Mustrum_Ridcully
Legend
I am constantly telling my players that it is never me, the DM, doing X or Y to them; it is the setting and its inhabitants. I never seek to kill off characters; NPCs, on the other hand, may want to do so very much.
The distinction is, I feel, an important one, to the point that I try to make it very, very clear to new players that this is what is going on. The playstyle you're talking about here would seem to eventually lead to antagonistic DMing, because the players will interpret the DM's actions as antagonistic (whether intended as such or not). I'm not interested in a "DM vs. the players" set-up, because in such a thing, the DM always wins. The reverse, though - where it is silently understood that the DM and players are all working towards the same goal - doesn't interest me, either; there, players may get the sense that they are "unique and special snowflakes," or that they enjoy some sort of plot immunity.
In my mind, as the DM, my job is to set up the parameters of the setting, to determine reasonable chances of various events occuring, and to ensure that the setting remains interesting insofar as adventurers are concerned. Once the ball is set in motion, my job is purely as rules-adjudicator and as the players' means to access the world; an interface that enforces the physics of the world in question. My stance - as the DM - regarding the PCs is neutral and uncaring, just as the stance of the universe towards them is neutral and uncaring.
Do I necessarily enjoy it when the game ends in a TPK? No, not really. But at the point where it becomes a TPK, the situation is ideally out of my hands: the events that led to the party's death were predetermined (by which I mean that they were placed there without consideration of the party, specifically). If a situation would logically or sensibly end in a TPK, then it should do so.
Well, let me bring a hated word here:
What I, as the DM want, is "fun". I want fun. I have fun when my players are having fun.
If my players enjoy total "realismn" or "verisimilitude" with Pirates jumping on-top of them due to the random likelihood* of them arriving there and killing the entire crew, I will do that. But if they don't, I just won't. There will be a way out.
If a TPK can lead to an interesting situation in game, I am okay with it. If it just feels pointless, I'd rather avoid it.
*) I like random tables in a way - especially because they provide me with ideas for stuff that can happen/be found etc. But in another way - they don't explain why stuff happens.
If I roll my 5 % chance that the party will encounter the Dragon in the forest, the table doesn't tell me _why_ he does that exactly at this moment. And if I figure that the PCs won't survive any combat encounter against him, why shouldn't I make up a story that makes the combat option less likely - and dependent on the PCs actions?
Of course, I also could make up a random table giving the Dragons motivation. But at some point; I think I as the DM should take _direct_ control of the game. Everything relying on chance just don't work. Players usually don't roll the dice to determine whether they help the mayor or rather explore the dungeon of carnage. Why should I, as the DM, be differently?
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In a general "sandbox" context. I tend to think I would be willing and able to run a "tailored" sandbox. Of course, there are certain fixed points in a campaign. A dragon that is known to be of adult age won't change to an Ancient Wyrm or Young dragon just because of the PCs level. But the challenge that would involve him would change. 1st level PCs don't go hunting adult Dragos, and 20th level PCs will probably not find much challenge in fighting them. So a 1st level challenge might be a social challgene or an escape challenge (the PCs try to avoid getting eaten). At 20th level, the Pcs might want to make the dragon an ally so he helps them convincing other dragons of help. (Another social challenge). Or they try to trick him into attacking another foe and buying them some time.
The unique and intersting thing about a sandbox to me is that the PCs do have a lot of of decisions to make what goals they choose for themselves and which hooks they follow - and that these decisions impact the game world. The hooks they don't follow don't get forgotten, they grow. If they didn't deal with the Goblin attacks at 1st level, the Goblins might grow bold and attack a village, gaining new (more powerful) allies - allies that the 5th level PCs could choose to engage. A wizard hiding himself in his tower might, at 1st level, ask the PCs for some aid in his research, at 10th level, he might have invented a powerful necromantic ritual that gives him power over the dead, and at 20th level, he might be an influential member of an undead army trying to conquer the world.