Why punish a player if they can't come to the game?

[Lord Pendragon]

I think the undercurrent of "I play with mature/adults, so my way is right" is hilarious.

I hope that I didn't come across that way.

My intended meaning is that, since I play with adults, I don't have players who will blow off my games. Therefore, I don't need to consider how to motivate players to show up, or what to do when players blow off my game. This is key in my attitude toward xp, since if I did have to deal with such things, my way would probably have to be modified in some way.

Would I start awarding xp only for attending players? I don't know, perhaps. But I'd certainly have to do something. My point about gaming with adults was merely that I don't have to deal with that issue, and therefore my take on the question at hand may not be relevant for those who do.

 

[jmucchiello]

I think the undercurrent of "I play with mature/adults, so my way is right" is hilarious.

I didn't say one way was more right than another. Frankly your attitude is far more condescending. You imply that people who can't attend game aren't making as much of an effort as those who do. What right do have to judge a player's effort or lack of effort to attend? If I say I can't make it, my friends accept that I did whatever I could to attend but could not. If that isn't good enough for them, if they doubt that, then they question my integrity. Why should I play with people who don't trust me?

 

[Arravis]

I think the undercurrent of "I play with mature/adults, so my way is right" is hilarious.

I don't think we're saying our way is right. It's a good system to have if you have mature players in your game.

What I find sad is that so many people game with blasé players who don't really care for their games. Players who would rather play Halo or World of Warcraft, or just stay on the couch watching TV and not bother calling. That's damn sad and I know the effort most of us put into our games deserves alot more then that.

 

[StupidSmurf]

Amen, I definately agree 100% Mallus...
and count me in on that geezerhood (and all of my players). I've been playing for 22 years. Man, I'm getting old.

I've been playing for 27 years. Every once in a while I pause, look back, and go "Holy Crap! Where's the time gone?" And the answer? "Gaming, you idiot! Where else!?"

And speaking of feeling old, my daughter just started college today. And yet she still is making plans to be at our every-other-week gaming session. What a great kid!

 

[Sundragon2012]

From my experience, most things that come up are or stemmed from, a personal choice. Whether it is that family you wound up starting while carousing one night [carpenter*], the lousy job you have because you quit the last one [closet gamer*] or the signifigant other you chose to be with[Mr smokes*].

I run a very high challenge game, If soemone does not show, their PC is given the hide at camp/ flee back to last safe location treatment. No XP is given.

*code names for my actual players.

Wow that is a cavalier attitude regarding the trials and tribulatons of human life. Of course many of the circumstances people encounted are based on choices but all choices cannot be considered equal by any stretch.

The choice to have a child or a family or a job is NOT the same as making a choice to get drunk the night before the session. The responsble choices of spouse, family, work, children, etc. are worlds seperate from the irresponsible choice of getting smashed and bailing in the group just because you wanted to get a good buzz.

I can see the irresponsible choices drawing the DMs ire, but not the choices that come with being a fully functional human being with commitments and responsibilities that transcend any leisure activity. For example if my son's birthday falls on the day of a D&D session....well screw D&D and let anyone who doesn't understand that be damned and screw the DM who would penalize me for being there for my son's birthday as opposed to playing a rousing game of make believe with my band of 30yr old male friends.

I LOVE this game but sometimes I have to set the game aside for the sake of my real life sometimes because I want to sometimes because I have to.

But I am the DM so I don't have to worry about that but by the same token I wouldn't punish my players for similar situations. If I did, I could fully expect the player to tell me to stick my DMs guide and my self-importance and stick it somewhere warm and dark and I would deserve it.


Chris

 

[ThirdWizard]

In the game I'm currently running, there is only the party XP total. Whenever a player sits down to play, with what ever character, that PCh as that much XP. New join, replacement PC, alternate PC created out of player whim, old PC swapped back into play, etc.

That is GENIUS!

I sit in awe.

No, it is a manners thing. Everyone else made the effort to show up to the game. They took time out of their busy schedules because it mattered to them. By agreeing to be a member of the group, you have made a committment. If you cannot honor that committment, then you should not be placed on the same level as everyone else that could.

I have player participation problems. Everyone in the group pretty much has to drive an hour to make it to the game except the host. One person doesn't even have a car. This means, since we're adults with lives, its an entie day event. Blah blah blah, anyway, you get the idea. It is almost impossible for everyone to make it to every game.

Having said that, XP is not the way that I get people to come to the game. I get them to come because its fun. If it isn't fun, all the XP in the world won't make anyone show up. And if it is fun, then not giving out XP to their characters isn't going to make them want to come any more. In other words, its a pretty poor punishment that accomplishes nothing in particular other than make the DM and his or her game feel more important.

So, as a punishment for not showing, it appears that it is a power thing to me. I mean, what does it accomplish beyond making the player feel even worse about not being able to make it to the game? What is the benfit?

 

[Mishihari Lord]

It sounds to me like the difference in XP awards comes from a difference in gaming philospohy. I think that From a GNS perspective it would go like this:

Gamist: Award XP for those who make the session, none for those who don't.

Narrativist: Full XP for all characters whether or not the PC or player was present.

Simulationist: Full XP if the character was there, whether or not the PC was. None otherwise.

I'm firmly in the S camp. Earning XPs for my accomplishments is fun for me. Receiving them arbitrarily from the DM is not.

 

[Arravis]

StupidSmurf, your daughter just started college... damn you are old!

I'm 33 and started gaming when I was 11. I really shouldn't count the first three years of gaming as "experience" though, it was pretty awful. Lot's of really silly stuff happening during that time... of course, I did get all that out of my system, so maybe it counts.

 

[Mallus]

I think the undercurrent of "I play with mature/adults, so my way is right" is hilarious.

I really think you're misreading this.

What I get from this thread is 'I play with mature/adults and (these) are the strategies I've employed to facilitate gaming with them'.

 

[Mallus]

And speaking of feeling old, my daughter just started college today. And yet she still is making plans to be at our every-other-week gaming session. What a great kid!

Congrats!