Stupidest things PCs/DMs have done

[Evilhalfling]

Low level party, fighting a Stag Beetle.
3 of 4 characters are very wary of the beetle's Horns knowing that one hit will put someone down. They snipe and duck behind trees to avoid charges, basically wolf-packing it. The 4th player moves into melee, but can't hurt it. The beetle tramples him on the way to one of the snipers. A round or 2 later the beetle retreats into its lair, badly wounded. The rest of the party begins discussing smoking it out, or at least getting some light. The wounded PC (with darkvision) rushes into the hole.

The other players exchange glances "We wait for the screaming to end and start gathering dry wood". One 16 hp hit later, the screaming ends. Later the body was pulled of the beetles horns and burned on the pyre.

The player went through 3 other charaters before the campaign ended.

 

[Evilhalfling]

Some details of my current characters stupidity:
After the rogue disarms a trap "Oh hey are will still immune to poison? I lick the needle"
we weren't. I took 3 wisdom damage.

we had a map with 3 marked pits.
After finding out that we had a spool of rope we were using to cross the first pit did not get smaller, I exuberently grabbed the spool and went running down the hallway. I was carrying the parties only light. The next pit was closer than it appeared on the map. As I fell in I managed to drop the spool and grab the rope, keeping myself from hitting bottom. The cleric, still tied to the other end of the rope, was jerked off his feat and into the first pit.

The 3 pits were only 5' wide and we knew they were there. Even after casting spider climb, four characters fell in them.

While exploring the sample dungeon in the DMG - "I rearrange the sacks to make a nest for my familiar" (a penguin) DM "okay that releases a cloud of yellow mold spores" my familar has 4 hd and 6 hp, as well as an even CON -Con damage sucks!

 

[shilsen]

Some details of my current characters stupidity:
After the rogue disarms a trap "Oh hey are will still immune to poison? I lick the needle"
we weren't. I took 3 wisdom damage.

Creatures with no wisdom are immune to Wis damage

 

[Panthanas]

...using a ring with one wish to wish a vampire and all of his minions dead....

 

[jdrakeh]

Oh. God. . .

Star Wars D6 Expanded Universe with Homebrew Imbellishment

This was actually one of the best (and long-lasting) RPG campaigns that I played, largely becaue of the homebrewed elements and the GM's happy and free approach to bringing the AWESOME at every game session. Basically, if you could create a balanced build for something using the basic D6 rules from Star Wars (2nd Edition), you could play it. So. . .

We had a cyborg bounty hunter, a Vampire (yeah, White Wolf-style), an Immortal (yeah, Highlander-style), a failed Jedi, and a bounty hunter with a symbiotic power suit (yeh, Venom-style). Crazy right? Well, in point of fact, it was crazy fun! Except for thwe guy who played the Vampire. . .

Instead of doing stuff with the group, the guy who played the Vamp was always about trying to prove his physical/mental/social dominance to others. Always. In fact, the Vamp was just the latest in a long line of "I've got something to prove!" characters. You'll see why in just a moment

Anyhow, we're on Tatooine (the GM trying to lead into the Tatooine Manhunt module) and while the rest of the party is gearing up, the Vamp gets side-tracked trying to prove his physical superiority to an NPC super-soldier who was briefly travelling in tow. So, how does he do this? He dares the NPC to stab him.

In the chest.

Right through the heart.

No, if you'll recall, I said that out GM has a 'if you can build it balanced, you can play it' thing going on. Well, part of the balance in the Vamp's case was Torpor per White Wolf. If a Vamp gets stabbed in the heart, it interrupts the blood flow, paralyzing them until said blood flow is restored. And the player knows this. In fact, he wrote our house rules for it.

So, here he is, Vamp the Mighty, telling this super soldier to stab him in the heart with a combat knife. Everybody except for the player obviously sees the danger in this. . . but we're off buying equipment. So our characters can't really say anything. The GM, being a generally merciful sort asks, as the NPC, three times. . .

"Are you sure you want me to stab you there?"

And, three time, Vamp the Mighty says "Do it! I bet you're not man enough!". So the GM shrugs, says "Okay" and picks up a handful dice to roll damage (no need to roll a 'to hit' on an immobile target, per our house rules). And, just as the dice, are hitting the table, the player of Vamp the Mighty suddenly realizes what is going on.

'Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

I swear, it was like the cry of a man who had just been told that his first born child died. And the look on his face. I still get all giggly when I picture it in my mind's eyes

 

[Slife]

...using a ring with one wish to wish a vampire and all of his minions dead....

How is this stupid?

 

[sukael]

How is this stupid?

Well, given that a vampire is already dead...

 

[Slife]

Well, given that a vampire is already dead...

I thought they were un-dead. "un" as in not.

 

[sukael]

I thought they were un-dead. "un" as in not.

Yes, but wishing a vampire dead isn't going to do anything, given that undead are destroyed at 0 hp. They never actually "die".

 

[shilsen]

Yes, but wishing a vampire dead isn't going to do anything, given that undead are destroyed at 0 hp. They never actually "die".

Semantics.

But then again I've never been one of those DMs who figure that when someone uses a Wish they must focus on the minutiae of his wording and screw him by hook or crook. When someone's using a 9th lvl spell, and in this case one in a very valuable item, I'm damned if I'd screw him because the player's wording wasn't the most precise. And none of my DMs would either, which is why I game with them.