Vraille Darkfang
First Post
There are times when being the DM sucks.
Your best laid plans are not only DEFEATED by the players, but so absolutly trashed that having them attemtp to kill sleeping infants would have posed a greater challenge.
They get evertyhing, Treasure, XP, Fame, Glory, at no real cost to themselves.
You. You look like an idiot.
Then one of the players does something so incredibly stupid your faith is instantly restored.
For example,
Party heads into the lair of a Great Red Dragon (despite you attempts to warn them it was a hook for down the road, say 9-10 levels). They manage to bumble their way to the main lair, almost killing themselves in the process.
Finally, at single digit hit points and nearly out of spells, they are ambushed by the Ancient Red Dragon.
Halfling Wizard wins Initiative. Casts Dominate Monster. Rolls Nat 20 to overcome SR. I roll a 1 for Will save. Halfling has new puppy.
Commands it to help carry treasure, show them way out, tell them what everything does. I'm feeling really special right now. The meanes critter in the D&D world & the halfling has it playing fetch.
Then, he gets greedy. Mere commands are not enough. He must SHOW-OFF his power over the dragon. Has him urinate, defectate, roll over, play dead. The player's clearly enjoying my frustration. Then the ALL HOLY SPIRIT OF GYGAX enters the room and all is about to be made right.
Halfing smiles & declares. "All right dragon, lets see you FORNICATE!". Did the player know what fornicate REALLY meant? Maybe, maybe not. He sure knows now. After all, he didn't specify WHAT to fornicate with, and as the person giving the command.....
The look on his face as I describe the tons of Dragon flesh leaping in the air towards him, his small body the center of an ever exapanding shadow of darkness.
"Squish, Hump. Squish, Hump, Squish Hump"
Death by Dragon Humping. Then, with the spellcaster dead, the dragon regains his true self. Remembers the whole 'Dance! Dance, Dragon, Dance!' bit, and proceeds to make BBQ out of the rest of the party.
And, lo, it was good to be the DM once more.
Your best laid plans are not only DEFEATED by the players, but so absolutly trashed that having them attemtp to kill sleeping infants would have posed a greater challenge.
They get evertyhing, Treasure, XP, Fame, Glory, at no real cost to themselves.
You. You look like an idiot.
Then one of the players does something so incredibly stupid your faith is instantly restored.
For example,
Party heads into the lair of a Great Red Dragon (despite you attempts to warn them it was a hook for down the road, say 9-10 levels). They manage to bumble their way to the main lair, almost killing themselves in the process.
Finally, at single digit hit points and nearly out of spells, they are ambushed by the Ancient Red Dragon.
Halfling Wizard wins Initiative. Casts Dominate Monster. Rolls Nat 20 to overcome SR. I roll a 1 for Will save. Halfling has new puppy.
Commands it to help carry treasure, show them way out, tell them what everything does. I'm feeling really special right now. The meanes critter in the D&D world & the halfling has it playing fetch.
Then, he gets greedy. Mere commands are not enough. He must SHOW-OFF his power over the dragon. Has him urinate, defectate, roll over, play dead. The player's clearly enjoying my frustration. Then the ALL HOLY SPIRIT OF GYGAX enters the room and all is about to be made right.
Halfing smiles & declares. "All right dragon, lets see you FORNICATE!". Did the player know what fornicate REALLY meant? Maybe, maybe not. He sure knows now. After all, he didn't specify WHAT to fornicate with, and as the person giving the command.....
The look on his face as I describe the tons of Dragon flesh leaping in the air towards him, his small body the center of an ever exapanding shadow of darkness.
"Squish, Hump. Squish, Hump, Squish Hump"
Death by Dragon Humping. Then, with the spellcaster dead, the dragon regains his true self. Remembers the whole 'Dance! Dance, Dragon, Dance!' bit, and proceeds to make BBQ out of the rest of the party.
And, lo, it was good to be the DM once more.


