D&D 5E Dungeons and Dragons and the RPG Stigma

SilverfireSage said:

Mid 20s for me. He's gotten engaged with me on other topics like the new Avengers movie and video games. Really it's only been D&D which is why I was curious if anyone else has had such adverse reactions.

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So the in question likes comic book movies and video games (both of which use very similar escapist elements to TRPGs) but pokes fun at the hobby responsible for the biggest grossing video games of all time? Solid reminder that a piece of paper and 12 years of university and internships bears no correlation to analytical prowess.

Sorry to hear for you, though, that someone you held respect for turned out to be an ass. It can be quite disappointing when it happens.

thalmin said:

It's been a long time since I encountered any negative reactions (other than edition warring). Years ago, it wasn't that D&D was for nerds, but rather "Isn't that the game that makes people commit suicide?" or else "But that's devil worshipping."

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Unfortunately not so where I live...

Here in the "Bible belt" of the U.S.A. admission of D&D playing is tantamount to satan-worship, even today. I've had people literally walk away hurriedly and never, EVER under any circumstances would I bring that up at work for fear of losing my job.

Yes, my nerd-friends, hatred for D&D and anyone who doesn't fit the mold is still alive and well, much to the sadness of my friends and I. Posting a want ad for a new game anywhere other than within the safety of the one (of two) gaming stores within a 50 mile radius will most definitely have the redneck Gestapo arriving for a chat.

I'm tempted to say that [MENTION=1]Morrus[/MENTION] is right: the guy's a jerk. Lots of people have preconceptions, and often work from them -- generally to great success. That doesn't mean he is a jerk (though he sounds like it). Unfortunately, both preconceptions and jerks are a part of life, especially at the office.

Personally, I don't discuss D&D at the office. As a programmer, I'm probably missing as many new gaming buddies as I am negative reactions. It just isn't worth it, in professional terms. It also isn't worth getting upset over. Job is job. Life is life. I'm glad I have a job I enjoy, and where I get along with people. I don't confuse colleagues with friends, though.

I don't mention D&D to anyone. Even working in a nerdy industry where computer gaming is talked about from time to time, D&D is just considered juvenile by many people. Wrongly, of course.

Heck, it took me a year or so to mention it to my partner. She thought I was working on weekends, shuffling papers around and talking on skype. She event made me sandwiches and everything... (until I told her what I was really doing).

DaveDash said:

Heck, it took me a year or so to mention it to my partner. She thought I was working on weekends, shuffling papers around and talking on skype. She event made me sandwiches and everything... (until I told her what I was really doing).

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Dang. I wouldn't even date a girl who didn't D&D.

SilverfireSage said:

A curious thing happened to me today that I'm guessing has happened around a dozen times ove the last year. I work at a hospital essentially as a unit clerk, and as such I have quite a bit of time on my hands. Recently, I've taken to bringing my 5E books to prepare for material for upcoming sessions, and generally work on my campaign setting. I've recieved a few comments on it, generally curiosity, with very little of it being negative (in fact, a coworker recently has wanted to start playing, which I found extremely pleasing.). But today, a doctor approached who I hold in high regard, someone whom I hope will write a recommendation for me for medical school. The second he saw the book, he seemed incredulous that I would play it. Contempt was dripping from his voice, and he warned me to not bring up this hobby to the admissions boards under any circumstances. Not only that, but he went on, speaking in a stereotypical nasally nerd drawl, to the laughter of many of the nurses around.

This isn't something entirely new to me. I've had to deal with prejudice against nerds all my life. But in all those cases, it was children or teenagers doing the teasing, not adults, and it floored me how derisive he ws towards a simple hobby. With a resurgence of nerd culture into the mainstream, comic books and sci if action films being the highest grossing films, Skyrim and World of Warcraft being incredibly popular, I had thought maybe some of the stigma attached to D&D might have disappeared. It made my blood boil, and I truly had to take a moment to collect myself before I said something unprofessional.

has anyone else had similar issues recently? Any stories of good? I'm sincerely hoping that this is an isolated incident, but it doesnt make me hopeful for the brand or for RPGs In general.

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Your doctor you hold in high regard is a wit. I work in the medical field, most of my coworkers know I'm a gamer and avowed nerd, their comments were positive and inquisitive. Hold true to your hobby, be an ambassador and distance yourself from that jerk. He clearly has unresolved issues.

One of the advantages of being older, is that I no longer really have to care about what others think. I have my family and friends, who've known about my geek-hood for forever. My bosses judge me entirely on the quality of my work; they consider my geek-hood to actually be some kind of plus (geeks are smart, right?). Most of my friends are fellow geeks and gamers, and everyone else can [censored].

The stigma will NEVER go away. You just stop caring as time goes on

shidaku said:

Dang. I wouldn't even date a girl who didn't D&D.

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I could if she made me samiches while I gamed!

Mercule said:

Personally, I don't discuss D&D at the office. As a programmer, I'm probably missing as many new gaming buddies as I am negative reactions. It just isn't worth it, in professional terms. It also isn't worth getting upset over. Job is job. Life is life. I'm glad I have a job I enjoy, and where I get along with people. I don't confuse colleagues with friends, though.

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I'm the opposite in some ways. I play D&D at the office in a revolving door of players and DMs (we alternate), there are 5 groups who play and we're all having a blast playing 5th edition generally. I however do not mix work relationships with personal ones. I used to, but then I learned my lessons. Actually a few years ago I started into a pathfinder group through work and it was great fun, then some big life events happened around town and it drove a wedge between two factions, to the point of the work environment was affected and things got awkward until eventually one guy quit (he was a young lad but he had other issues to sort out). This time around, when one of the girls in my group tried to add me to facebook I politely declined saying that I prefer not to make my home life and close friends merge with my colleagues, because there is such a thing as too much information, and I don't necesserily want every thing I write or say to possibly be scrutinized or get back to me. Work is political, and someone that you may enjoy playing D&D with you might disagree violently on politics. But you still need to get along at the office, while being able to still share your opinions and thoughts with your friends. So it's best to keep some things separate, and it's not D&D because I could care less. If someone looked down on me for that I'd ask them if they watch football or played poker or risk or watched the lord of the rings or the avengers and then let them have it. But instead I don't even have discussions with buttwipes like that, I just ignore them unless I have to interact with them and then I do so in a courteous and professional manner. But I disdain fake friendships and mixing work and home life. I think it's unwise to have colleagues let alone your boss on your facebook. Not so much for fear of them commenting on something you wrote or using that against you, but because you will find yourself censoring your own thoughts and ideas by playing politics. Why on earth would I want to do that?

Your boss is not your friend, your colleagues should be kept at arm's length, unless of course you are really friends but even then, be ware! Things can turn ugly and interpersonal fallouts can affect work, and work's already hard enough as it is, so why add potential fuel to the fire and make your life more complicated. It's complicated enough.

D&D however is simple. If you have a boss who looks down on it, smile and be polite then immediately cease chit chatting with them about it. Keep a PDF on your PC with the rules instead of open on your desk and work on your campaign that way.

I haven't had any real trouble, but I work hard to keep it that way. I'm a gamer and a pro-wrestling fan. It's pretty rare I can carry on a conversation regarding either, without wondering about my employment. My immediate supervisors over the years have always been happy to accept me as the Resident Geek, since I was pretty low maintenance. With anybody higher up the food chain, I try to make Bob Newhart look exciting by comparison.

The thing is, you can never really tell what will set off somebody like that. For example, I was once asked directly in an interview if I was a Green Bay Packers fan. I'm pretty sure I missed out on that job just by admitting I wasn't really into football, despite living less than an hour's drive from Lambeau Field.