Why Bodybuilding is bad

[questing gm]

The hot chainmail-clad elf gamer chicks love muscle-toned GMs.

I can see the new advertising images for 4th ed...

 

[Hussar]

Thought this fit:

 

[EyeontheMountain]

amusing

 

[Kae'Yoss]

Was this thread spawned from personal experience?

Well.... sort of. You know? My cousin, no, a friend of mine, yes, he played in that game where something like this happened. Apparently. It gives you the worst nightmares, the ones where you wake up in the middle of the night, screaming, crying, wanting your mommy and having to go back to sleep with the lights on - or so he told me!

 

[Piratecat]

Have we met? How did you know I do that?

*blink* you too?

I've structured two campaigns around that premise. Hell, you've just laid out the plot of the one-shots that I'm running at GenCon.

 

[paradox42]

A gym nearby recently changed its name to "Plane Fitness" which got my wife and I thinking about "Planar Fitness" and how you could market a gym to DnD players.

You could have work out gear that simulated wearing light, medium, or heavy armor, obstacle courses, martial arts and weapons classes, classes on health gaming snacks, Cardio-Larping, and of course to keep people motivated we would have trainers/recruiters. They come in two types, complete with costume: helpless elf maiden and drow priestess. The elf maidens motivate through positive reinforcement "Oh you are doing so well! Can't you do just one more for little old me? >bats eyes<" while the drow priestesses would motivate through negative reinforcement "You worthless pile of flab! How dare you even cast your eyes upon me! If I do not see 10 more reps I will fley your miserable excuse for a body!".

We figure no need to play to the female customer, males are the target audience. We can just offer a 50% discount to females and that should take care of most of our recruiting.

Ah, but you do need to remember that not all males are interested in females. Throw in Conan the Barbarian and perhaps the Gray Mouser and you're set.

 

[Prince of Happiness]

*blink* you too?

I've structured two campaigns around that premise. Hell, you've just laid out the plot of the one-shots that I'm running at GenCon.

"So, uh, what I do need to roll to make my skill check?"

"Roll the 12lb. d20, three sets of ten reps, NOW!"

 

[ShadowDenizen]

I don't think that my players would want me to GM oiled up in my undies, even if I were to wear a chainmail bikini to hold my man-boobs.

Well, you had me up until the "Man-Boobs" bit.

Throw in Conan the Barbarian and perhaps the Gray Mouser and you're set.

Nah. We need someone more like Mat or Perrin. (Or I'd take Jon Snow in a pinch.)

 

[paradox42]

Nah. We need someone more like Mat or Perrin. (Or I'd take Jon Snow in a pinch.)

Better. See, I was trying to think of somebody on the "thin and lithe" side, and couldn't come up with anything but the Mouser.

Perrin would be a favorite of mine! Yowza!

I must admit, though, I don't know who Jon Snow is.

 

[shurai]

I like Peanut Butter and Honey on Crackers. Low Fat, High Protein, and Mighty Tasty!
To drink, Cranberry Juice...its delish.

I like to do half-and-half with unflavored seltzer and fruit juice. Mighty tasty, reduces the calorie count by half, and sorta increases hydration by reduction of sugar. Not very manly, but in my view fruit juice is fruity enough to begin with that it can't get much worse. : P

Plus it makes more room for Guiness later on in the day. : ]