partial action from the surprise round, attack with the partial action from haste, and attack with the partial action from expert tactician. Each of the three attacks is at +24 (+6bab,+5gmw,+6str,+2invis.,+1wf:ck,+2flanking,+1 bless,+1divine might) Of course you waited until your opponent wasn't wearing his armor or his magical protections right? So you power attack for +6. That means each attack is at +18-still hitting just about anything assuming average rolling. Assuming maybe bracers of armor or some other AC bonus that is not a dodge or dex bonus (don't forget about them being flatfooted), you will still most likely hit with every attack. Now, you are using crescent knives which give two attacks in place of every single attack you make. That means that in fact you are rolling and resolving 6 attacks for your 3. So each of the six attacks deals 1d3+5(gmw)+6(str)+6(PA)+1d6(SA)+8(divine might)+7d6(avg roll with iaijutsu). On average you have just dealt 330 dmg. But wait, that is just the surprise round. Let's say you win initiative. Next round you will get 5 attacks (don't forget you can fight with two weapons from the ranger class). So you drop your current crescent knife (free action) and quick draw the other two (free actions). Let's say you PA again for +6. And let's again assume that all of your attacks at the highest BAB (+16 now) hit and your other attack hits and your +11 attack hits maybe 50% of the time assuming opponent AC 32!!! with average rolls, which is more than likely considering you have waited until they don't have any defenses up and they are still flatfooted so no dex or dodge bonuses. That is an additional 522.5 damage giving a grand total of 852.5 damage.

But wait you might not be satisfied. I know most creatures in D&D would have just died but what if the opponent does have a really good AC, what if he has natural armor equivalent to hag's or a dragon's, an amulet of natural armor +5, or has bracers of defense +8 or something ridiculous like that (compared to your equipment that is worth less than 10000 gp total). Hey, what the hell, let's go nuts. Let's say its a great wyrm red dragon with an AC of 41 and 660 hit points. How would my 9th level fare against such a foe. Well he would probably die just for thinking that he could challenge him. But let's say that the circumstances were right and he could dimensional door next to the dragon and catch it by surprise. During the surprise round, he would drink one potion of true strike from his ready-drink helm (free action) and attack with expert tactician at +38 PA for 4 (no flanking because his familiar is now on his shoulder). Thus he would deal 2x(6+5+4+2+8+28 (for IF and SA)) = 106. His familiar who beat his initiative would first have thrown a tanglefoot bag at the dragon to entangle it to effectively reduce its AC by 2 hence the +38 with 100% hit rate rather than +40. (I know ridiculous but legit according to the rules-this is a smackdown people). Then the familiar would have thrown an acid flask at the dragon dealing 3.5 points of damage. With the PC's partial action from the surprise round he would drink another potion of true strike from the helm (free action) and attack dealing another 106 damage. With his haste action he would cast a quickened true strike and attack again for another 106 points of damage. Again assuming he wins initiative, he would take the full attack action to attack with two weapons and get the iteraive attack in. His familiar move's the helm as a move equivalent action then ready's to move the helm again, after its master has made two attacks, meanwhile throwing another acid flask at the dragon dealing another 3.5 damage. Therefore the two main attacks from the freshly drawn crescent knives from quickdraw would be at +38 (from two sips from the helm) doing 212 damage. THe familiar then goes and moves the helm again. Then the iteraive attack and the attack from expert tactician are used again with the true strike potions one is at +33 to hit doing .80 of the normal damage and the other doing 100% of the normal damage meaning a total of 190.8 damage. Finally, the haste action is used by casting the second quickened true strike scroll as a free action and then attacking at +38 doing another 106 damage. Then the dragon gets to go. But wait you and the familiar just dealt 833.8 damage to that dragon. Damn, that is one dead dragon. You overkilled it by 177.8 damage, oh and I forgot, each attack dealt over 50 damage so that dragon is making a saving throw vs. death for every one of the total 16 attack rolls you made.

I think I will say it - GOOD NIGHT.

edit: I forgot to add the extra point of damage from divine might to everything. I would imagine that would add around 17 extra points of damage or so (15 from the attacks, and 2 from the familiar).