Women who Roleplay at Convetions: Stalking Incidents?

[Andy Kitkowski]

Hey all- This is my first post here. I'm a regular at RPGNet but I wanted to pool as much of the online connunity as possible.

I'm doing a little research for an article comparing Japanese RPG culture to American RPG culture. Anyway, one of the best sources of Japn gaming culture is this one woman who writes a famous (in RPG circles) manga about various incidents and the like.

She makes note that a lot of women RPG players and conventiongoers (not herself personally, though, she says) have had incidents with stalking. That is, after the convention some guy (maybe that the girl played a session with, or just who happened to be at the convetion) would watch where she went and would follow her- To the station, to the train, transfer train, all the way towards her house.

Apparently this happens a lot to gamer/CCG/miniature-playing women in Japan. It's kind of the thing you'd normally chock up to Japanese Male Social Retardation (along with the usual gamer stereotypes like not bathing, being grossly obese, not changing clothes, etc).

I've personally never heard of even second-hand stalker stories.

If you are a woman who has been stalked (not even "stalked" in the "multiple day" thing- even just being followed around after the gaming event counts), or have heard secondhand of such an incident (I'm grasping here so I will accept hand-me-down stories, because my premise is that it doesn't happen that much, but I want to be proven wrong if I am), please share.

For science!

Thanks!
-Andy

 

[mythago]

Hm. I've had the usual creepy jerk run-ins, and occasional lovelorn wannabes, but I don't think I've ever been stalked in the way you describe.

 

[Elf Witch]

I have never had a problem at a con but I did have a little problem in a bookstore. I was looking at gaming books and this guy came over when he saw that I what I was looking at he asked if I was buying thme for my kids or maybe husband or a boyfriend. I told him I was buying them for me. He looked very surprised. I took the books and went to sit down to look them over. He took a seat near me and just stared at me. He didn't say anything more. It really started to bother me so I moved to the cafe for a drink. A few minutes later he followed me and did the same thing. Now I was getting freaked. I had walked to the bookstore so I did not want to leave and have him follow me. I ended up calling a male gaming buddy who lived near by and he drove over and picked me up.

We made some jokes about it like he had never seen a female gamer before but had heard the legends so when he actually saw one in the flesh he was stunned and unable to look away.

Most likely the guy was just socially retarded and didn't realize what a jerk he was being.

 

[Paul_Klein]

As a stunningly handsome guy, I've had similar problems with women stalking me ....

 

[megamania]

I have heard of no such things with gaming. I do know (as a guy) we tend think with the wrong glands. I know some of the strangest people I have ever met were at game conventions and (I hate to say this and will get heck for it) many gamers are socially retarded nerdy guys whom have girl/relationship issues. But I hope this artical you referred to isn't suggesting this is common. This can happen with anything. I just barelu got over the whole Washington DC sniper thing where some rich lawyer politician wanna-be suggest the shooter had to play D&D.

 

[WisdomLikeSilence]

I've gotten plenty of attention at Cons, and some of it has been inappropriate, but I've never felt physically threatened. I’m glad to say that I've never heard of any gamers being stalked, and I've never run into anyone at a Con who refused to take no for an answer.

-WLS

 

[Andy Kitkowski]

Thanks for the input, all. Any more stories you have would be appreciated. If you have interest in this topic, I've also gotten some interesting responses from the RPGNet forum, over here:
http://forum.rpg.net/showthread.php?s=&postid=460867#post460867

But I hope this artical you referred to isn't suggesting this is common. This can happen with anything.

No, I'm not going that road- I'm a gamer through and through, and am not looking for sensationalism. However, this is apparently a BIG issue in Japan- Enough for someone who never had it happen to her to devote like 3 chapters of a manga about it.

What kinda got me interested in the whole thing in America was a comment from her manga here:
Before the area shown, she was stating how some people might think stalking or obtrusiveness might be a simple misunderstanding related to enthusiasm- One person overhears a second talking about a certain book, movie, or place to eat, and that person jumps in to the conversation, excited to be able to talk to someone about it. This is pretty much how friends are made, right? Well, some people might not be able to get subtle hints from the people talking that their intrusion was not wanted- perhaps they weren't expressing this adequately enough.

<img src="http://www.z-builder.com/trpg/piyostalk.jpg">

Then, in the bit here, she is discussing with her publisher/assistant (as she does on issues throughout this manga) about what REAL stalkers think about stalking in general. The assistant remarks about how many stalkers don't even realize themselves that what they're doing is stalking, to which Naoko (the author) replies, "I guess the scariest thing is that people who stalk as much as 'criminal stalkers' probably think 'I'm not like that AT ALL!'..."

She then (the part I have highlighted) states "This kind of thing is also apparently a problem in America" (in other words, showing that it isn't a Japanese phenomenon).

However, out of the hundreds of Japanese stalking stories in geek habitats like Anime, Manga, RPG conventions and the like, I have certainly heard of similar stories in the US but not nearly as many. So I was wondering if her comments were accurate.

Thanks for the input- If anyone has anything more to share, please do!

 

[Dragongirl]

I have never gone to a gaming con, but have been to other conventions (which bore me to death), so can't say about cons. But I have had problems getting away from guys at bookstores, including one time the clerk. Though not as bad as a previous post, they didn't follow me, just don't take a hint when I want to leave.

Have had more of a problem on the internet with guys that find out I game. Had a couple guys that seemed to want to adopt me, but that is what block is for.

 

[Alzrius]

Being in Japan, studying Japanese Culture, and gearing up for my comprehensives in which I'll be displaying Japanese culture as seen through manga/anime, I'm curious about what manga that is and how old it is.

 

[Piratecat]

Hi, Andy! Welcome to the boards.

I've been to about 75 cons over the last ten years, and (other than a Living City player who kept following me around and telling me about his character - oh, you think I'm kidding, do you?) I'm not immediately familiar with any stalking incidents at all. I know times that women have been approached with unwelcome advances, but all of those were appropriately handled with no creepy follow-through on the part of the wanna-be romantic. I suspect that this may be largely an urban legend.