D&D General Worst D&D advice

If a nonhuman isn't a translator or merchant, there is no reason they speak Common. They would only speak the dominant and racial languages of their area

It's the players' fault if they make poor language choices. It's part of the game. If they can't speak to any NPCs, too bad.
... why would they need to speak to the NPCs? (See post #13 above)
 

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A full set of dice for the game is a set made of hundreds of dice. So when you throw a dice, you can them let it rest for the rest of the game to avoid probability anomalies
 


When you can tell a DM has spent a lot of time developing an NPC to advance the story, kill it. In fact, that should be your reaction to every NPC you meet, because they are all secret agents of evil.
 

DMs: remember to make every npc a jerk. It's much more realistic if every person the pcs meet hate them immediately, passionately, and thoroughly. No one likes it when npcs are helpful.
 


You will never have more fun in a game of D&D than when you play a loner orphaned edgelord who refuses to group up with or even talk to the other PCs. And the perfect game of D&D is four PCs sitting in opposite corners of a tavern glaring menacingly at each other without saying a word for the entire four-hour session. Stalwartly refusing every single call to adventure or plot hook the DM throws your way. If you can find that perfect group. Never leave. That campaign will be the stuff of legends.
 

There's a test to become a DM, but don't worry, for 10 bucks I'll get you accredited. Also, you should totally charge to DM- you think Matt Mercer does that for free?
 

Complain constantly about how D&D doesn't do what systems you like better do.

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Use D&D for every role-playing style, setting, and goal.
 

Challenge Rating is for babies, every encounter needs to be a Deadly + encounter! Your players will thank you for treating them like adults!
 

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