JamesonCourage
Adventurer
I'm going to hold back on my thoughts on how you should react. I have them, but they're mostly nothing new now that we're seven pages deep.I've posted about one of my players before. There is a fairly long thread about it. [SNIP]
I keep going over it in my mind and I can't figure out what to do. Any thoughts or suggestions?
I did want to respond to say that I have read your posts on this player before, and your social group before. You know, your posts about your friends. Generally, friends are an important part of people's lives. With that in mind, I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry you're going through this. Yes, D&D is a game, but as it has affected your friendship with various people, it has undoubtedly led to very real, negative emotions. And that just sucks.
So I wanted to say that I'm sorry you have to go through something that sucks. I don't want to downplay it, or dismiss it. There's probably some amount of real anxiety underneath the frustration and anger and resentment. But that's okay. That's human, and that's normal. And I wanted someone to communicate that.
At the end of the day, yes, D&D is just a game. But it's okay to be passionate about it. It's understandable that real drama can arise from our passions. And, when we account for the human factor (your relationship with your friend [the GF], the player who you've had trouble with, their relationship with one another and with your mutual friends, etc.), things can get messy. And that's okay. It sucks, but it's understandable.
Anyway, you have a lot of advice here to read over and think about. You have a place to vent more, if you need it. But at the end of the day, just know that it's okay to feel those emotions. It's normal. Feel them, process them, and settle on a solution that soothes those negative emotions in the long term. That's my opinion, at least.
People say D&D isn't worth the drama. I think sometimes it makes sense for it to spill over. Life, though... that's not worth going through if you constantly feel anxious and angry and resentful and frustrated. Do what you need to do to make peace with your feelings and put them behind you. Sometimes it's just venting and accepting a situation, sometimes it's a life change. Find what works for you. It's your life.
Sorry for the long post. Stay strong. You've got this gamer's emotional support, at least. Good luck, Majoru, and happy hunting.