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D&D 5E The big mechanical expansion

Let's see.

I would like to see the following-

1. More tables.
2. References to other books that are not yet completed.
3. Even more tables.
4. Appendices; did you know that after you get to the Z appendix, you go to AA appendix? Yeah, that!
5. Tables that cross-reference other tables.
6. Words that I like. Antipathy. Chrysoprases. Libram. Dweomer. Syndicracy. Antipathy. Brazier.
7. Tables that require percentile rolls.
8. Gatekeeping for abilities and classes; you know, like, "You can have psionics if you roll 99-100 on d%," or "You can play a Warlord, Brad, if you are at least 8' tall. Not your Goliath character ... you, Brad."
9. Cooler tables, and more of them.
10. No index. Indices are for PEOPLE THAT KAN'T REED GUD.
11. A lot of crunch that I will not use, like the average tunneling distance of a Norker mine worker, expressed in cubits per fortnight. Preferably in ... a table.
12. Addition of new abilities that are thoroughly incompatible with the base rules. How about a seventh ability! That would be so ... perfect.
13. More tables than Ikea has meatballs ... or tables.

That about covers it.

Have you considered...

https://1d4chan.org/wiki/FATAL

Should have every table you ever wanted... and definitely every table you NEVER wanted.
 

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A common dungeon trope is a 10' x 10' room with an orc. And Pie. Consult the Pie Table to determine what kind of Pie:



d6+d8

2 The Orc ate the pie. There is only a cheap tin remaining with some crumbs. You can get a 1 cp for turning the tin in to a baker.
3 Shepherds Pie. Not the good Kind like grandma makes, but the medieval version, with leftover bits of roadkill.
4 Cake.
5 Key Lime Pie.
6 Coconut Cream Pie.
7 Cherry Pie.
8 Pumpkin Pie.
9 Apple Pie.
10 Lemon Meringue Pie.
11 Chocolate Cream Pie.
12 Pecan Pie.
13 Halfling Meat Pie. Not Halfling meat, but rather Meat Pies that Halflings make. Or Halfling Meat, why not?
14 Quiche.

At least you don't have a cake table. Everyone knows that the cake is a lie. :mad:
 


d6+d8

2 The Orc ate the pie. There is only a cheap tin remaining with some crumbs. You can get a 1 cp for turning the tin in to a baker.
3 Shepherds Pie. Not the good Kind like grandma makes, but the medieval version, with leftover bits of roadkill.
...and occasional bits of shepherd, be they dog or human...
4 Cake. It's a Lie.
5 Key Lime Pie.
6 Coconut Cream Pie.
7 Cherry Pie.
8 Pumpkin Pie.
9 Apple Pie.
10 Lemon Meringue Pie.
11 Chocolate Cream Pie.
12 Pecan Pie.
13 Halfling Meat Pie. Not Halfling meat, but rather Meat Pies that Halflings make. Or Halfling Meat, why not?
14 Quiche.
Also note that Cream Pies of any kind can be used as a one-shot blinding weapon, a martial concept originally pioneered by those knightly paragons of non-lethal combat Sir Laurel and Sir Hardy. However also note that no character is likely to be proficient in pie thus standard non-proficiency penalties apply...

Lan-"splat!"-efan
 


Pie tables aside. And cake. And tarts... And healthy fruit salads and vegetable casseroles. - what I'd really like to see:
Massively expanded weapon and armor options. Non-magical, regular weapons and armor that have appeared in several other renditions of the game.

Expanded class options for other regions/cultures. If we must use Forgotten Realms examples- Kara Tur, Al Qadim, the Horse Nomads (Mongols,) pirates, etc.

More archetypes for every class.

As others have mentioned, more feats, preferably non-weapon.

More spells.

I'm still not sure Mike Mearls seems really serious about a rules-heavy expansion from what I've read. I thought the design attitude for 5th Ed was to put out the basic material and let everyone decide the rest for themselves? Most of the new expansion-type material was supposed to be attached to new adventures? Maybe I'll go back and re-read some articles.

Mmm pie.
 

I thought the design attitude for 5th Ed was to put out the basic material and let everyone decide the rest for themselves?
Is that why they only ever released the basic pdf, and we never got a Player's Handbook, let alone an FR supplement with the questionable acronym 'SCAG?' That explains a lot. ;)


Mmmmm.... pi....

...it's 3.14159265358979....
...again!
 


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