You will ALL love GNOMES! Dark legacies feature #1.

[Ravellion]

Well I already like Gnomes But this book looks cool.

My favourite:

Jan: So Viconia I suppose you must be a Drow eh?

Viconia: Speak not to your betters surface slave

Jan: My brother Eldgar Buttercup had skin the shade of characoal too. Well technically it WAS charcoal. He died in a nasty fire you see.

Viconia: You do love the sound of your own voice dont you gnome?

Jan: My own voice? Heartless wench! Do you not know? I am deaf. I have never heard the sound of my own voice. I read lips ... (sob) ... only lips.

Viconia: Deaf?Truly? In the Underdark the deaf are killed or used in pain threshold experiments.

Jan: I heard that! In fact it reminds me of the time I was eaten by an avater of Lloth. I was stuck inside her stomach with a miserable drow called Biffle Chump for days. Of course I was forced to eat him. A matter of survival you understand. Nothing personnal. He tasted a bit like chicken.

Viconia: (Charname), how is it that you travel with such a wee buffoon?

(Charname): Truthfully it all goes back to that time that Jan's cousin, Plooty Paladin Pipe, got caught in a nasty flesh golem eating contest...

Jan: Aye, Plooty had a way of attracting golems. Brilliant really, you start with a saucer of milk - golems really are suckers for milk...

Viconia: I refuse to listen to this

 

[Trickstergod]

Not to be a belligerent asshat, but as someone who doesn't like gnomes as they're generally presented now, I like these even less. Instead of just tinker gnomes, they're tinker gnomes with teeth. If I want stolid dedication and determination with a propensity for war, I'll look to dwarves.

But, to each their own.

 

[DWARF]

Yeah, that's what I was going to say, so you made Gnomes into size-small Dwarves with steampunk technology?

 

[Red Spire Press]

There's a layer of hell for publishers who make eager buyers wait that long for their product...

But its a far less miserable layer of hell than that which is saved for publishers who release products before they're properly finished.